Âme Soeur
by ange de l'aube
Summary: AH/OOC. Edward and Bella are haunted by dreams. Dreams about a past that is not even theirs. Or is it? Their worlds will turn upside-down once these two lost souls find each other. Is this really the first time they have met?
1. Prologue

**Quick A/N: **There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Prologue**

"**A soul**** mate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for whom we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise. Our soul mate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person. Our soul mate is the one who makes life come to life."**

_Richard Bach_

Tears were streaming down the girl's face but they weren't typical tears of sadness. They say the eyes are the window to the soul; they are also the means through which your soul bleeds when it's wounded—or in this case, broken.

The girl hugged herself like she was trying to contain the broken pieces of her soul escaping her body. However, souls once broken cannot be easily glued back together like a broken vase. No, broken souls are almost impossible to mend or contain. They seep out of our bodies, dissolve into space, and get lost. She was a lost soul now.

A boy stood near the door, wearing a pained look. He was struggling with himself. He wanted to console the girl, but his own pain was just too much to allow him the strength to be of any comfort. His soul, too, had left his body. He was soulless, empty.

"I love you…" the girl murmured in a soft broken voice.

"I do too," the boy answered simply. "But it's just not enough. You've broken every piece of me. I have nothing left to give."

The girl's eyes were filled with sorrow, her soul already shattered, breaking into impossibly smaller pieces. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, I was drunk, I was angry, I'm so sorry…" she repeated. She knew sorry was not enough. What she had done could not be taken back. She had destroyed the greatest thing she had. She always destroyed everything.

As if answering her thoughts he said, "Sorry just isn't enough anymore," and turned to leave.

"Please…" the girl whimpered.

The boy sighed deeply, pressing his forehead to the door. It wasn't a frustrated sigh, or a longing one. It was an exhausted sigh; he could take no more.

"I can't…" he replied to the girl's plea. "I just can't anymore. If I stay I'll die."

"If you go I will," was the girl's response.

"It doesn't matter," the boy added, turning to face her one last time. "I think we're both already dead, _mon amour_, and this is just our bodies having a pointless conversation."

And with that he left the room, closing the door behind him, closing his heart with it.

A wail rooted in the deepest part of the girl's chest could be heard through the entire house. The last piece of her soul had finally left her body.

Time does not heal all wounds. Some wounds follow us through the centuries. However, life renews itself, and time obliterates all traces of past sorrows, so that only those involved suffer with the memory of them. Their lives might have stopped, but the World doesn't stop spinning on their behalf.

In another time and another place, a girl sat in her bed, studying a French phrasebook. She had always been fascinated by the language, and had recently decided she wanted to learn it.

She was skimming through the pages when she found a definition that made her stop. The sound of those words in her head gave her an eerily familiar feeling, as if she should remember something she could not. She read the words again, tasting the flavor of them in her mouth. It was bittersweet.

The words read like this:

**Soul mate: âme soeur**

Why did she feel such a connection to these words? She was about to turn fifteen and had never thought much about love or soul mates. They were foreign to someone so young. They were, to her, only part of story books. Part of fantasy.

But somehow, put together, English against its French counterpart, those words caused in her a feeling similar to something pulling at the depths of her mind, as a soft and warm sensation filled a hidden part of her heart.

"Bella!" she heard her mother call, taking her out of her reverie. "It's late honey, you need to sleep. The movers will be here early in the morning," her mother finished, peeking through Bella's door.

"Sorry mom," Bella answered, smiling sheepishly and setting the phrase book on her side table.

"It's okay, hon," Renee replied, coming closer to her daughter's bed. Renee loved to tuck her baby girl into bed.

Bella sighed. She sensed that the reason her mom was so overprotective was the frequent nightmares she suffered from, nightmares that had haunted her ever since she could remember, the same one over and over again.

"Goodnight, honey," Renee said kissing Bella's forehead.

"Goodnight, mom," Bella replied slowly letting sleep take over.

Renee crept out of the bedroom. She didn't want to disturb her daughter or her husband, who was currently working in his office across the hallway. Closing the door silently, she pressed her back against the wall just outside. She needed a few moments to gather herself.

The decision to move to Forks had not been an easy one. All the things that happened there, all of it, was just so tragic. Renee shuddered; goosebumps covered her arms at the thought of the ghosts of the past that waited in her hometown, the lost souls of her loved ones.

She had moved to Seattle hoping to erase the past, to forget it ever occurred. But the past has a funny way of hunting us down no matter where we go. Renee glanced at the door next to her and thought, _"It's worth the pain because I'm doing it for her."_

All of this, the move, the change of air, everything was devoted to seeing her daughter happy. She was determined to see her daughter happy. _Like _she_ should have been_. Renee's eyes filled with unshed tears remembering _her_. She didn't think of _her_ often, at least when she could avoid it. Thinking of what could have been was just too depressing. She was just about to leave for her own room, to read Cosmo or something equally light and entertaining to keep her mind off such somber thoughts, when she heard the screams. She knew that screaming voice because she had been the one who created it. She knew those cries because she was used to them by now. And she knew that her daughter needed her, to scare the lost souls away. She breathed deeply before turning the door knob, and entered the bedroom where her haunted daughter was writhing in pain.

Meanwhile, a similar scene was taking place in the small town of Forks. In a big house hidden by thick greenery, and with the Olympic Mountains as a backdrop, a boy lay in bed. Sweat covered his body; he was tossing and turning, nightmares haunting his sleep. Suddenly, the boy woke up whimpering. His cries weren't loud, but they were heartfelt. Not a whole minute after he so brusquely returned to reality, his door was being opened by none other than his best friend in the whole world. A pixie-like girl with pig-tails, dressed in pink pajamas, entered his bedroom and rushed to his bed.

Once there, she stood at the foot, unsure of how to console the sobbing boy. After her first few seconds of hesitation, Alice Cullen sat next to her cousin Edward, and offered her hand, which he gladly took. Just the mere presence of his cousin brought his breathing back to normal. They were both connected by more than a last name. They were connected by friendship and complicity. They were both only children, and almost the same age, so it was no surprise that they came to understand each other so well.

Alice caressed Edward's cheek with her free hand. The distraught boy welcomed the soothing warmth of his cousin, leaning into her touch. Meanwhile, Alice pondered the nature of Edward's haunted mind. He was a sweet, caring boy. He did not deserve so much torture. He deserved a decent night's sleep. The black circles under his eyes were proof enough of that. Alice had always been a sensitive girl, and lately she had felt something looming over Edward. She could almost see the wheels of fate turning, setting things in motion.

As she considered these facts, Edward had slowly sunk back into bed, surrendering to exhaustion and falling into a dreamless sleep. Alice smiled at this, thankful that she had spent the night at his house and that his parents had not heard him cry. It was getting harder and harder to hide this from the adults in the family. But Edward didn't want to worry anyone. _Selfless, always selfless_, Alice thought. _He really does need a good dose of selfishness_, her mind added as an afterthought.

After a few minutes sitting next to her slumbering cousin, making sure he would not wake up again, Alice stealthily climbed down from Edward's bed and left his bedroom, sighing deeply and hoping that whatever it was that was looming in Edward's future was a good thing.

The next morning found a tired-looking Bella sitting on her porch, doodling in a notebook, while her parents loaded their SUV with the last items left behind by the movers. Today was the day they were moving to Renee's hometown. Bella didn't mind this fact at all. She had always been a loner, closed up in her own mind, either drawing or writing short poems. She felt closer to books than she did to people; the only true connections in her life were her parents. She was losing nothing, and a small town life might be a good thing for a loner such as her. She was sure that people in towns had to be calmer and less intrusive than people in the city.

Renee soon summoned Bella to take her seat in the back of the SUV. It was time for them to leave Seattle behind.

Bella smiled softly at her mother, as her father climbed on the driver's side. Once she took her seat and fastened her seatbelt, she continued doodling and writing random words and phrases in her notebook, sure that she could use some of them for a short poem or drawing.

As the SUV ventured onto the highway towards Forks, Bella glanced through her window from time to time. The closer they got the more green she saw. Green trees and rocks melted in front of her into an endless rainbow of shades, all green in nature. The only different colors she could see were the black pavement under their car, and the grey skies above their heads. It suited her mood. She sat back after a while, tired of watching green stuff and looked down at her notebook. What she found there shocked her profoundly. It wasn't just the randomness of the words, it was something else entirely. The words, like the ones in the phrase book she had read the night before, called to a part of her that she could feel was buried deep down. She read them again, whispering them only loud enough for her ears.

"_Why do you love me?"_

Meanwhile, Edward Cullen was still sleeping in his bed. He'd had a rough night and his mom had allowed him to sleep in, not a common occurrence in Esme Cullen's military-run house. He turned in his sleep, placing his body face down in the bed. He started to mumble while his mom picked up the laundry that was in the basket just inside his bedroom. When she was about to leave Edward's room, trying to close the door as quietly as possible, she heard him mutter in his sleep,

"_Because I have no choice…" _

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**A/N** so I have posted stuff before, but never with the help of a Beta. For this story, however, I got help and went through the appropriate process that every writer should follow, if possible. If I had to thank every single person that encouraged me to post this story, I would probably set a record in length of A/N. So, just know I thank you, you all know who you are and what participation you had in my process.

However, there are specific people I do want to thank, and who I'll probably keep thanking.

**Lemonmartinis**, because she made me re-write this Prologue and was my main cheerleader when I had no one else, she's an awesome person, and very kind pre-reader.

**DanteLevine**, the most amazing Beta I could have gotten, she has the patience of a Saint to deal with my raw material, trust me.

**Rhian0000**, my dear friend, who encouraged me and took time out of her busy schedule to do a final pre-read to sooth my nerves. Thank you for everything, I wouldn't be posting without your support.

I'll try to post every Sunday. I posted today solely to mark my birthday. My chapters will be short, probably between 1500/5000 words, depending on where I feel the chapter should end.

I'm on Twitter as **ange_de_laube** if you want to follow. Or you could always follow my Blog.

Thanks for taking the time to read.

Love,

Ange


	2. Restless

**Quick A/N: **There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: ****Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 1: Restless**

"**What difference is there between us, save a restless dream that follows my soul but fears to come near you?"**

_Kahlil Gibran_

Rain fell like teardrops from the sky, slow thick drops that bathed the trees and streets of Forks, Washington. Bella sat on her bed with a Jane Austen compilation in her lap but truly, she was lost in thought. The sound of rain reminded Bella of the sound of an ancient grandfather clock, _tick tock_, _tick tock_. The hands of the analog clock on the nightstand moved almost at the same rhythm the rain fell. _Tick tock_, _tick tock_. With the clock and rain symphony, Bella considered the changes in her life over the last few days. For one she didn't feel so tired anymore. In spite of the awful amount of rain that seemed to constantly fall from the grey skies of Forks, ever since the first night she spent in the new house she slept soundly, deeply, dreamless.

This was a big adjustment. She used to take long naps after school when she lived in Seattle, because it seemed as if the _dreams_ were strictly a nighttime occurrence. Now, with her sleep patterns finally settling into normal ones, she didn't have that need. She had plenty of time to spend doing whatever she wanted in the afternoons, now that napping wasn't a necessity. Frankly, she didn't know what to do with herself with all the extra time. Yes, writing and drawing, her usual hobbies, served as entertainment, and reading did the trick as well. But now that she had it, time seemed to be, ironically, too abundant.

Bella sighed; the symphony of rain increased in tempo, slowly morphing into a new movement that included the whooshing of wind and the scratching of the claw-like branches of the tree just outside the window. None of those sounds was truly conducive to sleep; none of them were part of Bella's mental library of sounds. They were all foreign. Yet with all the time she lived in Seattle, she had never felt more at home, more at peace, than she did in Forks, even given some recent developments.

She lay back in bed, staring at the ceiling and finally giving up her attempt to read, the Jane Austen compilation falling with a thud to the floor. She ignored the book and focused on the events of the last two days. The move, how tiresome it was, how complicated and annoying. The new house, the feeling of familiarity that warmed Bella's heart the moment she entered. Was it because it belonged to her family for generations? Or was there something more?

A clap of thunder signaled a different direction to the music outside, the wind, thunder, rain, branches and clock mingling into a beautiful allegro. Bella smiled at the ceiling, thanking whatever gods decided to end her torment. It was enough with the nightmares. Bella sighed and almost purred in contentment, turning momentarily to snuggle into the duvet. Despite the peace, a nagging feeling reminded her that something was still missing.

Bella closed her eyes and thought about the people she and her parents met while they moved into the new house. A family by the name of Newton was the most irritating of their new acquaintances. The mother would not stop yapping about various topics of gossip in town, and her son ogled Bella like she had two heads. The father seemed resigned to his wife's antics and just nodded at everything she said. Bella figured he was planning ways to kill himself or turn himself deaf, anything to be freed from the woman he was tied to _until death did they part_. The thought put a smile on Bella's lips.

Luckily, Renee used the chaos of the move and the very wearisome drive they had just endured, to get rid of the aggravating duo and its miserable patriarch. Bella almost felt sorry for Mr. Newton.

That incident, and the many other neighbors and people of Forks who had welcomed them, showed Bella that small town life was not what she thought and that her first day at Forks High tomorrow wouldn't be as easy as she had hoped.

Trying to forget her anxiety, Bella grabbed her notebook and started to draw, one of her favorite hobbies, and one for which she didn't have to think and almost didn't have to pay attention. She went into a sort of trance and allowed her fingers to take the lead and draw whatever her mind needed. Outside Bella's bedroom, the storm sang on.

On the other side of town a teenaged boy played with the keys of his piano. Edward Cullen wasn't interested in any melody in particular; he was looking for a distraction from the questions that nagged at him the last few days. Why did the nightmares stop? Why couldn't he remember them?

Edward ran his hand through his untamable mass of bronze tinged hair, a nervous habit that irritated his mother when he was younger. He knew he should feel grateful, and thank God and all his lucky stars that the dreams had decided to stop, but he couldn't. An irksome unease in the recesses of his mind pushed him to question the whys and hows of the nightmares now that they had vanished. _Why couldn't he have peace?_

"Edward?" he heard Alice call, his eternal accomplice, his best friend. He smiled, welcoming a distraction from his morose thoughts.

"Hi," he greeted Alice in a soft voice.

"What was that thing you were just playing?" Alice asked, sitting next to him on the piano bench.

"Huh?" was Edward's brilliant response.

"That melody," Alice said, pointing towards the keys as if the gesture would help Edward understand. "The one you were just playing when I interrupted you!" Alice huffed in exasperation at her cousin's cluelessness.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Alice! I was just toying around with the keys," Edward replied in confusion.

"No, you were playing this haunting melody. It was sort of happy and sweet in the beginning, then it morphed into something sad and reflective at the end. I know you hate audiences, Edward, but that song was amazing. You should share it with grandma."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Edward said, irritated by Alice's insistence as he slammed the piano cover shut.

Alice almost jumped out of her skin at Edward's sudden impatience. He almost never lost his temper, and he certainly never lost it with her. She had hoped that the abrupt reprieve from the nightmares would loosen him up. But Alice realized that Edward was as worked up now as he had been every day he was unceremoniously awoken by a nightmare.

"Excuse me! Exactly what happened for you to be in such _crabby_ mood?" Alice asked once she recovered from her initial shock. She was not the type to take any bullshit, especially from Edward, and she wasn't going to start now.

Edward sighed. He was agitated and tried to rein himself in. It was not Alice's fault that his lifelong feeling of uneasiness had not left with the dreams.

"Sorry, Alice. You're right to be mad at me. That was completely uncalled for."

Alice took a resigned lungful of air and turned to look at her friend, who had stood from the piano bench and was currently standing by the window, staring pensively through the glass.

"Seriously, Edward, what's going on? Why are you like this? I thought that with…you know…the dreams gone…" Alice said tentatively, "you'd be over the moon and composing new songs and…just be happy."

Edward continued to watch the rain fall. He couldn't explain to himself what was happening, let alone to his cousin.

"Edward?" Alice called. "Please talk to me."

He turned to look at his cousin, resting the back of his head on the cool glass of the window.

"I really don't know, Al. All I can tell you is that the peace I was expecting to feel is not there, I don't feel it. I feel on edge, as a matter of fact."

Alice groaned. This was not the cheerful Edward she expected. This was glum, business-as-usual Edward. She abandoned her seat, and walked towards her cousin. Edward smiled weakly at her and Alice tapped his temple with her pointer finger. "What's troubling you? What's going on inside that dungeon of yours? Explain it to me. I'm sure I can keep up."

Edward looked intently into Alice's eyes, trying to transmit with his gaze the feelings that raged inside. He breathed heavily and said, "Do you ever feel like you're forgetting something really, really important, that's imperative for you to remember, and you have it on the tip of your tongue, but it just doesn't come to you?"

Alice stared at her cousin, shocked at the knotty sentence. She tried to come up with an empathic, comforting answer but couldn't, and answered as truthfully as she could. "Honestly, I don't Edward. I've never felt like that, but don't freak-out, okay? It's only been a couple of days since the nightmares stopped, give it time."

Edward nodded and turned, defeated, to gaze at the rain, the one true constant in his life.

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**A/N** I know… it's short but I did warn you about it, I'm just getting warm.

My gratitude and appreciation to **Dante Levine** for enduring the often taxing task of correcting my originals, and **lemonmartinis**, and **Rhian0000** who do me the huge favor of reading the chapters ahead to calm my lovely self-deprecating mind. Also thank you to TazzsObsession who was kind enough to feature this story on the New Stories section of the twilight muses Blog ( http : / / thetwilightmuses . blogspot . com / )

I post Teasers on Wednesdays on my Blog, you're welcome to them if you wish. They are mostly visual, with a few phrases from the chapter. If you go and check the one I posted for this chapter you'll see what I mean.

If I need to post any pictures, etc., I will also post them on my Blog.

**http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com /**

I'm on Twitter as **ange_de_laube** if you want to follow, I usually tweet any important stuff there.

Thanks for taking the time to read.

Hopefully, see you next Sunday,

Ange

**PS.** Rhian0000 made me a Thread on Twilighted, you will be able to check out the Teasers there as well...

**http : / / www . twilighted . net / forum / viewtopic . php ? f = 44&t = 9957&p = 1019432 # p1019432**

Thank you Rhian0000, if you're looking for Canon with Citrus, check out her stories, she can write Canon like no other.

**http : / / www . fanfiction . net / u / 2099677 / Rhian0000**


	3. You

_I don't even feel like updating-I'm too depressed over "Master of the Universe" __final chapter-not because it was sad, but because it's over-but I am a woman of my word. This is a bittersweet day for many of us, so I feel I should dedicate this chapter to __**Snowqueens Icedragon**__, for creating a World in which I lost myself for months. She brought me to the lovely Bunker Babes, and thanks to her I formed new friendships, and met wonderful people. Thank you Icy,_

_**As always:**_There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

Okay, enough emoness…

**DISCLAIMER: some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 2: You**

"**Dreams are like stars...you may never touch them, but if you follow them they will lead you to your destiny."**

_Unknown_

A storm raged all night in Forks, as it often did, washing away all traces of human activity from the day before. This Monday morning was sunless, grey, and altogether normal. A light drizzle continuously fell from the thick clouds, reducing visibility and slowing the town's meager traffic.

Bella Swan sat next to her dad, Charlie, in their SUV. He was giving her a ride to school. She was nervous. After having met the Newtons on Saturday, there was no doubt she'd be the latest topic of teenage gossip.

When they finally arrived at the dreaded Forks High School, Bella noticed the individual buildings that made up the campus. _Who the hell thought it was a good idea to have separate buildings in a place as rainy as Forks?_ She was grateful that living in Seattle had taught her to always carry a raincoat.

"Bye, Daddy."

"Do you want me to go with you to the main office?" he asked before Bella could climb down from the seat and leave the car.

Bella would have loved to have her dad walk her around her new high school, protecting her from the gossip, but she was stubborn and preferred to do things on her own. She had had enough hovering from her mom to last a life time.

"Thanks, Dad, but I got it."

Charlie shot her a disbelieving look, but kept his mouth shut. He knew Bella was anxious, but he also understood why she wanted to do this herself.

"Okay, you have your schedule and the school map they emailed us, so you just have to go in there and they'll probably give you some sort of paper or slip for your teachers to sign," he smiled reassuringly at his daughter. "Good luck, sweetheart."

Bella shut the door and stood for a few minutes, staring at the retreating SUV. Finally, she sighed and gave into the inevitable, entering a building with the words _Main Office_ above a set of double doors. The space was warm and decorated with plastic plants. Bella didn't see the point of fake foliage when you could step outside and stumble on a whole lot of green. But she stopped questioning the town's standards for normal behavior two days ago.

Bella slowly approached a red-haired lady typing away on an ancient looking computer.

"Hi," she said tentatively, "I'm Isabella Swan."

"The new student," the lady stated.

"Yes."

"Okay, dear," the lady said, getting up from her chair and going through a pile of documents on a desk.

"Here you go," she handed Bella a blue slip of paper. "Have all your teachers sign this and bring it back to me at the end of the day. I'm Mrs. Cope. Anything you need, or any questions you have, come ask me. Okay?"

Bella was infinitely grateful that at least Mrs. Cope acted like a normal person. This was a good sign. She breathed a sigh of relief as she exited the office into the unknown that was Forks High.

She walked around for a bit, holding the campus map in front of her face, trying to get familiar with her surroundings, until she finally figured out a route that led straight to Building 3 for her first class. She stuffed the map inside her messenger bag, not wanting to make her newbie status any more obvious.

_"You can do this, no one is looking at you, just keep walking,"_ Bella chanted silently. When she noticed a few students staring, she increased her pace wanting to get to her destination as fast as her legs could get her there. _This was going to be a very long day_, she thought, feeling quite breathless, as she practically sprinted to class.

For Edward Cullen Forks High was an all too familiar hell. He was an outcast. Unlike his cousin Alice, who was a regular social butterfly, Edward didn't get along very well with the other students. He sat at the popular kids' table, thanks to Alice. But he wasn't part of the in crowd, or any crowd, for that matter. He was studious, serious, and uninterested in idle talk and silly topics like the latest teen hotties or fashion. He didn't care, and didn't pretend to.

What did bother Edward was the new obsession some female students had developed for him. It was as if overnight they discovered that he was secretly a prince of a European country and wouldn't leave him alone.

Edward hated attention, especially that kind. Sure, a few of the admirers were attractive—he wasn't blind—but most were so empty-headed; their chatter so inane that any physical allure was overshadowed by their flaws.

That morning, Edward was the first to exit his father's car. He knew the Mercedes drew unwanted attention and didn't want to linger.

Alice shot him an angry look as he ran to the shelter of a school building. Yes, Edward could be sweet and selfless, but he could also seem cold and rude in situations where he was uncomfortable. So to piss him off a little, Alice took her sweet time getting out of the car and saying goodbye to Edward's father, Carlisle.

By the time she joined her cousin, a big group of spectators had gathered to admire the beautiful and obviously expensive machine.

Edward sighed, resigned to the fact that most of them would surely ask him about the car during the day.

"Really Alice?" he complained, waving goodbye to his father. "Was that display necessary?"

Alice huffed and started to walk toward Building 3, then abruptly stopped. "You know Edward, if you take that stick out of your ass, one day you might find that making friends and being nice is not that hard." Without another word, she jerked the building doors open and headed to first period.

Incredulous, Edward stared at her back before angrily raking his hair with his fingers. Between embarrassing questions and silly, giggling, stalkers, he sensed this day was not going to be a good one. He jammed his hands into his pockets and stared at his sneakers, oblivious to the kids scrambling to get to class before the late bell.

Lost in thought, Edward bumped into someone –landing on top of that someone as they both fell to the floor.

The next few moments in Edward Cullen's life could be defined as supernatural. Time literally stopped as he stared down into the face of a girl. Brown endless pools gazed back, sending bolts of electricity through his body, yet calming him for the first time since he could remember.

Bella Swan stared at the boy that lay above her – first with shock – then with intrigue. She searched his forest green eyes and his flawless features with interest. Instead of being annoyed, she felt an awareness, as if a dormant part of her soul, an absence that had nagged at her consciousness her whole life, had _finally_ awakened.

A sense of recognition screamed through each mind: "_You!_"

Suddenly, all the little things that had seemed so important just seconds before didn't matter any longer.

The rain outside intensified, the wind howled making the tree leaves swirl in a wave of green, but neither Edward nor Bella noticed. Inside each psyche, the relentless countdown – _stopped_.

The _tick tock_ finally ended. There was only silence. There was only them.

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**A/N** I know my chapters are short, but I'm not a Native speaker of English, and this is the best I can do at the moment. I don't want to make you wait for a month for a 6000 words chapter, so I post weekly short chapters. I hope you are kind enough to have a bit of patience until I get my groove and can write in a more fluid manner.

As always, I want to thank my Betas (yes now is plural) **Dante Levine** and **Monamour**, they show me infinite kindness and patience…I can never thank you enough…

And my lovely pre-readers who advice me and hold my hand through this whole experience, my dear friends: **Rhian0000** and **lemommartinis**.

I wouldn't do this without you…

Rhian0000 started a Twilighted thread for this, you can find the link in my profile…I shall be posting teasers there as well as in my Blog…

Thanks for taking the time to read,

((Hugs))

Ange


	4. Sparks

**Quick A/N: **There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 3: Sparks**

"**When a heart is on fire, sparks always fly out of the mouth."**

_Proverb_

Alice Cullen walked towards class, annoyed at Edward's attitude. She couldn't understand his aversion to socializing. _Why couldn't he be nice and friendly to people? Why did he have to be so difficult? _Alice sighed, sure Edward would be a happier person if only he would give himself the chance to open up. Life would be easier if he had someone to talk to, maybe even a girlfriend to spend time with. Alice was sure all Edward needed to stop feeling so edgy were friends. After a few more steps, she came to an abrupt halt. Who was she kidding? Edward was like an oyster. He was clammed shut, never revealing his true inner beauty.

The only person he ever revealed himself to was her. And by shunning him she wasn't going to get anywhere. She needed to be his guide, push him out of his shell. If she gave up, who would he have left? With those thoughts, Alice turned and retraced her steps to where she left Edward. She wasn't going to apologize—not exactly—but she was going to show him that even though he was acting like an ass, being the bigger person was just as easy. She was going to walk with him to class like they did every day and be a good friend. Alice sighed again. _Being a nice thoughtful person was such hard work sometimes!_

When she stepped outside though, she encountered an unexpected but amusing situation: Edward and an unfamiliar girl, tangled in a heap on the ground. But as both Edward and the girl were completely paralyzed, lost in each other's gaze, a plan began to form in Alice's mind. _Um… so he likes this girl? Well, at least enough to ogle her_,she thought.

Meanwhile, Bella continued to stare at the unknown boy lying on top of her. _Who was he? Why did he look so familiar? His eyes… _She had seen those eyes before. Her head started to spin. The smell of this boy was slightly intoxicating and it made her dizzy.

Edward was in a similar condition. The girl lying under him looked so familiar. Her brown eyes were deep, endless pools of chocolate. The feelings brewing in him were startling. A sense of recognition and a strange dull ache in his chest made him feel light-headed. _Who are you?_ he wondered. He was about to ask that question out loud when the sound of a clearing throat made him stop.

"Um…Edward," he heard Alice's voice say. "Could you introduce me to your new friend?" Alice's teasing tone was enough to break the spell. He practically jumped off the girl with the agility of a cat.

How long had he been laying there? It must not have been more than a few seconds, but it seemed much longer.

Bella remained frozen on the wet floor. She couldn't make heads or tails of what had just happened. Why did she stay under this boy without moving a muscle?_ Who was he? Damn it!_ This wasn't like her at all! She wasn't one to melt over pretty boys!_ Wait… Did I just think he was pretty?_ Bella's jumbled thoughts distracted her enough to almost miss the hand offered by said pretty boy.

"Want help?" Edward said in a trembling voice. He was affected by this unknown girl, and these new feelings had shaken him deeply. He couldn't hide the trepidation in his voice.

In a knee-jerk reaction Bella took the proffered hand, completely entranced by the velvety voice of the boy who had knocked her to the floor. The tone was manly, soft and so incredibly lovely. _Just like the rest of him_, Bella thought. She immediately berated herself for having such thoughts about a boy she didn't know nor had any interest in knowing for that matter. However, neither Edward nor Bella were prepared for the electrical shock that ran through their bodies as soon as their skins made contact. When it happened, their hands flew apart, sending Bella stumbling back to the ground.

"Ow!" Bella yelped, hitting her head. Alice stifled a giggle. _This would be funny if it wasn't so ridiculous_, she thought. Alice was quick to help Bella up, asking several times if her head was fine. Whereas Edward stood in complete silence, asking himself what the hell had just happened.

Bella wondered that very same thing as she scrambled to her feet with Alice's help. Alice, on the other hand, was carefully studying Edward and Bella's expressions. _Um… this is very interesting_, she concluded.

"I'm so sorry," Alice began and then pointed to the motionless boy standing in front of them, "Edward here is known for living inside his head too much, he probably didn't even see you. I hope you didn't hurt yourself? I'm Alice by the way."

Bella blinked her stupor away and attempted to make sense of the girl's words. After a few seconds she was able to form a coherent response. "Yes… yes, I'm fine. Thank you, Alice," she finally replied.

Edward had so many questions for the mysterious, unknown girl he had accidentally knocked down. What was the source of the current he felt when he touched her? It wasn't normal. He had been shocked by his stereo once; it had left him with an unpleasant tingling sensation. This shock had left his entire skin buzzing, and surprisingly, he liked it. He craved the feeling. He was beyond creeped out by this discovery. What the hell was wrong with him?

His thoughts were cut short by the bell announcing that class was about to start.

Bella hastily said goodbye and ran towards the school building. She was too overwhelmed to be around this boy, and she didn't want to be late on her first day.

"So…" Alice drawled once Bella was out of sight. "It seems you finally met your match."

Edward turned to his cousin and gawked. For some reason Alice's words didn't register. _What did she mean? I've met my match? My match in what? _

"What?" he asked, dizzy with the feelings of the bizarre experience.

Alice patted his back. "Edward, I've always known you to be sort of dense, especially when it comes to matters of the opposite sex, but this…" she giggled. "This is just too much."

Alice walked towards the building doors. "Are you coming?" she asked her perplexed cousin.

"Yes," he quickly replied, and ran a bit to catch up with her.

-x-x-x-x-

Bella was quick to find her first class of the day. The teacher was already there, but he was sitting at his desk, ignoring the students that were still arriving and settling in their seats. She approached the teacher and introduced herself, handing him the slip she got from Mrs. Cope.

"Okay, Miss Swan, here you go," the teacher said, handing back the slip. "I'm Mr. Banner, and as you can guess I'll be your Biology teacher. This is a fairly easy class, but if you do well in it you will get credits that could help you get into my AP Biology class next year."

Bella nodded silently. She wasn't very interested in Biology. She didn't like the sight of blood and the idea of cutting open any creature, even an ugly frog, wasn't her idea of fun. Besides, she was still very much preoccupied with her recent encounter.

"Very good, now please take that empty seat at the back, the one on the right. It's the only empty seat I'm afraid," Mr. Banner said, signaling a seat at the last table at the very back of the room. He looked almost apologetic. _Strange… _Bella thought.

Bella walked to her seat and wondered who would be her lab partner. She could only hope it was not a bad-tempered person. She had a temper of her own, and didn't want to get into unnecessary verbal sparring.

Bella started sketching on her notebook while the rest of the students continued to arrive. She was so focused on the drawing—a beautiful meadow full of flowers she had dreamed the first night she spent at the new house—that she didn't hear the person next to her.

"Excuse me?" a now familiar velvety voice said.

"Crap!" Bella whispered as she turned to confirm her suspicions about the owner of the voice.

Just as she suspected, Edward, the boy with the intoxicating scent and electrified touch was going to be her partner. _Great! Just freaking fantastic!_

"Could you…um…move just a little bit so I can get to my seat?" Edward said in a tentative voice. He knew this was going to be a bad day – after he walked into class to find the usually empty seat next to him occupied by none other than _Unknown Brunette_ – he was convinced of that fact.

"Yes, of course…" Unknown Brunette was quick to respond. But in her haste to get up from her seat and allow him to pass she tripped against the foot of the table and started to fall.

Bella prepared herself for the impending pain from yet another tumble when she felt two strong arms stopping her fall and grabbing her torso delicately but with precision. She was immediately lost in the feelings coursing through her body: warmth, familiarity, nostalgia, even a tinge of sadness. How could she feel so much in a simple innocent touch?

Edward was just as befuddled as Bella, but his annoyance at Unknown Brunette's total lack of coordination was almost winning out over his confusion. _Did she have any concern about her well-being at all? Did she enjoy falling to the ground twenty-four-seven? She couldn't seriously be this clumsy! _However, Edward couldn't completely deny the sense of rightness that filled his soul as soon as _she_ was in his arms. It was the same feeling of recognition he felt when they stumbled to the floor together a few minutes ago. He felt like he knew her, like he had been waiting to know her his entire life. Which didn't mean he wasn't tempted to drape her in bubble wrap to make sure her clumsiness didn't cost her an eye. Edward righted Bella on her seat as fast as he could. The more time he spent around her, touching her, the more confused he felt. He had enough confusion in his life. He didn't need more.

Bella sighed, almost in relief, as soon as Edward released her and whispered a thank you. She could feel the heat crawling to her cheeks and guessed she was probably puce by now. Suddenly, she heard a sharp intake of breath from _Electric Boy_. _Why was he breathing like that?_

She tentatively turned to steal a glance, using her hair as camouflage, trying to seem interested in what the teacher scribbled on the board. He looked down, seemingly entranced by the table and the doodles students in previous years had left behind. _Odd!_ she thought.

Edward felt a strange compulsion to caress Unknown Brunette'scheeks as they turned that lovely pinkish color. He focused on the table, unsure he would be able to stop himself if he actually looked at her._ Really Edward!_ he scolded himself. _You never so much as blink when girls shamelessly flirt with you and this unknown new girl has the power to turn you into a statue! Get yourself together!_

The teacher interrupted both teens' reveries by starting the class. Edward groaned in exasperation when Mr. Banner said that they would be assigned as lab partners according to their seating arrangements. Bella wasn't much happier with the news.

_Great, just great… I'm so going to screw up and end up touching her and freaking her out_, Edward thought.

_Oh God! I know that I'll end up tripping and landing on top of him again. Or worse I'll sniff him and he'll think I'm a freak! _Bella predicted sadly.

Edward and Bella spent the rest of the period in awkward silence until they were forced to interact due to the day's lab.

"Since it's only the first day," Mr. Banner announced, "I don't want to scare any of you off. So today we'll learn how to use a microscope."

Both Edward and Bella groaned, along with a few other students. This was something they had already covered or seen in other science classes, and the idea of repeating such a mind-numbing lesson wasn't appealing in the slightest.

"As you'll notice," Mr. Banner continued, ignoring the glum faces of the majority of his students, "there are nine main parts in a microscope: the eyepiece, the objective lens, the…"

As Mr. Banner continued with the explanation of how to properly prepare a sample slide and how to observe the slide with the aid of the microscope a student proceeded to distribute prepared slides for the lab.

When the blonde-haired student reached Bella and Edward's table Bella immediately recognized him as the Newton kid. _What was his name? It started with M… Matthew, Marcus, __Malcolm__?_ Bella inwardly shrugged, not really caring about the name of the annoying boy. She had no interest in being his friend. He, however, smiled broadly at Bella and handed her the slides making his hand linger in hers just a moment too long.

Edward had to suppress the urge to growl at Mike Newton. He never liked the guy, and now for some reason he couldn't bear his presence. He realized he felt oddly protective of Bella and knowing Newton's reputation he knew he was bad company for such a timid girl.

"Thank you." Bella flushed furiously. She was embarrassed and irritated by the Newton boy's attentions. _What the hell is his problem?_

Edward felt a frisson of anger when Mike's smile broadened at Bella's involuntary reaction. He could clearly see she was annoyed by his presence. Why couldn't Newton see it, too?

"Thank you, Newton. Now get lost," Edward barked.

Mike glared at Edward but didn't hesitate to return to his seat at the front of the class. He didn't want to get in trouble.

Bella turned and glowered at Edward. She didn't like Newton but that was no way to treat a person.

"What?" Edward asked. He had never been intimidated by anyone but Alice, but this girl's glare was equally if not more powerful than his cousin's.

"I don't know," Bella began, "maybe the fact that you almost chewed his head off? What did he ever do to you?"

"Oh come on! You were bothered by him just as much as I was!" Edward retorted. He wasn't going to back down, even though he knew it wasn't right to treat Mike as he did.

Bella huffed and turned back to the slides. She knew he was right, but was stubborn enough not to agree or thank him for his intervention. Besides, she couldn't look at him for long. He made her want to blush, and stutter, like an infatuated fan-girl. God, she hated that feeling.

"Okay, kids, I want you to put each slide on the microscope stage, in the very center under the stage's glass circle..." Mr. Banner continued with his instructions.

Bella took a peek at the slide first since she was the closest to the microscope. It was the wing of a butterfly and she immediately recognized it. She wrote it down on her lab sheet and pushed the microscope towards Edward without looking at him.

Edward felt a bit hurt by his mysterious lab partner's indifference, but he couldn't quite comprehend why. He didn't even know her name, how could he feel hurt by her coldness? He pretended not to care. After all, if there was one thing all the years of hiding his nightmares from his parents had taught him it was to mask his feelings flawlessly.

He too took a peek at the slide under the microscope, and rapidly realized he was looking at a butterfly's wings. For some reason, before he could stop himself, he said aloud a favorite quote, "I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man."

Bella blinked, shocked at Edward's words. She didn't know many fifteen-year olds that could quote Eastern philosophy. Like Edward, she said the name of the author before she could stop herself. "Chuang Tzu."

Edward was just as amazed to discover that his new lab partner wasn't another vapid teenage girl with a head full of celebrity gossip or the latest episode of one of MTV's reality shows. This girl was deep. Edward liked that very much and he smiled a lopsided grin, happy to learn a new piece of information about the mysterious girl who had stirred so much confusion within him.

Edward's smirk had an unexpected effect. Bella was completely blown away by it to the point that, in hindsight, she would swear her brain stopped working altogether. After a few moments of stunned silence, Bella had enough presence of mind to utter a word and break away from her shameless gawking at Edward's hypnotizing grin.

"Um… how did you know that quote?" she asked shyly.

Bella's nervous voice had a similar effect on Edward. _It's so sweet and soft_, Edward thought, _I like it when she uses that tone with me. _

"Er…" Edward cleared his throat before responding, "I like reading a lot, especially Philosophy and poetry." He was a bit scared this might put his lab partner off, but didn't understand why he even cared if she thought he was weird for liking books so much.

"If I commit suicide, it will not be to destroy myself but to put myself back together again," Bella blurted at Edward's confession, again without giving much thought to what she quoted before it came out of her lips. She seemed to lose her brain-to-mouth filter around this boy – a situation she found unsettling and liberating. She was about to apologize, because taken out of context that phrase made her sound suicidal, when Edward interrupted.

"Antonin Artaud." Edward immediately recognized the author much to Bella's surprise. "So you prefer western authors with a twist of madness?" Edward inquired.

"Artaud wasn't mad! He was just more lucid than the authorities at the time!" Bella defended.

"Okay, okay… I happen to agree," Edward was quick to add. "I was just teasing."

Bella sighed heavily, annoyed that she was so easy to rile. Finally, she calmed herself and giggled at the ludicrous conversation they were having without even introducing themselves properly. Their earlier disastrous encounter did not count.

"I'm Bella Swan," she said, extending her hand in greeting.

"Edward Cullen," Edward replied with a smile, happy to put a name to his mysterious new lab partner. He swiftly extended his hand and took Bella's.

They were both zapped as soon as their skins touched. They had forgotten the effect that came about with such contact. They hastily took their hands back and smiled sheepishly, embarrassed.

_Will I always feel that tingling current when we touch?_ Bella wondered.

"Nice to meet you," Bella said.

"Likewise," Edward agreed.

The class continued with shy looks and passing comments as two old souls, trapped inside two very young bodies, came to know each other as much as Mr. Banner's first period Biology class allowed.

All in Forks followed its usual course. The rain carried on its mating dance with the Olympic greenery, the skies remained as grey and dark as they always were, and the waves of the Pacific kissed the La Push shores as they have done since the dawn of time.

But the world had changed for Edward and Bella, and they weren't even aware of what fate had in store for them.

* * *

**A/N** I have to say YAY! ***fistpump*** this update almost didn't happen, but against all odds, against lost luggage, against Thunder storms, it did happen.

I have to thank **Dante Levine** who in the middle of her business trip, and having lost her luggage still Beta'd for me. **Monamour**, because her computer died, and she went to work **on a Sunday** to send me her corrections. **Rhian0000**, who I kept awake until a few minutes ago, she lives in Europe so she was up pretty late for me. And last but not least, **lemonmartinis**, for being an amazing person and the best pre-reader an author could ask for. *sniffles*

I know I have been **#ReviewReplyFail** this week, but it has been a hectic week, and I thought you'd prefer an update ;)

I hope I wasn't wrong. Thank you so much for all your reviews, I never thought my story would make it to 100.

**A couple of recs, from first time writers...**

**An Angel Closes Her Eyes**** by ****tg10781**

_Bella moves to a new town, to escape a past filled with immeasurable pain. Edward returns home from Iraq, to step into his position as fulltime single father. Together with his family and friends, can Edward help Bella get past the guilt, and heal? AH_

**Fill My Little World**** by ****Hongkongphooey**

_Bella Swan is content with her life. With her work, hobby and friends all keeping her busy she has no time for anything else. Until one day she agrees to do a favour for a friend. Her quiet world is about to be turned upon its head. AH set in England_

**Illumination: Edward's Meadow**** by Rhian0000**

_"Today she would see a new side of me; today I would be honest – I owed her that. I would let her see me for what I am, even if it would take her away from me." Twilight's Meadow scene from Edward's point of view. Covering the whole day in three parts._

Thanks for taking the time to read,

**((love))**

Ange

*Ange runs to watch MTV Movie awards AGAIN*


	5. WTH

**Quick A/N: **There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 4: WTH**

_"Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while." _

_**The Princess Bride**_

Bella unconsciously stared out the window. Some would assume she was simply bored out of her mind – she was sitting in Calculus after all – but actually she was trying to process what had happened earlier in first period Biology.

She had never before felt the way she did when she was around Edward.

Never had she wanted so badly for time to stand still. Then she could stare endlessly into Edward's deep green eyes, completely mesmerized. She wasn't usually a big fan of green, but now even looking at the green of the trees through the window made her face heat up and become quite flushed.

Bella was slightly appalled by her own behavior. She had never acted so… so… _fifteen_! Her mom used to tease her, saying she acted more like a 35-year-old woman than a teenage girl. No one would be fooled into thinking she was older if they saw her in the presence of Edward. She stuttered, blushed, tripped… God! She was pretty sure at one point she had even batted her eyelashes at him! What the hell was wrong with her? She had asked herself that question several times already, and it wasn't even lunchtime yet.

In spite of being annoyed by her own ridiculous behavior, Bella couldn't help but smile when she remembered that Edward appeared just as flustered. _Does he feel it too?_ she wondered. _I sure hope he does. _She wasn't exactly sure what she was feeling, but she sure as hell didn't want to be the only one. For some reason the idea that Edward might not feel the same way made her heart clench and her throat go dry. Just the possibility he might not reciprocate whatever this was made her despair.

Bella had never been so confused.

She was so focused on the repetitive fall of the rain that she didn't realize someone had sat down next to her.

"Hi," she heard a familiar voice say. Bella sighed in relief. It wasn't the smooth voice that tinted her face fifty shades of red.

She turned and was immediately greeted by Alice's smiling face – or at least she thought her name was Alice. She hadn't been exactly coherent when the girl introduced herself earlier.

"Hi," Bella replied, giving her a genuine smile in return. She liked Alice in the same inexplicable way that she liked Edward, although it took on two very different forms. Bella once again blushed at her thoughts. She was doing that a lot.

Alice grinned like a Cheshire cat. She really liked this girl, and Alice had always been a good judge of character. _This girl is perfect for Edward, _exactly_ what he needs_, she thought. _Now, I just need to make the two of them see it as well. _

"You never did tell me your name," Alice said after a few seconds of awkward silence.

"Um… I'm Bella Swan," she answered in a low voice. Although she'd been asked that a lot today, a number of students seemed to know her name already. She suspected the nosy neighbors that visited on moving day had spread the news around town.

"Alice Cullen, nice to meet you." Alice offered her hand to Bella. Bella shook it and smiled. _Hmm… no current_, Bella thought. Both Alice and Edward seemed like perfectly normal people. Well, except for the fact that Edward seemed to be charged with electricity.

"I hope your head isn't hurting after the bump you suffered this morning," Alice said, trying to strike up a conversation. She had learned from Jessica Stanley – Forks High unofficial gossip extraordinaire – that Bella had moved to Forks with her family only two days ago, and that they lived in the old Dwyer house. However, if she wanted the _'let's get Edward a girl'_ operation to be a success she needed more info.

Bella shook her head and groaned. She wasn't exactly pleased with the way she had met Edward and Alice.

Alice, sensing Bella's embarrassment, whispered, "Don't feel bad. If anything that was the most memorable first impression anyone has ever made on Edward."

Bella started to fidget at the mere mention of Edward's name, the only boy to ever turn her world upside down. Only yesterday Bella had been delighting in how her life would be so dull now that the dreams had ended, and her only worry was the first day of class at a new school. But once again, she found herself plagued with uncertainty, although the butterflies in her stomach felt sort of… _nice_.

Alice, being a sensitive soul, once again read Bella's reactions as further proof she was right. She felt exactly the same way Edward did. _This plan will work… I'm sure of it!_ Alice thought, now confident in her decision.

"So…" Alice asked, putting her scheme in motion. "Why did you move here – if you don't mind me asking?"

Bella was more than happy to leave all talk of Edward behind. Yes, she liked him; yes, she had been friendly to him; but she certainly wasn't ready to talk about him. She still needed to consider her own feelings and come to terms with the bizarre nature of what had occurred.

"It was mainly because of me," Bella replied, as she briefly considered telling Alice the truth. It was her psychologist who suggested a change of environment and though she inexplicably trusted Alice, she simply wasn't quite ready to discuss that or Edward.

"My mom says she thinks a small town makes a better place to raise a teenager." Bella shrugged. "In reality, my mom never liked city life."

Not wanting to draw attention to herself, since she already risked getting in trouble for switching seats during class, Alice giggled silently as she thought about how mistaken Bella's mom was. It's true Forks was a very boring town, but it was that very boredom which often led some of its teenage residents to engage in R-rated activities long before any city kid would.

"What?" Bella asked, frowning a bit in confusion. She didn't think there was anything funny with what she had said.

"Nothing, I just thought of something funny," Alice was quick to deflect, "Um… so do you like Forks so far?"

"I do. It's not much different from Seattle – maybe a bit greener and with a few less stores," Bella shrugged. "Although I must confess I was a bit scared coming to class today. The few people I met while we were moving in were a bit…" Bella hesitated. She didn't want to offend Alice by saying that before meeting her and Edward she had thought Forks' population was, at best, insane.

"Gossipy? Nosy? Not right in the head?" Alice offered.

Bella was stunned by Alice's candor. She didn't seem to think very highly of her neighbors. Bella could only nod in agreement.

Alice smiled reassuringly. "Excuse my bluntness. Edward says I have a big mouth. In time you'll form your own opinion about the town."

"Is Edward your brother?" Bella blurted out without thinking. She desperately wanted to know more about him.

Alice's eyes twinkled. She was right; Bella was infatuated with Edward. She did a mental happy dance before responding. "Nope. I always say he's my cousin to everyone who asks, but in reality my dad is Edward's adoptive brother. So technically you could say he's my uncle."

"Edward is your uncle?" Bella was puzzled.

"Yep, my dad's mom died of cancer when he was like two, and her best friend adopted him after his dad became too depressed to take care of him. This was long before Edward was even born. I'm actually a couple of weeks older than Edward, so it seems kind of stupid to call him Uncle Edward. So I just tell everybody he's my cousin," Alice replied.

"Oh…" Bella nodded. "Well, you're right. It would be sort of odd to call him Uncle if he's actually younger than you."

Their conversation was interrupted by the bell announcing the end of class. Bella started to pick up her things, surprised at how fast the period passed while talking with Alice. She already knew that she liked her, and could see that quite possibly they would become very good friends.

Alice waited and walked with Bella to the cafeteria for lunch. Alice was very friendly and had just about talked Bella's ear off planning movie nights, sleepovers, and shopping trips for the two of them. It was as if she had a bit too much caffeine and just couldn't stop talking. Normally Bella would have found someone like Alice extremely annoying, but for some reason she found her enthusiasm rather amusing.

When they reached the cafeteria door, Bella suddenly stopped. It was like the air was charged with a different vibe. She could feel goose bumps covering her arms, and the hair on the back of her neck stood up as if it sensed a dark presence. She turned around to see if someone was looking in her direction, but couldn't pinpoint anything out-of-the-ordinary.

Alice was about to ask Bella what was wrong when she saw Edward across the hall. He seemed to be having an argument with himself, and Alice could guess what it was about. _Bella_. He probably wanted to approach her but felt awkward with Alice there.

"Look! Edward's here," Alice pointed at him, shaking Bella out of her frightened daze. Bella turned to look and the moment she caught sight of Edward her whole body became engulfed with a buzzing sensation, the previous chill replaced by a warmth that started within and seemed to seep out of her every pore.

As their eyes met across the hall, Bella felt her body switch to automatic and she began walking towards Edward.

Edward found that he was experiencing a similar feeling. He itched to be closer to Bella. All the reservations which made him stop when he saw her talking to Alice seemed to disappear the moment their eyes connected.

He felt an almost unbearable urge to walk to her, pick her up in his arms, and breathe in her scent. _Where did all this intensity come from?_ He couldn't possibly feel this strongly about someone he had only met a few hours ago. But he did. Throughout Biology he had to repeatedly stop himself from doing what his body commanded: caress Bella's flushed cheeks; hold her hands; draw circles on her palms; kiss every knuckle; then… kiss… He couldn't let himself think about Bella's lips.

Without realizing it, they were soon standing face-to-face, only inches apart.

Earlier that day, Alice had sensed some sort of attraction between Edward and Bella; but now it was so intense she could almost see the pull that brought them closer. They behaved like magnets, drawn to one another by an unstoppable force. Alice felt like an intruder.

"Hi," Bella breathed.

"Hi," Edward replied in a soft tone.

They remained silent, lost in each other's presence. They were so captivated Alice had to scream their names to bring them back from whatever cloud they floated on.

"Earth to Edward and Bella!" Alice said, waving her hand between their faces, breaking their eye contact and the enchanted spell.

Both Edward and Bella blinked and simultaneously looked anywhere but at each other. They once again found themselves embarrassed by their complete lack of control over their actions.

"Come on!" Alice grabbed both Edward and Bella's hands in hers and dragged them to the cafeteria. "The food won't wait until you two are finished making goo-goo eyes at each other."

-x-x-x-x-

Edward couldn't honestly think back to a time in his life when he had been happier. This last week he had gotten to know Bella.

He now knew she was trying to learn French, and that she loved poetry and Jane Austen books. She had a strange fascination with _Wuthering Heights_ and had read it hundreds of times. When he asked her why she was so fond of Heathcliff and Catherine's romance, she answered, "Because no matter how much they hurt each other, or how many times they drifted apart, nothing – not even death – could keep them apart. Their love was that strong."

He could see the logic behind Bella's statement; but when he tried to put himself in Heathcliff's shoes, he simply could not comprehend anyone being that spiteful to the woman he supposedly loved.

They spent every day talking during Biology and lunch. The seat next to Edward's had become Bella's. They would slip into their own little world, completely ignoring everything and everyone around them.

Alice had even nicknamed lunch break _Edward and Bella's Bubble Time._

Edward didn't really care what anyone else thought and he knew Alice was more than happy to see him bonding with someone other than her. He could see it in the way her eyes sparkled with happiness whenever she stole a glance at the two of them talking. As a matter of fact, Alice hinted that Edward should officially ask Bella to be more than friends.

Edward had been opposed to the idea, stating that a week was too soon to ask a question like that. Alice had argued that if he allowed too much time to pass, someone else would ask Bella out. She had even tried to make Edward jealous by hinting that Mike Newton had asked her what Bella would think about going out with him.

This is how Edward found himself seated between Alice and Bella, watching _Mean Girls_, on Friday night.

He had grown more and more anxious over Alice's comment about Newton's possible invitation, and had invited Bella for a movie night at his cousin's. While Alice had made it clear what a stubborn jackass she thought he was being, she agreed to go along with his story: that movie night was all Alice's idea. Of course, she only agreed as long as she got to pick the movie. _Big fucking mistake!_

He was thrilled when the credits started to roll. Sitting through that movie had been almost as bad as going to the dentist.

Once the movie ended, Bella sighed in relief as well. She didn't find that sort of movie particularly appealing. Sure it was funny; but when Edward had proposed a movie night, she had pictured a more romantic movie – _and a bit less Alice_.

She immediately felt guilty for having such thoughts. Alice had been nothing but nice to her during the last week, but she couldn't help wanting to be alone with Edward.

_This is going to be a long night_, Bella decided while she helped Alice and Edward clean up their snacks and sodas. She had agreed to spend the night at Alice's since they'd probably watch movies until really late. Edward had agreed to spend the night as well, although he would be sleeping in the guest room.

Bella's mind drifted at the thought of having Edward sleeping so close. She imagined how he looked in his sleep; his perfect face as he slept soundly, his eyes fluttering while he dreamed. _Did he dream of her as she dreamed of him?_ Bella's recent dreams had all featured Edward. Mostly they were of him taking her to the beach, to a secluded cove near some cliffs, where they would kiss, and…

"Bella… Bella!" Alice called as she snapped her fingers in front of Bella's face. "Return to the world of the living, please."

"Um… What?" Bella mumbled.

Alice laughed and shook her head. "You have been drying that plate for the last ten minutes, Bella. I think it's dry enough."

Bella lowered her gaze to the plate and quickly placed it on the counter, blushing furiously. She had lost herself once again in her Edward daydreams and had completely forgotten about the outside world.

"Girls, time for bed!" Alice's mom, Tanya, yelled from the living room.

Alice's mom was very beautiful and didn't look a day over thirty. When Alice introduced them, Bella thought she was joking. Tanya was tall and blonde, had the body of a supermodel, while being both graceful and polite.

Alice was stunning as well, but with her long, brown hair, she looked nothing like Tanya. Seeing the questions in Bella's eyes as she looked from her to Tanya and back again, Alice explained that her dad, Jacob, was half Native American, and had straight, almost black hair just like Alice. Her dad was away on a fishing trip with Edward's dad, so Bella hadn't met him, but with a wife like Tanya and a daughter like Alice, Bella couldn't imagine Jacob being anything but gorgeous.

"Okay, let's go up to my room for some girl-time," Alice giggled while guiding Bella upstairs.

Edward had already retired to his room for the night, babbling some excuse about a book he had to read for English by Monday.

A very strong thunderstorm was brewing and Bella could hear the wind howling outside, like a lament for a long lost love. She shivered, and gathered her pajamas and toiletries to change in the bathroom.

Once she was ready for bed, Alice persuaded Bella to play Wii for a little while. Bella's lack of coordination proved to be a bit too much, and Alice announced after thirty minutes of Bella tripping over her own two feet – that they should probably call it a night. Besides the storm was picking up and they could be left without power at any minute.

Bella laid on the air-mattress next to Alice's bed, listening to the storm and imaging Edward in the next room… His tousled bronze locks shining with every lightning strike illuminating the night sky… His eyes closed and his beautiful mouth curved into a slight smile. She imagined him thinking of her, as he too listened to the unrelenting rain hammering the roof. Little did she know that was exactly what Edward was doing too.

As Edward lay there listening to the rain, he could just make out the swaying weeping willow outside his window, through the heavy curtains his Aunt Tanya had hung. He thought of Bella sleeping in the room right next door, with only a wall between them. He imagined her hair draped across her pillow. The beautiful long tresses he had inconspicuously stroked a few times when she was near. _So soft…_ was his last conscious thought before sleep took over.

-x-x-x-x-

Alice had fallen to sleep quickly, amused at how Edward and Bella had acted all night. How they peeked at each other throughout the movie. How Edward had vanished as soon as the words "let's all go to my room and play Wii" had left Alice's mouth. She had wanted to force more interaction between them, away from Mike's leering and Jessica's gossiping. She thought maybe all they needed was to acknowledge their attraction and realize it was more than just friendship. Eventually, after discovering she should be playing chess and not Wii with Bella, she had given up and headed off to bed.

Alice dreamed of a trip she and her mom had taken to New York, of the amazing time she had at Neiman Marcus, when she was awakened by a whimper coming from the other room.

She immediately recognized the sound and almost jumped from her bed, momentarily forgetting her guest. But Bella was fast asleep and completely unaware of Alice tiptoeing out of the room.

Before Alice made it two steps out her door, Edward's voice went from low disgruntled moans to full out cries. He was screaming. Never before had he screamed during his nightmares.

Alice's blood chilled when Edward screamed in agony, calling for someone named Marie.

"Marie!" Edward cried out in anguish.

_Who is Marie? I thought he liked Bella? What is going on with him?_ Alice wondered.

Just as she was about to turn the knob and enter Edward's room to quiet him, she heard a scream coming from her room.

"Anthony!" Bella cried.

"What the hell?" Alice hissed, just as lightning lit up the night and the power went out.

* * *

**A/N **as always a big Emmet bear hug to my Betas-**Dante Levine **and **Monamour**- and my pre-readers –**Rhian0000** and **lemonmartinis**. I'd be lost without you *squishes her friends in a hug*

Also, a big hug to the people who read and the people who reviewed, I'm slowly getting my review replies done, I may not be a _hare_ but even as a _turtle_, I'll get to the finish line *winks*

I have a Twilighted thread where I post Teasers, if you like to stop by I won't get mad *bats eyelashes*

I also post links to teasers, and/or when I post, on Twitter, I'm there as **ange_de_laube**, you don't have to follow me since my tweets aren't locked, but you might want to stalk my twitter page for updates *shrugs*

As you may have noticed the next chapters will be important. I'll try to update Sunday, but I just started the chapter yesterday, so between Betaing, pre-reading, etc, I'm not sure I'll get it done in 7 days, if not, be sure I'll upload as soon as I do.

Okay, have a fun week and thanks for reading,

*air kisses*

Ange


	6. Wounds of the Past

**Quick A/N: **There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 5: Wounds of the Past**

**"Love hurts, Love scars, Love wounds and mars  
Any heart not tough or strong enough  
To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain  
Love is like a cloud, it holds a lot of rain  
Love hurts." **

_Lyrics "Love hurts" Nazareth version_

"Wait!" Bella heard herself yell.

Only it wasn't her voice. She was standing in an empty street and someone was walking in front of her.

"For what exactly?" a male voice responded angrily, though Bella could also detect the underlying pain there as well. She looked in the direction of the voice and found herself face-to-face with a pair of mesmerizing forest-green eyes—the exact green eyes that had held her spellbound all week… _But why were they on the wrong face?_

"I'm waiting, Marie," the boy snapped, bitterness tainting his tone. "What I don't know is why. Why should I wait? Why should I care?"

Bella was profoundly confused. Who was this boy? Why was he calling her by her middle name? Why did he seem to know her? And most of all why did she have these deep, intense emotions coursing through her for someone she didn't know?

"I still love you," Bella heard her new voice answer him in barely a whisper.

The boy turned away in response to her words, causing her heart to crack. Before Bella could comprehend the pain, the boy abruptly turned to face her once more, and in a small trembling voice, he replied, "I still love you, too."

Bella felt her breaking heart suddenly swell with joy. She was stunned; the feeling was overwhelming, as though happiness had been missing from her life for so long it was foreign.

"It's irrelevant," the boy with Edward's captivating green eyes continued. "No matter how much we love each other, all we ever seem to do is hurt one another. At this rate we'll end up killing each other. Is that really what you want, Marie?"

"No," Bella heard herself reply meekly. Then she saw a hand she did not recognize – though obviously attached to her body – reach out and grab the boy's hand. "But this year apart nearly killed me, Anthony. Please…" she begged, squeezing the boy's hand in hers. "A life without you is no life at all."

Bella could feel herself holding back the tears trying so desperately to escape her eyes. But she refused to blink. As long as she didn't, nothing she feared would come true. Even in the unfamiliar mind which Bella found herself, she knew two things: if she blinked the tears would come, and if she blinked the boy, whose hand she now held, would disappear. She could not return to feeling dead inside. The boy's confession had ignited a spark she thought had long since died, and to have it extinguished now would be like dying a second death. Instead, she concentrated on the fact that he loved her still – she could work with that.

The boy's green eyes darkened and filled with unshed tears at Bella's admission. Sighing deeply, he began to pull away from her grasp, struggling slightly against her feeble attempts to maintain her hold. The moment he broke free, she knew it was the end. She had lost, and she had lost him.

Once Anthony had moved a few steps away, he squared his shoulders and stared at her with such contempt it chilled Bella's very soul. There was no denying it; this boy hated her just as much as he loved her.

"Really?" the boy spat at her, enraged. Bella's body flinched from the depth of the hatred in his voice. "So you drinking with _him_, partying with _him_, doing drugs with _him,_" he paused, fisting his hands in his hair, gritting his teeth before continuing. "Fu-fucking _him_ and doing God only knows what else with _him_ over this last year was what? You in Heaven, or you in Hell? Since you now tell me that you were dead and had no life without me." Unable to sustain his harsh composure, the boy's voice broke slightly with his final words, causing Bella to finally spill the tears she could no longer contain.

"Anthony," she whispered, her voice quivering, incapable of forming words.

"No," the boy growled, "now you're going to listen to me. I'm sick and tired of being your doormat, of being a joke in this pitiful town. '_Oh poor Anthony, his only girlfriend was screwing some other guy behind his back,'_" he said, making air quotes to emphasize the hurtful words.

"I'm tired of the gossip; I'm tired of you following me around; and I'm tired of you asking for forgiveness. I have no strength left to even look at you without feeling like my heart is being ripped from my chest. I'm tired of this game we've played ever since I came back. Yes! God help me!" The boy roared, articulating every syllable as if uttering the words caused him actual physical pain. "I still love you! But I won't continue to allow you to do the same things to me over and over again. We all have our limits, Marie. And I have reached mine."

Bella's whole body trembled at his words and the chill crawling up her spine left her numb in its powerful wake. She felt ashamed, although she knew nothing of what the boy accused her of doing and she had no idea who the _him _was. Yet she still knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he was telling the truth; she had done those things. She began to weep.

She cried for the love she had so recklessly destroyed, and for the beautiful, loving boy she had turned into the hard, bitter man who now stood before her. She also sobbed over her own blackened soul and how she tainted the souls of those foolish enough to love her.

At that moment, as she spiraled into despair, his hand caressed her cheek. His touch was her lifeline; it was what she craved. Though, Bella herself didn't know who he was, her heart and soul recognized his. Bella looked up at him through her swollen eyes, and even in the pouring rain, she could see that he, too, was crying.

He grabbed her by the arms, pulling her into his chest. He hugged her with all his might, while burying his nose into her wet hair. In an instant, Bella found her senses were overwhelmed by Edward's familiar scent. They both stood clutching one another as if they were drowning, hoping the other would save them.

"Please, stop this downward spiral. I can't save you if you don't want to be saved," the boy pleaded, caressing her face. He stared straight into her eyes, looking for an answer to some unspoken question. After a few moments he retreated, and with those few steps she could feel the icicles return to her heart.

"I can't do this anymore," he breathed barely above a whisper. But Bella caught his words, and felt as though she was at last frozen solid.

"Take care of yourself, _mon amour_," the boy said with a bit more strength. Bella smiled, momentarily forgetting the severity of their situation. Her icy heart thawed slightly at his use of the endearment, a pet name he had given her in a much happier time.

"Goodbye," the boy finally spoke in a broken voice, "this will be the last time you ever see me, but know I will always love you." With those words he turned and left Bella standing in the rain. She fell to her knees on the wet pavement, utterly desolate, her only companion the street lights and the occasional lightning that illuminated the dark sky.

Bella heard her voice, hoarse from crying, scream, "Anthony!"

**-x-x-x-x-**

Edward wasn't sure where he was. His heart and his mind were in such turmoil and he had no control over this body. He knew he had just left that brown-eyed girl sobbing in the street, but he didn't know who she was or why it made him feel as though he wanted to die.

He could feel a hole forming in his chest—one he himself had caused when he walked away from the beautiful brunette that smelled like Bella. He knew this was not the first time he had walked away, but he knew this would be the last. Something in this chaotic mind told him he would not come back, even if it killed him to stay away.

He could hear the girl's sobbing voice, calling him, begging him to come back to her, and it tore his soul even further. Edward felt as though he were fighting every instinct to continue walking away. He knew all he truly wanted was to be with her.

His strength was rapidly being depleted by the battling forces within. One part wanted to give up and go to her, while the other part knew that if he did she would break his heart all over again. He didn't trust her – that much Edward knew – even though he didn't know exactly why. Without trust love isn't enough.

He was so exhausted by his inner conflict he collapsed, clutching his body in pain as he fell to the sidewalk. Edward could hear his voice, foreign to his own ears, howling in anguish, a pain that could never be soothed and burned at his heart.

It had but one name. "Marie!" he heard himself scream.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Tanya was awoken by two screaming voices. The fog of sleep kept her from understanding the words at first. But as the veil lifted from her mind, she heard two names she hadn't heard said aloud together in almost 16 years.

"Marie!" she heard Edward yell.

"Anthony!" she heard Bella wail. Her skin prickled at the mention of those names. To preserve her peace of mind, she had long ago blocked them from her memory.

Hastily she grabbed her robe and a flashlight from the nightstand and ran for the door. As her trembling hands reached for the handle those painful, long forgotten memories rushed back, flashing through her mind, freezing her in place.

It was her daughter's voice that broke through and released her from the prison of the past.

"Mom!" she heard Alice call in a desperate tone.

Tanya blinked and shook her head slightly, disconnecting from the haze of the past, and ran to the aid of her only daughter.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Alice was frantic; she had never seen Edward's nightmares so intense. But before she could get to him and bring him back from his anguished state, she found herself standing in complete darkness, with two people she cared about both needing her help. She called out for her mother.

A few moments later, her mom appeared in the hallway, holding a flashlight and walking swiftly to where Alice stood in front of their guest room.

"What's going on?" Tanya asked worriedly.

"Edward and Bella are having nightmares. Please mom, go check on Bella. I'll go see Edward, he needs me," Alice beseeched.

"Of course," Tanya nodded, giving her daughter's hand a reassuring squeeze. She knew of Edward and Alice's closeness.

She ran to Alice's room where she found Bella thrashing on the air mattress. "Wake up sweetie," Tanya tried shaking Bella's shoulder with a little force.

Bella stopped moving and opened her eyes. Tanya almost screamed at the all-white orbs staring back.

"Tanya," she heard a very familiar voice say. A voice she hadn't heard in more than 15 years.

Bella grabbed Tanya's wrist and whispered slowly, "where is Anthony?"

Tanya trembled in fear, completely unnerved. Her world turned black.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Alice slowly approached Edward's bed. From past experiences she knew it was best not to startle him when he was like this. She would often soothe him with a light touch to his hand or forehead, lessening the possibility of him punching her in his fright.

Although he was unconscious, she knew if he hurt her he would blame himself. Edward always placed the responsibility squarely on his own shoulders.

Once she was close enough, she gently caressed his cheek, slowly trying to calm him with her touch. "Edward," Alice whispered, "Edward, wake up."

Edward almost convulsed when he heard Alice's voice, agonizing moans coming from deep within his chest.

"Edward, please," Alice insisted, "please, please, wake up."

"Marie," Edward whispered one final time before his agitated breathing started to even out.

_Who is this Marie chick?_ Alice wondered. Edward definitely had some explaining to do.

He stopped moving and opened his eyes slowly. Alice smiled; Edward was going to be okay. She was proud of herself for once again bringing her cousin back from his nightmares.

"Alice?" Edward blinked, trying to get his bearings.

"Yay!" Alice was tempted to jump up and down. The force of Edward's nightmare had frightened her. She had been scared she might not be able to wake him.

As Edward looked around, he recognized the bedroom and his cousin. He was still affected by the pain he had endured during his nightmare, but what shocked him the most was the fact that he could remember it at all.

"I remember, Alice," Edward whispered.

"Huh?" Alice asked, not sure she had heard correctly.

"I remember my nightmare," he said more forcefully.

Alice was momentarily stunned into silence by Edward's confession. Not once in all the years he had suffered had he been able to remember the nightmares. "Really?" she asked.

"Really," Edward confirmed.

"Well then we have much to discuss little cousin," Alice said, ruffling Edward's hair like she did when they were younger.

"I'm only two weeks younger than you!" Edward laughed briefly, forgetting the painful memories of his nightmare, until he heard Bella scream from the next room.

"Bella!" Alice said, jumping from the bed and running to her room, with Edward right behind.

"What's going on?" Alice demanded, entering her room and seeing her mother lying unconscious in Bella's lap.

"I don't know," Bella replied, "I was sleeping, and when I woke up I found your mom like this."

"Edward, please help me get mom to my bed," Alice pleaded.

Edward knelt down and with Bella's help he lifted his Aunt Tanya's limp body onto the mattress.

"I'll go get some smelling salts or something to wake her," Alice quickly ran out of the room.

"So…" Edward began, "you just woke up and found Aunt Tanya passed out in your lap?"

"Er… " Bella was hesitant to tell him that the frequent nightmares she thought were gone had returned and that is what woke her. But looking into Edward's eyes and remembering what this Marie had done in her dreams made her feel as though she were betraying Edward's trust. So instead she shared what she was comfortable with. "I had a bad dream and I woke up with her like that."

"A bad dream?" Alice snorted from the door. "If you call screaming your lungs out, calling for someone named Anthony, having a bad dream, then yes, I'd say you had a bad dream."

At the mention of Anthony's name Edward was shocked and turned to look in Bella's direction. _Had they shared the same dream?_ He was determined to find out.

**-x-x-x-x-**

After Alice managed to wake her mom, Tanya had quickly retreated to her bedroom, stating it was more than likely low blood sugar and that she just needed to lie down.

Bella had offered to help Alice get Tanya to her room, but Tanya recoiled at Bella's touch. To both Edward and Bella, she appeared panicked at the thought of being close to Bella. But each dismissed the idea as ridiculous. What could possibly make a grown woman afraid of a fifteen year old girl?

They all returned to their own beds and the remainder of the night was uneventful. The next morning, Alice desperately wanted to talk to both Edward and Bella about the night's events. But Tanya had errands to run, which apparently required Alice's assistance.

When Alice revealed that Bella's dad wasn't due to pick her up until noon, Edward saw his chance. _Finally, alone time with Bella_. Edward's house was within walking distance of Alice's so he invited Bella to spend the morning with him, tempting her with a piano performance.

Bella simply couldn't resist. Alone time with Edward, combined with a piano performance was Bella's idea of heaven. She sent her dad a text, giving him the new address where he should pick her up and as little info as possible about her change of plans. She didn't want him giving her grief over spending her Saturday morning with a boy. She didn't actually know how he would react since she had never had a boyfriend, but she didn't want to risk it. So she only said she would be going to a friend's house nearby.

Bella couldn't understand why, but the streets leading to Edward's house looked familiar. She was sure she had never been in this part of town, but somehow even the trees triggered a sense of nostalgia in her heart. However, nothing could have prepared her for the longing she felt once they reached their destination.

Edward's home was a lovely white mansion, in the middle of a meadow, surrounded by forests. It looked as though it belonged in a fairytale. But there was a sadness to the house that hinted that maybe it was a fairytale gone awry, in which the princess never woke up and the prince married the witch.

Bella's heart clenched at the thought.

Once inside Edward atypically yelled for his mother. Esme Cullen didn't like screaming in her house, but something about Bella made him feel his age, like he hadn't in… well, ever.

"Mom! I'm home and I brought a friend!" Edward shouted.

He knew he wouldn't receive an answer. Esme would die before raising her voice above what was acceptable for a lady, but at least he had made his presence known.

"Is your mom really here?" Bella asked when after a few minutes they received no answer.

"She is," Edward nodded. "She'll show up in a little while probably with a platter full of homemade cookies and lemonade."

Bella smiled at that thought. Her mom was great, but when it came to cooking, she was completely hopeless. When she was little, she believed all moms were like hers, until she met her friends' moms and discovered that wasn't exactly the case.

She was distracted from this train of thought when they arrived at what looked like a sunroom. Beautiful wide windows allowed the rare Forks sunlight to filter through, giving the room a magical quality.

"Beautiful," Bella murmured in appreciation.

"Yes, beautiful," Edward agreed.

Bella blushed when she sensed Edward's eyes on her, but before she could find a way to continue the conversation, a sleek black grand piano caught her attention. Bella practically squealed as she approached the instrument, and Edward smiled broadly at her enthusiasm.

"Would you play for me?" she asked excitedly.

Edward's smile threatened to split his face in two. "Of course," he replied. "Come and sit with me," he pointed to the bench in front of the piano.

Bella nervously sat next to Edward as he started a piece she immediately recognized as _Chopin's Nocturne in E_. She was enthralled by the way Edward's fingers caressed the keys and the way he played, so flawlessly, like an accomplished musician, not a fifteen-year-old boy.

Bella closed her eyes and enjoyed the melody, letting the notes surround her and fill her with their sweetness. Abruptly, the music stopped, the air charged with electricity, and she could almost feel the sparks sizzling in the air. Bella slowly opened her eyes to find Edward's face incredibly close to hers. She stopped breathing when Edward inched closer… _closer_… until someone cleared her throat.

Both teens jumped apart when an amused looking Esme walked into the room carrying a tray of cookies and lemonade – just as Edward had predicted.

"How are you kids doing?" Esme asked, putting the food on the small table in the middle of the room. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend, Edward?" Esme asked with a smirk.

Edward sighed, dreading the inevitable introduction.

"Mom," he said, getting up and leading Bella over to Esme. "This is Bella Swan."

A look of recognition and shock crossed Esme's face. "Swan?" she asked.

"Yes," Bella nodded, "a pleasure to meet you." Bella felt like she should curtsy in front of a woman like Esme, who seemed so prim and proper.

"Is your mom by any chance Renee Dwyer?" Esme continued.

"Yes, she is. Do you know her?" Bella asked.

Nothing could have prepared Edward or Bella for Esme's reaction.

As Bella held her stinging cheek, and Edward stood frozen in shock, they both were only able to form one coherent thought: what had occurred during that little introduction to cause Esme Cullen, the embodiment of good manners, to slap an innocent girl?

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**A/N** So I hope I haven't confused you too much…any questions you can ask me via review or at the Twilighted thread (link in my profile)… if I can-meaning if it doesn't give plot-facts away- I'll reply to them.

**Nocturne In E Flat Major, Op.9 No.2** by **Chopin** can be found on Youtube: **http : / / www . youtube . com / watch ? v = 5ZUw78FXpG4 **It is one of my favourite piano compositions.

A huge thank you to my pre-readers **lemonmartinis** and **Rhian0000** who always point stuff out to me when they don't make sense… I owe them so much …

Also my eternal gratitude to the women behind the curtain, **Dante Levine** and **Monamour** …they have so much patience helping a girl out with her rambling originals…

BTW I send big hugs and healthy vibes to **Monamour** who is on bed rest…get well soon, loved the Robporn at the thread *winks* and big kiss to your Irish nurses…

So I need to start chapter 6, I was out all night last night and now I'm paying the consequences…but my country is head of their group on the Soccer World Cup… so Woo Hoo!

Thanks so much for all the favourites, reviews, alerts, and to all the people who have recced this story,

Mwah!

Laters baby,

Ange


	7. Where to from Here?

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: ****Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 6: Where to from Here?**

"**Tomorrow will give us something to think about"**

_Marcus Tullius Cicero_

"Get out!" Esme roared at a stunned Bella.

"Mom!" Edward yelled, trying to get his mother's attention.

"I said get out!" Esme seethed, punctuating every word as if speaking to a dog that refused to obey.

"Mom!" Edward yelled more forcefully, placing himself in a protective stance in front of Bella.

Esme blinked, temporarily forgetting her murderous rage at the sight of her son defending the offending girl. He never contradicted her, he never went against her orders, he never questioned her, so the vision of him defending _a Dwyer _made her blood freeze. It was like fifteen years ago all over again.

"Edward, you don't understand, son," Esme said in softer voice, trying to get him out of the way.

"You're right, Mom, I don't! Would you please explain to me why you slapped my friend and now you're kicking her out of the house like she's a leper?"

He was enraged. Not only could he not understand Esme's reaction to Bella, but the idea of anyone, even his mom, hurting her in any way made him see red. No one touched Bella, not if he had any say in it.

"Edward, get out of the way. Now," Esme enunciated slowly and calmly. She was losing her patience and the way Edward shielded Bella brought back many unpleasant memories.

"No, I won't. I want an explanation, Mother," Edward insisted in a harsh tone.

He wasn't backing down. He had surprised himself when he decided to go against his mother. He had been raised to be obedient, to never raise his voice, to never question his parents' decisions.

He knew he would be grounded for raising his voice to his mother, but he didn't care about the consequences, only the trembling girl standing behind him. He needed to make her feel safe. _She should never feel anything but happiness_, Edward thought.

Esme lost her last iota of patience when Edward dared to question her in such a bold way. She had raised him to be a gentleman, not this cheeky boy standing in front of her. Yet again another _Dwyer_ got between her and her son. She wouldn't allow it.

Before Edward had time to react she sidestepped his protective form, and grabbed a very confused and scared Bella by the elbow. Bella shrieked in terror as Esme's fingers painfully dug into her flesh. This woman terrified her, and what frightened her the most was the seemingly unpredictable nature of her reactions. Not even her son's indignation swayed her from her violent attempts against Bella.

Edward immediately reacted, grabbing his mother's hand and forcefully removing it front Bella's tender elbow. Esme acted in response by instinct; she was completely blinded by a rage directed at someone she could no longer punish, so she unleashed the force of her anger on her own son, slapping him once with all her might.

Edward stood dumbfounded, staring at a woman he did not recognize. His mother would never hit him. His mother was not prone to violent outbursts like this. This woman was not the Esme he knew.

Esme's rage dissipated at the sight of her son's bloody lip. She was trying to protect him from this girl before she could damage him like _that girl _had damaged Anthony, but instead had hurt the most precious person in her life.

Edward, on the other hand, had had enough and before his mother could react, he turned to face a scared stiff Bella. With a reassuring smile he unexpectedly picked her up bridal-style and started to walk to the door.

"Edward!" He heard his mother yell after him but didn't care. He carried a precious trembling priority that clung to his neck for dear life. For the first time in his fifteen years, his mother placed second.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Bella held Edward like a limpet.

Never before had she felt as much hate as she did during Esme's attack. She even feared for Edward's safety when his mom struck him hard enough to draw blood. She had been so relieved when Edward got her out of the house that she didn't question the fact that _he_ was carrying _her_. That action, and the lopsided grin he flashed before picking her up, had rendered her incapable of doing anything but hugging him tightly. She didn't know where they were going, but could not worry. After seeing how he had defied his mom, she instinctively trusted him with her life.

They had walked for quite a while. Bella didn't exactly have the presence of mind to know how long he had carried her, but knew he must be tired. She grew anxious for Edward's well-being, and moved to extricate herself from his grasp.

"No," his soft voice whispered against her ear, making Bella's skin prickle and her body tremble in delight. "We are almost there."

He held her tighter and Bella allowed herself to snuggle further into his embrace. Hadn't she daydreamed about being in Edward's arms during this past week? Why not take advantage of this rare opportunity?

Suddenly, Edward stopped. Bella could see that they were in a wooded area and wondered why he had brought her there. He set her on her feet and she reluctantly let go of her hold on his neck.

Bella gasped when she took in the beauty around her. Not only was she standing in a stunning meadow full of flowers, but she was in _her_ meadow, her _dream meadow_.

She had dreamed of this place, and had drawn it from memory countless times since her family moved to Forks. Her meadow existed! This was beyond bizarre.

"Do you like it?" Edward asked in an excited voice.

Bella turned and faced a smiling Edward. Ever since she met him he had been gorgeous in her eyes, but here, in _her_ meadow, he was godlike. Something about the way the filtered sunlight made Edward's hair shimmer in different hues of bronze, his pale skin look as if made of marble, and his eyes shine impossibly greener caused Bella to consider the possibility that she had fainted and was dreaming.

Edward thought along those same lines as he took in the beauty that was Bella in _his_ meadow. Her hair, glossy and chocolate in the shade of Forks' clouded sky, sparkled in different tones of reddish-brown under the suns rays. Her skin, normally fair and rosy-cheeked, took on an ethereal quality. She looked like a forest nymph, magnificent and magical. Her shapely red lips called out to him, like the song of a siren. He couldn't resist and before realizing what his body was doing he came closer and closer until their lips made contact.

Bella's breathing hitched when Edward's mouth touched hers. If the spark between them was strong and buzzing whenever they touched, it turned into a lightning storm when their lips met.

She initially stiffened at the suddenness of Edward's lips descending on hers but once she allowed herself to feel their softness and the explosion of sensations they generated, she let her instincts take over. She pulled Edward down and circled his neck with her arms, bringing their lips as close as they could be.

Bella had never experienced any sort of romantic attraction before Edward. She had fantasized about her first kiss in vague terms, usually picturing herself in Pemberley, with her very own Mr. Darcy sweeping her off her feet and asking for her hand in marriage. The reality of her first kiss was much better than any fantasy.

Edward also drowned in the deluge of new sensations that soaked his soul. He had been propositioned several times by various girls in the last year. And even though some of them had been beautiful enough to be models, none had captured his attention. He had never been interested enough to kiss any of them. But that didn't stop him from appreciating that this shy meeting of lips, his first kiss, was far beyond his imagining.

Edward had expected to feel at peace when the nightmares stopped. He had expected to feel like a whole person when his dreams were his own. However, on the very day those nightmares came back to haunt him, he finally felt complete. He didn't consciously decide it, but his arms took on a life of their own and wrapped themselves around Bella's waist, bringing their bodies closer, as their bodies should be.

Bella felt as if she were on fire. The burn started where her lips joined Edward's, then spread, filling her heart with a fluttery flame that grew in intensity when Edward pressed her to him. She wasn't aware of time. They could have been kissing for mere minutes. They could have been kissing throughout the centuries.

But it didn't feel like a first kiss. She didn't feel as if strange lips bruised her own with passion. She felt as though she had finally found home, in Edward's arms, with his lips and body pressed to her own.

Edward groaned, and Bella was quickly reminded of his injured lip. She unwillingly separated her mouth from his but refused to step away from his embrace. Their heavy breathing and swollen lips were a testament of the precious moment they had shared.

No words seemed necessary at that moment. Bella felt as if she could read Edward's mind through his eyes. She could see in the mischievous glow that danced inside his green orbs that he felt sheepish, but happy.

Edward tried to gauge Bella's reaction to his kiss. She looked radiant with her lips red from his kissing. He saw no hurt or offense dancing in her coffee tinted irises. He only saw delight and understanding. He smiled as he caressed Bella's lower lip with his thumb.

Bella shivered at Edward's touch. Her still sensitive lips felt alight under his soft strokes. Her eyes were prisoners of Edward's intense stare. She felt trapped inside a bubble of glee in his arms.

But when she caught sight of a bit of blood on the corner of Edward's mouth, her bubble burst. She would normally cringe at the sight of blood but her only instinct was to take care of Edward as gently as she could. She ripped a small piece of her shirt and wiped the blood drops with it. She used light touches, trying to spare Edward all the pain she could.

The way Bella took care of him made Edward smile. No one but Alice had ever been so gentle. His mother was always too busy with bossing everyone around to spare a moment to be sweet to him. He knew his mother adored him, but she was very firm with his education and care, as if she was trying to toughen him up. The memory of his mother and the fact that Bella's red cheek and his wounded lip was a direct consequence of Esme's actions made Edward feel ashamed.

"I'm so sorry," he said with a troubled expression as he caressed Bella's reddened cheek.

Bella blinked, perplexed. _Why was Edward sorry? Was he sorry that he kissed me? _Bella's insecurities surfaced briefly, but when she remembered his look after they broke apart, those doubts were obliterated. He had enjoyed the kiss just as much as she had. Then Bella noticed how he tenderly caressed the cheek that Esme had struck earlier that day, and realized the reason behind his apology.

"Don't be," Bella replied, taking his caressing hand in hers. She placed a sweet kiss on his palm and watched with excitement how Edward gulped at the gesture.

"But my mom… " Edward began in a hesitant voice. Bella stood on her tiptoes and kissed the corner of his lip, the same corner where she had just wiped off blood.

"There," Bella smiled at a very much dazed Edward. "I kissed it better."

Edward was completely blown away by the not so pure feelings even Bella's smallest gestures could stir within him. He had heard of the wonders of first love, but his time with Bella felt more incredible than those descriptions.

He could read Bella's expressions like an open book, and few words were needed between them to convey so much meaning. Being with Bella felt as natural as breathing and as comforting as home.

And even though he knew he should be scared of such intensity so soon, he wasn't. Something inside told him he was going at the right speed in the right direction. He finally understood his father's words that everyone had a compass in their heart.

Edward's had guided him to Bella since the first day, since the first time they had tripped and fell to the ground together, since the first time he knew how to strike up conversation with her, since the first time he shared his passion for music with her, since the first time he tried to kiss her. He had a compass, and its needle pointed to Bella, his north.

Edward was brought back to the real world by the sweet voice of his angel.

"Edward? Edward?" Bella asked, trying to draw his attention back to her. He had seemed so lost in thought she was afraid her little playful gesture had been too much. She had no experience with boys and didn't know what was appropriate.

"Yes," Edward replied with a warm smile to a worried Bella, who immediately relaxed.

"Why do you think your mother reacted like that?"

Edward was at a loss for words. He honestly couldn't think of a reasonable explanation to justify his mother's actions. "I really don't know, Bella. All I know is that the woman you met today didn't act like the mother I know at all. I think we should wait here for your dad to call and pick you up while she cools off a bit, and then I'll ask her what her problem is."

Bella nodded in agreement. There really wasn't much more they could do. Still, the idea of Edward returning to his house, alone with that crazed woman, frightened her deeply.

"Edward… um… " she hesitated.

"What?" Edward responded, lifting her chin so that he could look into her eyes.

"I was just wondering… " Bella trailed off, "if maybe… um… it wasn't better if you came home with me, and waited until your dad and your brother were back from their fishing trip. I really don't like the idea of you and your mom alone in that house."

Edward's smile could have brightened up the darkest of Forks' days when he realized that as deep as his feelings were for Bella, she too felt strongly for him. She was worried about his safety. Edward started to laugh.

Bella misread Edward's happiness as amusement and felt the impulse to stomp her foot in a very unladylike manner to make him stop. Luckily, she refrained and just threw him a deadly glare.

Edward immediately subdued his laughter before Bella's glower. He really didn't want to cross the only girl he had ever liked.

"Sorry," he tried to explain, "I wasn't laughing at you. It's just that I can't help but feel blissfully happy when I'm in your company."

Bella's expression shifted to the goofiest of grins at Edward's words. That boy really had a way of transforming her heart to mush in the space of a nanosecond.

"For the record," Edward continued after a few seconds, "I'm almost a foot taller than my mom, and the only reason she could hit me was because we were too distracted by all the commotion. I'm sure she didn't even intend to hit me. She was just too caught up in her anger."

Bella sighed in relief at the truth behind Edward's words. He was in no real danger as long as he wasn't defending her. The thought was saddening. It was clear that whatever set Edward's mom off had something to do with the Swans. It was at the mention of her mother's name that she became enraged, and even though she would much prefer to stay at Edward's side, she also couldn't wait to ask her mom if she knew Esme Cullen.

Trying to change the subject, Bella voiced the question she wanted to ask when they first arrived at this beautiful place. Before her first kiss.

"Where are we?"

Edward grinned before replying. "We are at _my_ meadow, well more like _our_ meadow now," he said, grabbing Bella's hand in his and inviting her to sit next to him on the flowerbed.

"This place is close enough to my house for me to walk to, and hidden enough for me to enjoy my solitude, which before I met you meant a great deal to me."

"I always come here to think and enjoy the view. It's the only place where I can feel peaceful even when I'm really mad. That's why I brought you here. This is my safe haven."

"I have seen this meadow before," Bella whispered, but Edward heard her perfectly.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…. " she hesitated, unable to find a reasonable explanation for her dreams and unwilling to lie to Edward after her recent nightmare.

She sighed heavily, gathering strength before continuing. "You're going to think this is so crazy, but… um… I've dreamed about this meadow before."

Edward gave her a confused look and she continued before he could respond. "Ever since we moved to Forks I've been having these weird dreams where I'm in this meadow. Sometimes I'm sleeping here under the sun, sometimes I'm sitting by that rock drawing," she pointed at a sizable boulder near a stream. "Or just dancing, which is completely out of character for me because I do not dance."

Edward sighed longingly at the mental picture of Bella doing any of those things, especially _dancing_. He decided right then and there that he would do everything in his power to persuade Bella to give him a performance of her supposedly appalling dancing skills.

However, this whole dream issue brought last night's to the forefront of his mind. Why were they both having these strange, ominous dreams? What was their purpose? Why was Bella sharing his private curse?

"Um… " he said, doubt tainting his tone. Edward didn't know how to start a conversation that was bound to be at the very least _weird_. "About those dreams… last night… er… what exactly did you dream?"

Bella paled at the question. Even though she knew _she_ hadn't done the things Anthony accused Marie of, she couldn't help but feel guilt for what her dream-self had done to that boy Anthony. She didn't know the details, but based solely on Anthony's pained face she knew that whatever Marie had done, it had been _bad_, really _bad_.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Edward reassured her, taking her hands in his. He felt pretty bad for putting Bella on the spot. He desperately wanted to confirm his suspicions that they had shared the same dream, but he realized he was being a coward by making Bella confess to it first.

Trying to be the gentleman he knew he should be, he silenced Bella and placed a finger on her lips before she could answer. "All my life I've suffered from nightmares," he confessed in an uneven voice, while gauging Bella's reaction. He was surprised to find compassion instead of the fright and contempt he had expected.

Encouraged, he continued before he lost his nerve. "I was never able to remember them once I woke up, and I've spent most of my life trying to hide the fact that I have them from my family. Only Alice knows. A little over a week ago they stopped. They just stopped, but instead of feeling relieved I felt lost. They had been the only constant in my life for so long that I didn't know what to do without them. This may sound weird to you, but it was like I lost a part of me when they left. But last night, they came back. The difference is that I remember it." Edward sat in silence as he waited for Bella's reply.

"Ever since I could remember," Bella started after taking a deep breath, "I've suffered from terrifying nightmares. My parents didn't know what to do with me and took me to see hundreds of shrinks. It never helped because I couldn't remember what they were about but I kept going. My last psychologist advised my parents that a change of scenery might do me some good, take my mind off things. So they decided we should move to my mom's hometown. Once we got here the nightmares stopped and I started to dream normal teenage dreams," Bella shrugged at this point, "or at least I thought they were normal before I discovered I was actually dreaming of a place that really existed and that I've never seen in my life until this day."

Bella gripped Edward's hand tighter in hers and continued with her account. "I did feel some form of relief when they stopped, but I didn't feel _complete_. I still felt a sense of something like… um… " She pondered the best way to describe her feelings when the nightmares stopped. "Maybe nostalgia or longing? I don't know, I just didn't feel like myself. And last night I had a nightmare again, and it was heart-wrenching, and it was scary. But today, here with you in this meadow, I finally feel whole, even if the nightmares have really come back."

Edward felt like a weight had lifted from his shoulders at Bella's confession, and turned her around, so she was sitting between his legs with her back pressed against his chest.

"What was your nightmare about?" Edward inquired after a few moments. "Did you dream about a couple fighting in a rainy street at night? About a boy named Anthony and a girl named Marie?"

"How did you know?" Bella asked in shock, turning slightly in Edward's arms to see the expression on his face.

"Because I had the same dream."

**-x-x-x-x-**

Edward and Bella spent all morning dissecting every detail of their shared dream. They decided that before trying to figure out why they were having the same dream, they needed to find out whether Marie and Anthony were real people and whether there was a connection to Edward and Bella.

There was also an impending talk between Bella and her parents and Edward and his. They were both sure that the adults were hiding information from them and they desperately needed answers.

"Doesn't this feel like the calm before the storm?" Bella asked. Before Edward could voice his worries about the future her cell phone rang.

"Bella!" a frantic sounding Charlie yelled through the speaker. "Where are you? Are you at that address that you texted me? I'm so sorry, Princess! I was at a meeting and I just read it. Are you alright?" He went on and on, raising Bella's suspicions that her parents knew a lot more about Edward's mom than she thought. Why else would her dad sound so rattled?

"Dad! Calm down! I'm perfectly fine. There was a change of plans and we had a picnic about six blocks away from the address I sent you. Can you meet me at the side of the road in about ten minutes? How far away are you?" Bella asked her dad, trying to reassure him.

"I'm a couple of minutes away. Are you alone?"

"No, dad, I'm with my friend. We'll be there in a minute. Remember it's just six blocks past the address I texted. It will look like forest to you from the road, but we are in a clearing. Just wait for me there, we're on our way."

"Okay, I'm almost there," Charlie said, sounding calmer.

Bella hung up and shared a conspiratorial look with Edward before they started walking to the main road.

"Okay," Bella said, stopping when she saw her father's parked car through the trees. "You better go to your house and leave me here. I don't know yet if my parents hate your parents too, and I think we've both been slapped enough for one day."

She caressed Edward's slightly swollen lower lip and placed her index finger over his mouth before he could respond. "I'll be fine. It's you I'm worried about. Please call me on my cell once you have your talk with your mom."

"I will."

With a final peck on Edward's lips, Bella sprinted through the trees towards her family's SUV, which would carry her home to the only people who could answer her many questions.

No matter what happened in the future, Bella knew that she and Edward were inseparable now, one soul in two bodies. If anyone tried to break them apart they would face a magnificent foe. Edward and Bella were no longer fighting for love or friendship but survival. Separation for them was no longer an option; being apart was death.

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**A/N** I hope you remember this tidbit from **Chapter ****3**:

_Bella started sketching on her notebook while the rest of the students continued to arrive. She was so focused on the drawing—a __**beautiful meadow full of flowers she had dreamed the first night she spent at the new house**__—that she didn't hear the person next to her._

So yes, I didn't just invent the **Meadow dreams** Bella was having *giggles* Well if we are being accurate I did invent everything. *shrugs*

Thank you so much to my suffering Betas, I flove you and your undying patience, **Monamour**, **Dante Levine**, You rock!

Also, my pre-readers, **lemonmartinis** and **Rhian0000**, they suffer for my art as well *sniffs* I adore you all.

I have a **Twilighted thread** and a **Blog** where I post teasers/announcements. (links on my profile)

Congrats to the teams that continue on the World Cup, my team it's still in *fingers crossed for Tuesday's match*

Also, commiserations to those that were eliminated, you were amongst the best 16 in the World, feel proud.

This week I would like to remind you-or let you know if this is News to you- that the 'Fandom Gives Back' auctions have started…there are lots of items (outtakes from popular stories, crafts, Banners/Blinkies, autographs from Twilight stars, etc) being auctioned off…Please buy something or Donate to Alex Lemonade Stand, they do work for kids with cancer, what greater cause to donate than that?

**The Fandom gives back site: h**** t t p : / / w w w . thefandomgivesback . com /**

**Alex Lemonade Stand Site: h t t p : / / w w w . alexslemonade . org / mypage / 19842**

_**Just delete the extra spaces**_

As always thank you for taking the time to read,

I promise some answers next chapter,

((hugs))

Ange


	8. Star Crossed Lovers

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

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**Chapter 7: Star-Crossed Lovers**

"**The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone"**

_Harriet Beecher Stowe_

Esme poured herself another glass of scotch. She wasn't one to drink during the day, but she had just relived memories she would give anything to forget. If getting drunk was what she needed to forget this morning a hangover was a very small price to pay.

She stared at the golden-brown liquid as memories cut through her heart and reopened wounds she believed had closed. She remembered the night Anthony told her he needed to leave Forks, how he had begged to move to New York to live with his uncle Aro; his desperation and sadness that fateful night, the hollowness of his voice when he said goodbye to his family at Seatac.

But those weren't the most haunting. Slowly, cold filled her; starting at her toes, climbing to engulf her bleeding heart as memories of the last time she ever saw Anthony alive invaded her senses. How he had defended _that girl_, said that everything was forgiven and that they were going away together, to college. Esme had been furious. Her son always fell for _that girl's_ lies, always. Had she raised him to be that gullible and naïve? Esme knew the answer to that question was yes.

Anthony had been the sweetest, most sheltered boy in the world. Her failure had been her extreme over-protectiveness. She hadn't taught him that blind trust, even in those he loved, could mean certain doom. He didn't know when to cut his losses; he kept fighting for _that girl_ until it killed him.

Esme gulped the entire glass, attempting to suppress memories of the night Anthony died. She poured herself another drink as she remembered the phone call about a car accident that changed her life forever. Tears started to fall from her eyes, unwanted tears, tears of weakness. She didn't tolerate weakness in herself. Her weakness had cost her one son already. It would not cost her two.

She wiped her eyes and recalled the worst pain she had felt in her life. Some women complain about the pain of delivery, but in Esme's opinion, bringing a child into the world didn't hurt nearly as bad as losing one to the evils of it did. She would take the pain of a thousand births over the pain she felt that night as she watched her son, her Anthony, laying lifeless and cold in the morgue.

She had been asked to identify the body. Carlisle had been away at a conference. She wished she could erase that vision from her mind, but no amount of liquor could numb her enough to forget. Anthony's empty eyes—eyes that had been green and alive like the trees in May—would haunt her nightmares until the day she died.

It had been entirely _that wretched girl's_ fault. Anthony was supposed to go to Juilliard, marry a nice girl like Rosalie and have beautiful babies. All the hopes and dreams she had for her son had died that night, and it was all because of Marie Dwyer.

She was brought back to the present when she heard the front door slamming and Edward's voice calling for her. She wiped her face with a napkin, trying to erase any sign of her tears. She had long ago decided not to make the same mistakes with Edward that she did with Anthony. She wasn't going to be weak or teach him to be weak. Edward would be a survivor, not a victim. She would make sure of that.

"Mom!" Edward said as he came face to face with Esme. He dreaded the conversation that needed to happen between them, but he couldn't wait for his father. He needed to have a talk with his mom as soon as possible otherwise he knew this talk would never happen. If Edward had learned how to hide things and lie from anyone in his family, he knew without a doubt that person was Esme.

Edward knew his lower lip looked bad; swollen and bruised. He wanted his mom to see what she did. Maybe now that she had had time to calm down she would realize just how wrong her actions had been, especially when faced with the evidence of them.

"Edward," Esme said in a gruff voice. She stared at her son's battered lip and felt like flinching. She felt the pain of what she had regretfully done to her own flesh and blood. She struggled to recover from her initial reaction.

"What do you want?" she asked, in the vain attempt to avoid the unavoidable. She wasn't looking forward to this particular heart-to-heart with her son.

"I think you know, Mom," Edward replied with determination. "We need to have a serious talk."

**-x-x-x-x-**

When Bella and her dad arrived home Renee was sitting on the porch. The minute Bella stepped out of the car she was engulfed in a tight hug. Her mom's enthusiastic greeting further cemented Bella's suspicion that her parents feared for her safety while they thought she was at the Cullens'. They definitely knew more about that family than they'd ever mentioned.

"Mom! You're squeezing the air out of me!" Bella choked, trying to escape her mother's death grip.

"Sorry, honey. I was just so worried about you when your dad called," Renee confessed before realizing she had made a mistake. Bella didn't know, and Renee didn't want her to know, the reason behind her concern.

Bella noticed how her mother paled after her admission, further proof that she was trying to hide something, and failing. She needed answers and she was going to get them.

"Mom, Dad?" Bella began, "I think we need to talk."

Renee and Charlie shared a confused look before Charlie responded, "Of course, darling. What do you want to talk about?"

"The Cullens."

**-x-x-x-x-**

"Why did you slap Bella? What has she ever done to deserve the way you treated her?" Edward asked without preamble.

Esme laughed bitterly. She had hidden things from Edward all of his life and it was extremely ironic how the truth had a way of surfacing no matter how hard she tried to bury it. She knew there was no point in keeping silent. Edward was a stubborn boy and would keep asking until he got answers.

"What are you laughing at?" Edward asked in an aggravated tone. He couldn't believe his mother found anything amusing about this situation.

"Oh, Edward, if you only knew," Esme responded, snorting at her son's indignation.

"That's exactly the problem, Mother! I don't know and I should," Edward yelled. He was tired of his mother's deflection tactics. He wanted straight answers, not guessing-games.

Esme stopped laughing immediately, in shock. Once again Edward had yelled at her, when just the day before he wouldn't have dared to raise his voice in her presence. Her little boy was growing up, but under the wrong influence.

"Don't you yell at me Edward Anthony Cu…" she stopped herself. She said the one name that at this exact moment could bring her to tears.

A strangled sob came from his mom and Edward found himself torn between wanting to console her, even though he didn't understand her pain or her mood changes, and staying where he was. He felt that Esme might be trying to manipulate him, pretending to be emotional to buy time.

However, when he saw his mother's tearful face he immediately ran to gather her in his arms. He didn't recognize the woman he was holding. He had always known an unbreakable Esme, a woman so put together that she never cried. But in the space of a single day, she had become so emotionally unpredictable; he didn't know when she would break down in tears or start yelling.

"Mom! Mom, talk to me please," Edward begged as Esme continued to sob into his chest. "Please, mom, help me understand what's going on. I'm confused. Do you know Bella and her family?"

Esme tried to control her weeping in order to answer her son. She released her tight hold on Edward's shirt and walked to the fireplace. She looked at the family photographs displayed on the mantel: Edward's first piano recital; Jacob's graduation and wedding; her own wedding pictures. She knew exactly which pictures were missing.

Right after Anthony's death, Carlisle removed all the photographs and had hidden them away to prevent one of her nervous breakdowns. After a while, she was able to focus on her newborn son, Edward, and the Cullens pretended to be fine, ignoring the gigantic elephant in the room.

Esme was happy with Edward; caring for him, enjoying motherhood from the beginning all over again, why bring back painful memories? And that's how Anthony had become a taboo topic in the house.

Everyone ignored the anniversary of Anthony's death, instead focusing on the one positive thing they celebrated that day as well; Edward's birthday. He was born two months before his due date, a consequence of the emotional stress Esme endured when she identified Anthony's body. It was a miracle Edward had survived at all. He was weak and very small. Esme would forever feel guilty over the circumstances of Edward's birth. If she had called Jacob, she wouldn't have had to go into that morgue, and she wouldn't have had Edward before it was time.

Esme clutched her locket hard between her fingers; it was the one thing she wasn't able to part with. It was Anthony's last gift before the big fight that created a rift between them. She turned and walked to where Edward stood. She unhooked the locket and opened it, before placing it in Edward's hands.

"That, my dear, is your brother Anthony," she said in a hollow voice.

A boy with Edward's exact shade of green eyes smiled in the photograph.

"Huh?" was all Edward could reply to the shocking revelation.

**-x-x-x-x-**

The Swan clan sat in the living room staring at each other.

When Bella had asked about the Cullens, Charlie suggested they go inside to talk more comfortably. But after they sat down neither Renee nor Charlie knew how to discuss the _Cullens_. They didn't know how much Bella knew, but she obviously knew something, hence their hesitation to start a potentially awkward conversation.

They kept a lot of things from Bella to protect her innocent mind, but evil sneaked into their lives anyway. They suspected the Cullens still lived in Forks and took a big risk by moving here. They wanted to spare their daughter the troubling nightmares that had plagued her sleep since she was a toddler. They succeeded in that respect, so they couldn't truly feel bad about their decision. Now they would have to wade through the possible complications-the Cullens being one of them.

Charlie was particularly worried for his wife. He had to acknowledge that she was the true reason they hadn't told Bella anything. He would have been satisfied and his conscience clear if he shared the tragic events of the past with his daughter a lot sooner, but he didn't for Renee's sake. He knew she would have to be included in that conversation, since it was a story about her family, not his. But he wasn't sure she was ready to face her demons and this was why he was shocked when she broke the silence.

"You went to the Cullens after all," Renee said. It was a statement, not a question.

Bella was once again floored by her mother's intuition; she knew she shouldn't be though. Renee had more than proven how good she was at reading her and figuring out what was going through her mind. Still, it took a couple of minutes for Bella to reply in a soft voice, "Yes."

"Esme treated you badly? Did she say anything insulting?" Renee continued.

"She did that, and then some. She slapped me and her son, too."

"That bitch," Charlie muttered, shocking Bella. Her dad never swore.

Renee just shook her head amused over Charlie's slip-up.

"Her son?" she inquired after a short pause, before she remembered. "Oh, it was a boy."

Bella was baffled by the words. Her mother seemed far away, thinking of unsettling things. Bella could see it in her face.

Renee sighed before continuing; she needed all of her strength to tell this story. She would try to skip the gory details as much as she could but she would be honest. Bella deserved that.

"I had a sister, she is… " Renee stopped to collect herself. "She passed away."

Bella had a million and one questions, but before she could ask them Renee raised her hand. "Please let me finish before you ask anything. It is a hard story for me to tell, and if I'm going to tell it, it has to be like ripping off a band-aid."

Bella nodded. It was obviously sad and very hard to relive, so Bella kept quiet to allow her mom to go at her own pace.

"She was almost three years younger than me. She was brunette, like you, and so beautiful. I loved her deeply." Renee stood up and sat by the window, staring at the light drizzle that started to fall after Bella got home. A sunny day never did last in Forks.

"I've told you stories about how our mother was with us. Your grandma Jane was not what you would call an exemplary mother, and your grandpa Phil was at best mediocre as a parent. Neither of them ever really took care of us. As you already know they both came from money, hence the size of this house." Renee waved her hand dismissively as if the size of their home wasn't really all that important when in fact it was one of the biggest in Forks.

"When I was around fourteen they lost it all. My father wasn't a very good investor, so it was bound to happen eventually. They sold everything, except for this house, and that's how we ended up moving down here." Renee hugged herself, signaling to Bella that the _bad_ part of this story came next.

"My mother found solace in alcohol, and belittling us, especially Marie. I was the 'good daughter'," she emphasized with air quotes. "I dressed nice, I volunteered, I got good grades. I was the socialite she had raised me to be, minus the actual money. She was certain I would marry into wealth and save them all from poverty. Marie was a wallflower, and she loved books like you do, so she wasn't the daughter Jane wanted, and she made sure Marie knew it."

"I earned a scholarship for Yale and moved back East. I couldn't have been happier. I was finally away from this place and the parent that made me so miserable. I was so happy; I selfishly dismissed the fact that my little sister was going to be left behind as the sole target of her attacks.

"Marie wrote to me for the first six months I was away. She had met this boy, Anthony." Bella gasped when she heard the name.

Renee turned and observed her daughter carefully, trying to read her as she always did. She couldn't figure out Bella's reaction to the mention of Anthony's name, but assumed Esme must have said something to her about him, so she continued.

"Anyways, she sounded genuinely happy for the first time in our lives. She told me how wonderful he was, that he was from New York and had moved here with his family. From her letters she really sounded like a sixteen year old girl. Happy, giggly and foolish. Then suddenly the letters stopped.

"I assumed she was too wrapped up with her new boyfriend to write, and whenever I called home my mother never mentioned there was anything wrong. I was busy with college, and had just met your father so I let time go by and didn't ask too many questions. I'll never forgive myself for that."

Bella, still stunned by the discovery of her ties to Marie, noticed how her mother's face darkened with an expression of an ancient sorrow. She could guess the events that followed if her dreams were any indication.

"After eighteen months or so, my mom called me. I wasn't home so she left a message. Jane Dwyer didn't make scenes or act desperate, it was beneath her, but her voice told me she was in trouble. I called her back as soon as I could, and she told me Marie was in the hospital because she had ODed. I didn't even know my little sister was doing drugs."

Charlie walked to where Renee was sitting and grabbed her hand in reassurance. He had been there for this part of the story so he continued, giving Renee time to recover.

"I accompanied your mom to the hospital, and while we were waiting for news your mom ran into an old high school friend who worked there. She told us just how bad Marie had been for the last year."

Renee clutched Charlie's hand tighter and picked up the story. "My friend told me she had had some sort of fight with her boyfriend. Apparently Marie cheated on him, and he moved to New York to live with his uncle. She had become an alcoholic and a drug addict at the tender age of seventeen. She had developed a reputation for wild partying and sleeping around. Supposedly, she would have sex with anyone willing to buy her a drink or drugs." Her tears flowed freely at the thought of her little sister in such a situation.

Bella's eyes widened. She assumed, based on the one dream she remembered, that Marie had been a troubled girl and had broken Anthony's heart. She remembered Anthony's drug use accusations, even the ones about Marie sleeping with someone else, but she thought it was only one person, not _anyone_ willing to support her vices. Bella fought against the bile that rose in her throat. She knew it was bad, but not _this bad_.

"He was at the hospital you know," Renee murmured after a long silence. "Anthony. He was there. If half the things I was told were true that boy had been through hell and back for my sister, and yet he was there, worried sick for her. He spent the night sleeping in the hallway and didn't leave until the doctors assured us she was going to be fine. He came back the next day, and brought a bouquet of lavender colored roses. Marie wasn't awake yet so I took the opportunity to ask him why he kept coming back if they had truly broken up on such bad terms. You know what he said?"

Bella hadn't the slightest idea of why he would care so much for someone who hurt him that badly.

"He told me," Renee answered, "_because I have no choice. I didn't choose to love her, and I can't make myself un-love her any more than I can take my heart out of my chest and continue living. I've spent the last year trying to forget her. I fooled myself into thinking I had, but once I was back I knew I hadn't. She's my life_." She sighed remembering those words and how true they rang even after all the events that transpired later. "He was a pretty intense boy for his age."

_Sometimes, I wish he had known when to give up. I'm not sure Marie wanted to be saved_, Renee thought, but she didn't share her musings with her family.

Bella's heart warmed when she heard Anthony's reply, the romantic in her was in awe of the depth of his love for Marie, the cynic in her was amazed at how blind he had been. However, for Bella, something didn't add up. She could understand Esme being mad at Marie, but why had she and Renee been measured with the same ruler? Esme's anger was too deep to be explained by Anthony's heartbreak. There had to be something more, and she was sure it was related to the way Marie and Anthony died.

"How did they die?" Bella finally asked when she could no longer bear her mother's silence.

Renee shook her head in disbelief. Her daughter was just as intuitive as she was, always cutting to the point of things. She took a shaky breath before responding, "After that Marie went into rehab and I stayed a couple of months to help. My dad was involved with some pretty shady people, which I assume was how Marie got involved with drugs. I guess he was trying to regain his fortune in not-so-honest ways. I was afraid to leave Marie in this house with dealers coming in and out of here. My father's 'business associates' wouldn't hesitate to sell to her, if she met their price." Renee shuddered when she thought of the 'alternative' forms of payment those men would have taken.

"But it was Anthony who convinced me to leave. After my sister's close call with death he decided he was going to take care of her. He was already eighteen, so he had his trust-fund money. He went against his family, against Esme, to take care of Marie. He moved her out of here and to live with him in a house he bought for her. He hired a lawyer to get her emancipated. He freed Marie. I went away satisfied she would be safe."

Bella only nodded. She knew that Marie hadn't been safe. Something tragic had happened.

Renee's tears ran freely; this was the hardest part of her sister's story "Marie and Anthony went away to college after a few months. She wrote me about how happy she was, how much Anthony loved her, how she was studying English and would one day be a writer. I dreaded the idea of a wedding with how my family was, so your dad and I eloped. I invited Marie and Anthony along and we got married in Vegas. That was the last time I saw her alive. She had been radiating happiness. I've never seen her that happy."

Bella felt a knot in her throat. She knew the end of this tragic tale was near, and she didn't look forward to it. _Star-crossed lovers,_ Bella thought, as tears started to fall from her eyes as well.

"Almost nine months later I received a call. We were living in Portland at the time so we weren't far from Forks. I was very pregnant with you and your dad's business was starting to take off. I was busy with my life and hadn't seen Marie or talked to her in almost three months. I assumed she was equally busy with her life. That was always my biggest mistake with Marie, I assumed too much."

"The call was from Forks Hospital. They wanted your mom to identify a body," Charlie explained when Renee's emotions overwhelmed her. She continued to sob in Charlie's arms as he finished the story.

"Marie had jumped from a cliff in La Push; apparently there were drugs in her system. It was ruled a suicide."

Bella's whole body stiffened when the word _suicide_ left her father's lips. She was right; it was all about how they died. She almost didn't want to know what happened to Anthony.

"According to the police," Charlie said, "she and Anthony had some sort of fight. Marie was supposedly doing drugs again and Anthony wouldn't put up with it. Anthony left her and returned to Forks they assume to reconcile with his family, because what other reason could there be for him to drive to Forks after fighting with Marie. Marie rented a car and followed him. The police investigation showed that the car Marie rented had hit Anthony's car in the rear, that she purposefully made Anthony's car lose control. He died at the scene, not far from where Marie's rental was found, and from the cliff where she jumped."

Bella's whole body felt as if a bucket of ice water had been dumped on her. _Marie had killed Anthony?_

**-x-x-x-x-**

Edward lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't believe the story his mother had told.

He still wasn't over the fact that Marie and Anthony were real people when Esme dropped the rest of the story on him. She told him about everything Marie had done, how she had broken their family apart, and then how she finally had ended Anthony's life.

He couldn't believe it.

In the end he tried to reason with his mom that Bella wasn't born when all this took place and that Esme's treatment of her was still inexcusable.

His mother had yelled that she wouldn't allow history to repeat itself and ordered Edward to his room. She told him all the Dwyers were rotten, and she wouldn't permit his friendship with Bella to continue. She told him he would not be destroyed by that family.

Edward wondered if Bella's parents were as stubborn in their attitude towards his family. He had never believed in stories like Romeo and Juliet's. He had thought them part of the world of fiction, but tonight he felt like a real life Romeo. He only hoped he would be smarter and less impulsive. Those two flaws had been the source of his major mistakes; the ones that cost Romeo his life.

He looked at his watch and realized it was barely five in the afternoon. He needed to talk to Bella but he needed to do it face to face. The conversation about their relatives' untimely and tragic demise wasn't one that could wait, because of the nightmares. He got up, and grabbed some money for a cab, as well as his cell. He was going to try and see Bella even if her parents kicked him out.

But his plans were soon foiled when he tried to turn the doorknob. The door wouldn't open. Esme had locked him in.

* * *

**A/N** So, I'm alive, I didn't die, but a cousin of mine did on very tragic circumstances. Thus, the week I took off. I don't know if any of you know about how Catholic rituals work for wakes and burials, but they are sad all-night-long affairs. My cousin and I weren't close, he was almost a decade older than me, but I was still too upset to post, I hope you understand.

I made a youtube video for this story, which you can find here:

http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v = Vr4c1owfp _ U

_Just delete the extra spaces._

Now as always, I will like to take a moment to thank all the people that help me make this thing readable, my suffering Betas **Dante Levine** and **Monamour**, and my pre-readers **Rhian0000** and **Lemonmartinis**. They all take time out of their daily lives to help me and I'll be forever grateful for that.

Also, I will like to do a small rec, **ChiTwiGal** is a first time author that like many of us is courageously putting herself out there with her first story. Please give her story a chance, and show her some love. Writing a fic is a lot harder than most people think, as it's to post it for everyone's scrutiny. You can find her story here:

http : / / www . fanfiction . net / s / 6099557 / 1 /

_Just delete the extra spaces._

I'm on Twitter as **ange_de_laube **I post any news there, at the **Twilighted thread** and also in my **Blog **(links on profile)

Thank you for your patience and kind words during this last week, for taking the time to read, review, and recommend this story.

(Hugs)

Ange


	9. The Attic

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**This plotline, however, is mine. I really don't see the point in stealing something I'm already providing for free, so please refrain from plagiarizing this story. Thank you. **

**Finally, if you are not old enough to vote, you probably shouldn't read my fic. It's accordingly rated and that should be enough to deter you. However, I know how curious teens can be. I will not take responsibility for you reading this if you aren't over the legal age. That's your parents' job not mine. **

**To all those old enough to vote, happy reading!**

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**Chapter 8: The Attic**

"**The past is our definition. We may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to escape what is bad in it, but we will escape it only by adding something better to it."**

_Wendell Berry_

Fairy tales are wonderful, full of fantastical scenarios and magic that helps solve every problem. The beautiful princess meets a dashing prince; they dance, they kiss and they ride off into the sunset to live happily ever after. _Why couldn't real life be that simple?_

Bella meditated about this while she sat in her bed. She was still in a slight state of shock over the many revelations of the day. She had assumed from the dream she and Edward had shared that Marie and Anthony's story was probably one of trials and tribulations, but the romantic inside her had wished them a happy ending. Not the tragic one they had suffered.

She also couldn't understand why she was crying. She never knew of her aunt Marie until this day. She had no feelings for her, but for some reason she was unable to stop the tears from falling.

Thinking of all the dreadful things Marie had done made Bella feel sick. Killing her love who fought for her until the very end, because she couldn't cope with the idea of him giving up, of him leaving her. _How could she?_ What was she thinking when she hit her car against Anthony's? Was she planning on killing him, or did she just want him to stop and listen to her? How could someone be capable of harming, murdering the one you love the most?

_Why do we hurt the ones we love?_ Bella pondered as the wind outside started to pick up, making the branches of the tree outside her window sway lightly. This had become a comforting sound in this strange night; something constant in her currently changeful life.

She sighed as she lay down staring absentmindedly at the ceiling. She had so many things to mull over – her aunt's tragic past, her present predicament regarding her relationship with Edward, the obstacles standing in their way. How had her life gotten so complicated?

Just thinking about her aunt being a murderer, about her taking her own life, made Bella shiver. The idea of ever being so in love you couldn't fathom a life without your lover had seemed foreign to Bella a couple of weeks ago. Now, after meeting Edward, the concept of desperate, hopeless, endless love didn't seem so odd.

As these feelings swept through Bella's heart she closed her eyes and smiled. She could still taste Edward on her lips; a sweet taste that intoxicated her, drowned her, leaving her incapable of coherent thought.

Feelings like passion, infatuation… love, had never been a part of Bella's life. Until she stumbled into Edward, that is. She giggled at the memory of their first meeting, even though tears continued to fall from her eyes. Because as complicated as the circumstances were, she knew that she had found something unique with Edward. Their relationship wouldn't be puppy love, not with the intensity between them, something inside told her Edward was _it_ for her. But what she _it_ for him? What a strange thing to be pondering fate and love when you're only fifteen.

A light tapping on her window startled Bella just as she was about to succumb to sleep. For a moment she thought she was imagining things, but the tapping resumed after a few seconds and she realized there was definitely someone outside.

Bella was uncertain about what she should do next. Rationally she knew she should call her dad and get him to check whatever was outside her window, but instinctively all she wanted to do was open the thing and discover who her mystery night visitor was.

"You're so going to regret this," Bella muttered as she came closer to the window and opened the drapes. She squealed when she encountered a very wet Edward sitting on a big branch just outside her window, but quickly recovered and lifted the bottom sash to let him in.

Edward stumbled inside Bella's room, almost losing his footing due to exhaustion and his water-logged sneakers. Thankfully he managed to enter her bedroom without causing an accident or making too much noise.

"You know, you should be careful having that branch right outside your window. If I can climb it with wet sneakers it's probably not a very good idea to sleep with your window open," Edward commented as he took in Bella's room. It wasn't anything like he had imagined it. Based on Alice's room he had thought that all girl's rooms were littered with posters of popular actors and musicians, fashion magazines, shoes and more clothes than they could possibly ever need. He should have known Bella was different; after all, she was in every other aspect.

Bella's room was full of books, a desk in which he could see the meadow drawings she had talk to him about, notebooks, and various art supplies. Yes, her room was very different from the norm.

Bella blinked surprised by how nonchalant Edward's attitude was towards the fact that he was in her room at eleven at night and completely drenched from head to toe.

"Um Edward, I think the tree is the least of my concerns at the moment. What are you doing here so late and so…so…wet?" Bella asked, gesturing to Edward's sopping-wet attire.

Edward smiled crookedly before replying, "In case you haven't noticed it's pouring outside, of course I'd be wet. Also, in my great escape plan I didn't factor rain or take into account that your house was so far. So yeah…my bad."

"Escape plan? Edward, what are you talking about?"

"Yeah," Edward moved back to stand by the window, "before discussing my grand escape would you mind lending me a towel and a t-shirt?"

"Of course!" Bella answered blushing, embarrassed by her lack of consideration. It wasn't exactly a warm night, so he was probably freezing in those wet clothes. This thought drew her attention towards Edward's aforementioned drenched garments and when her eyes landed on his wet t-shirt she turned fire-engine red. _Oh he's cold alright!_ She concluded as she gracelessly walked towards her closet to fetch some dry clothes for him.

Hoping to avoid hypothermia, Edward closed the window as he stood there waiting for Bella, and observed her as she raided her closet in search of clothes that would fit him. The results of her treasure hunt: a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants.

"Sorry, these are the only clothes I have that might fit," Bella apologized as she handed Edward her findings.

"That's alright," he joked. "Right now I'd rather be naked and wrapped in your duvet than keep these wet clothes on a moment longer…"

Bella's blush darkened at Edward's casual mention of being _naked_ in her presence.

Edward loved Bella's blush. He wanted to surrender to his impulse and caress her cheek, but his hands were freezing. He didn't want to make Bella flinch away from his touch; he wanted her to bask in it, so he decided it was best to change clothes first.

"Do you have a bathroom?" he asked.

"Yes, of course. That door to the right is my bathroom." Bella pointed to the door across the room. "You can change there."

Edward gave Bella a lopsided grin and grabbed the clothes, walking towards her bathroom. Bella's eyes followed Edward's retreating figure until he reached the door, winked, and closed it.

Bella felt light-headed and flushed. She briefly wondered if someone had turned up the heat and resisted the urge to fan herself. Edward was being playful and so very tempting. The mere idea of him behind that door changing clothes made her all sorts nervous, but in a good way.

She had never been interested in what girls her age enjoyed. She had never felt the inclination to swoon over a boy or draw little hearts in her notebook like other girls in her school, but when she was around Edward she felt that and _more_. She felt more alive, more real, more connected. The world had seemed foreign and threatening to her in the past, but not anymore. With Edward she felt capable of defeating anything, achieving anything, becoming anything.

She lay down in bed, closing her eyes, imagining what it would feel like to kiss Edward in a different way, more passionately. When they had shared their first kiss in the meadow, she had taken great pleasure in it. Yet, with Edward she always wanted more. When they were just getting to know one another, holding hands made her want to hug him, hugging him made her want to breathe in his scent, and breathing in his scent made her want to kiss him wholeheartedly.

Kissing him awoke dormant urges within her - she wanted more. She just wasn't sure of what more _was_. She never was sure when she was away from Edward. When she was with him everything seemed easy, natural, unpracticed. Only with him she was capable of acting on her instincts, not her thoughts. With him she was free to be herself.

Suddenly, warm lips touched hers, lips she knew and craved. She opened her eyes to green, soulful ones that captivated her; drew her like a moth to the flame. And aflame she was, because this kiss was different from her first. She could feel it in the urgency of Edward's lips, in the way his tongue would tentatively peek and graze her lower lip, asking permission to explore uncharted territories. She could feel it in the way her whole body tingled even though Edward was supporting his weight on his arms. The only parts of their bodies touching were their lips.

She wanted more and she wanted it now. With that thought in mind she grabbed Edward's arms, forcing him to fall over her.

He tried to struggle, so as not to crush her. He was much too heavy to lie on top of her like she seemed to want so instead he made himself fall to the side, and without breaking the kiss brought Bella on top of him. The feel of her body against his made him feel like he was slowly burning, like a dying ember being rekindled by a gentle breeze. The fire was slow-building, but oh so hot.

Bella wanted to be closer, she needed to get closer. Riotous feelings battled inside her, feelings she didn't recognize, but were strong and loud. They screamed inside her mind: _kiss him, touch him, taste him_.

She had never kissed anyone besides Edward, and this was only their second kiss, but somehow she just knew he would enjoy her hand pulling his hair, grabbing behind his neck and kneading. She just knew he would groan if she gently bit his lower lip and brushed her tongue against it. She felt as if she were possessed.

Edward felt crazed. He didn't quite understand what was happening to him. At first, when he had come out of the bathroom and kissed Bella, it was on a whim. She had looked so pretty with her eyes closed. She looked like Sleeping Beauty and he felt like waking her with a kiss. But things were escalating; he didn't feel in control of himself anymore. He kissed, nipped, groaned, and caressed. He was doing those things, his body was doing everything, but he wasn't the one calculating the moves.

However, his worried musings were short lived when Bella finally opened her mouth and their tongues met. He felt so drunk with sensation, the Universe could have self-imploded at that very instant and he wouldn't have noticed.

They kept at this pace for several minutes, both unwilling to break the connection first, but gradually regaining their wits. Their kiss couldn't continue for much longer, they unhurriedly broke apart when their need for fresh air defeated their need to remain glued together.

"Whoa!" Bella said, dropping by Edward's side.

"I know," he agreed as he struggled to get his breathing back to normal. He felt like he had been running a marathon. Out of the blue, Bella started to giggle next to him.

"What's so funny?" Edward propped himself up on his side and turned to look at her. "Was it my kissing expertise?" he asked, amused.

"Nope," Bella answered with a beautiful smile that made Edward's heart stop for a second. "I just think we must be insane to be making out like that in my bedroom when my parents are sleeping down the hall."

"I didn't plan it; it just sort of happened," Edward admitted with a sheepish grin as he lowered his head back to the bed. Bella turned and they were face to face smiling like fools. They both knew this and couldn't care less.

"You know," Bella began, "whenever I'm around you, I forget about everything – my problems, the fact that my parents could walk in on us in any second, or that you're in my room at night, and I still have no idea why you're here. When you kiss me or touch me, everything else takes second place. I think…" she trailed off, "I think that logically, I should be more scared but I'm too giddy to feel frightened right now."

"My answer to that could be summed up with _ditto_ Bella, because I feel exactly the same way," Edward confessed, gently pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear. Bella shivered slightly at the contact of his electrified fingers with the sensitive skin behind her ear.

"I'm glad we're on the same page then," Bella muttered, once again trapped in Edward's enchanting forest-green orbs. They were like beams of light drawing Bella to him, to his lips.

Before she could get sucked in once again, Edward blinked giving Bella a few precious seconds to recover her brain function and ask, "Why are you here so late Edward?"

Edward sighed heavily, rolled on his back, dropped his head back to the bed, and closed his eyes. "Well, I needed to see you and discuss with you some things my mom told me about Marie and Anthony. So I escaped my Ivory Tower and walked all the way here, in the rain, may I add." He opened his eyes and offered a small smile.

Bella's heart clenched a little imagining Edward walking all alone, from his house to hers. Granted nothing was too far away in Forks but it was at least a mile long walk and in the rain too. Remembering a particular part of Edward's explanation, she inquired about it, "What do you mean _escaped_ _your Ivory Tower_?"

"Um…it was a reference to this book I read as a kid, _Neverending Story_? You see there was this princess who lived in an Ivory Tower, not that I'm saying I'm a princess..." Edward's rant was interrupted by Bella's hand covering his mouth.

"Edward, I know what you meant about the Ivory Tower, I was referring to the _escaped_ part of your story." Bella stated with a heavy sigh, uncovering Edward's mouth to let him speak.

"Sorry?" Edward said with an impish grin plastered in his handsome face. However, all mirth abandoned him when he thought about what his mom had done. It had been the epitome of control freak in his opinion, and he really didn't want to share with Bella how crazy she had been acting since this morning. But deceiving Bella, even if it was lying by omission, made him uncomfortable. So he gathered strength and relayed the afternoon events at his house – the story his mother had told him, how he had been sent up to his room for not agreeing that Bella's whole family was to blame for Marie's actions and how his mother had finally locked him in his room.

"Just as I was about to give up I sat by my window and had one of those ridiculous light-bulb moments," Edward continued with his story and felt like laughing at the silliness of his escape plan. "There's a trellis just outside my window, it doesn't reach all the way to the ground but it gets close enough so once I climbed down I was able to jump."

Bella's eyes widened at this part, imagining Edward jumping from great heights wasn't doing anything good for her state of mind, in fact, she felt sick imagining all the ways that jump could have gone wrong.

Edward, sensing Bella's concern, gathered her in his arms and kissed her forehead gently in an attempt to reassure her. Nothing had happened. He was perfectly fine. So he continued undeterred by the brief pause, "So that's when my plan started to fail. I had decided to walk all the way here, but it started to rain, which was fine, a light drizzle is pretty common in this town most of the time. However, just when I thought it could be worse the heavens opened. Added to the fact that it was pitch black out it took me twice as long as normal to get here. Then I realized I didn't know if your parents felt the same about my family, so I couldn't knock on your door. Luckily, I got a break when I figured out which was your window, and had the brilliant idea of climbing the tree outside it."

"Wait. How did you know which window was mine?" Bella inquired, nuzzling Edward's chest. Being this close to him, in his arms made her heart soar and her body temperature rise, which was completely incongruent with the way her body was covered in goose bumps.

Edward's whole body tensed. Bella nuzzling him, breathing so close to his neck made his mind fill with improper thoughts. Still, he basked in her closeness and in how comfortable she seemed to feel around him. They were completely in sync.

He lowered his mouth to Bella's ear and whispered, "Yours was the only window with purple drapes and the lights on, lucky guess."

Bella's shivered encased in Edward's arms and he smiled against her neck, kissing it lightly. After a few seconds of enjoying their closeness, Bella spoke again.

"My parents don't hate your family. My mom told me she actually felt sorry for your mom, because she obviously hadn't got over the past. She told me you were welcome to come here whenever you wanted. I'm not sure she meant this late though."

Edward smirked, hugging Bella tighter to him. "I'm glad at least one set of our parents are sane. My only hope now is that my dad doesn't agree with mom. Otherwise, I might have to move in with my brother."

"Edward!" Bella admonished. "Don't say that! No matter what, your mother loves you. Her love may be misguided, she may scare me to death, but at the end of the day she loves you, and I'm sure your dad does too."

"Not enough to let me make my own decisions and my own mistakes. What does my mom think? That she can protect me from all that can be remotely harmful for me. I'm fifteen and even I know that's a ridiculous expectation."

"I know Edward, but she's going to try nonetheless, until she realizes how mistaken she is. We'll just have to be brave and endure it while she comes around."

Again there was a brief pause before Edward broke the silence, and asked, "What do you think Marie and Anthony want from us? Why do you think they are making us dream about their past?"

Bella had been wondering the same thing since she had come up to her room. She had yet to reach a satisfying answer, "I don't know. Your guess is as good as mine. I imagine, based on all the ghost books I've read that maybe they left some sort of unfinished business and they want us to finish it. Now the question is: how do they expect us to do that?"

"I guess we could start by researching them, things that our parents wouldn't tell us. We can go to the library and check out the newspaper clippings from the day they died. I could even ask Tanya and Jacob. They probably went to High school with them, and now that the cat is out of the bag, they'll probably tell me what they know," Edward replied looking straight at Bella's eyes, which suddenly widened.

"I have an idea!" she said jumping up, grabbing Edward's hand and pulling him to his feet. Not dropping his hand she headed for the door.

"Where are we going?" Edward hissed, knowing her parents were down the hall. No matter how cool they were about their friendship, they wouldn't be thrilled about him being in her bedroom at night.

"Stop being such worrywart! My parents are the coolest you'll ever meet. They won't get mad, especially in your situation. Which reminds me; won't your mom come straight here when she doesn't find you in your room?" Bella asked, stopping and turning to face Edward.

"I don't think so. Normally, she just grounds me until I agree with her. She probably thinks a night of sulking in my bedroom will make me _see the light,_ so to speak. Thus, she probably won't figure out that I'm gone until tomorrow," Edward responded smirking at the brilliancy of his plan.

"Wipe that smirk off your face; even if you're right she will almost certainly call the National Guard when she figures out you aren't in your room. We'll still have to face her wrath at some point."

Edward brought Bella to him, hugging her to his body. "I don't care if she calls the president, she won't keep me away from you. Especially over something that happened forever ago. I refuse to let my life be ruled by events in which I had no participation or blame. What's done is done. Keeping me apart from you won't bring Anthony back to life, and you aren't to blame for what your aunt did or didn't do."

"That's a lovely thought Edward but you saw your mom this morning. She hates my family and me by association. She won't make our lives easy," Bella mumbled against his chest.

"I know," Edward sighed, "but would you rather stop seeing each other?"

"Of course not!" Bella exclaimed, hugging him tighter. "I don't think that's even an option anymore."

"I know what you mean," Edward agreed.

They stood in the same spot for a brief moment before Bella remembered they had abandoned the comfort of her bed for a reason.

"Come!" she said, dragging Edward behind her.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see," Bella responded, giving him a mischievous look.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"What is this place?" Edward asked in between coughing fits. Clouds of dust were evidently flying around the darkened space they were climbing to.

Bella had directed him to a hatch which led to the dark space. He knew she was right in front of him, but couldn't be sure since there was no other lighting in the secluded space than the provided by a small window at the end of the room and the flashing lightning of the storm roaring outside that filtered through it.

"Isn't it obvious?" Bella said with amusement in her voice. She was viewing this as an adventure of discovery. She was intrigued by the haunting presence of her aunt all over her life. She had never met Marie, and yet she haunted her dreams, her house, her family, and even her blossoming relationship with Edward. It was time she explored this house and the secrets about Marie that could be hidden within.

"Not to me it's not," Edward answered petulantly.

Bella stifled a laugh, amused by Edward's antics.

"It's an attic! Duh!" she declared, turning on a light bulb in the middle of the room.

They both blinked as their eyes grew accustomed to the new source of light.

When they were finally able to see what lay before them, they were faced with a multitude of dusty boxes and a full length mirror that immediately caught Bella's attention.

"Wow, this is gorgeous!" she gushed, moving closer to the mirror.

"It's probably really old," Edward asserted, gently caressing the surface of the carved wood.

"Probably," Bella murmured, mesmerized by the old-fashioned mirror. It seemed so familiar. She was filled by a sense of remembrance, as if this was not the first time she had stood in front of this particular mirror.

Bella's mind was invaded by a fog, a fog that covered something inside it, something that wanted to resurface. She would have sworn she could hear someone playing a piano in the distance. She could hear a melody that made her eyes tear up. She didn't know the tune's name, but she could feel it tugging at a memory which invaded all of her senses. She felt wrapped in it, as if the melody were a cocoon that engulfed her, transporting her to a distant place.

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asked, snapping her out of her trance.

"Huh? What?" Bella asked, still dazed by the poignant but indistinct memory of the song.

"You're crying," Edward whispered, brushing his thumb across her cheek, wiping away her tears. Bella's cheeks heated up under Edward's inquisitive stare and gentle touch.

She cleared her throat after a few moments and replied, "I don't know what came over me. I guess I got swallowed by the memories in this place. Everything here," she pointed towards the boxes and furniture scattered around the attic, "was my grandparents', and Marie's stuff is probably here too. That's why I brought you up here. I think we should start looking for clues here. Maybe we'll find photographs, or letters, something to help us unveil what Marie and Anthony want from us."

"So, we agree that we are being haunted by ghosts?" Edward asked.

"I don't know. I never really believed in ghosts before this day. But we have to agree that something strange is up with these dreams and with Marie and Anthony's story. Also, I'm not sure I believe everything our parents told us is what really happened. Why else are we being haunted in our sleep?" Bella replied, turning towards a couple of boxes and starting her search.

"Here," she said, handing a box to Edward, "look inside this box while I look in this one."

Edward nodded and proceeded to rummage around the contents of the box.

"Look!" Edward said after a short while, handing Bella a framed photograph. "Marie."

Bella stared at the photo in silence. She felt sadness surround her heart as she studied the features of her aunt. She could see little bits of her mom in her, even bits of herself, and that frightened her slightly. If Marie had indeed killed Anthony, did that mean she was capable of murder as well?

"She was very beautiful," Edward declared, drawing Bella from her reverie.

"Yes, she was," she replied simply.

They continued with their search for a few more minutes until Bella came across a notebook much like the ones she kept. She flipped through it and a shiver ran down her spine. There were drawings and poems that looked like something she could have written, all signed: _Marie_. Apparently, she was more like her aunt than she could have ever imagined.

"What is that?" Edward asked.

"It's one of my aunt's notebooks or so it seems, looks like she used her notebooks much like I do, like a journal slash drawing pad. It's filled with poems, drawings, look even some diary entries," Bella said, pointing to a particular one.

"The date places that entry seventeen years ago, around the time Marie and Anthony were broken up and he was living in New York," Edward asserted as he read the words over Bella's shoulder.

"Would you mind reading it aloud?" Bella requested, not sure she was ready to read about that particularly dark period of her aunt's life without Edward's support.

"Of course," he nodded as he picked up the notebook from Bella's hand and started to read out loud.

"_Can someone live without one's soul? It feels like I'm doing that. _He's_ gone. _He_ has been gone for a while now, and my days seem like a duplicate of the previous one. I get up in the morning. I go to school and can't focus. __**Dimitri**__ picks me up. __**He**__ gives me what I need to be anesthetized, and I satisfy __**his**__ more primal needs. I feel sick, but I can't break the cycle, because I need to be numb to bear the pain that plagues my spirit or what is left of it. The part _he_ left behind, the broken part, not the beautiful one _he_ used to love. _

"_I wish death would take me already. I'm too much of a coward to kill myself. I guess I've grown used to paying for my mistakes. Even if I die, even if death takes mercy on me and ends my pitiful existence, I'll still find new ways to torture myself, because it's what I do best. I was born with a self-destruct button, and I pressed it the night I broke _his _heart." _

"Wow, that was intense," Edward declared after finishing that entry. He took one look at Bella and saw her eyes brimming with tears.

"Oh Bella," he crooned as he surrounded her with his arms. Bella sobbed into Edward's chest, touched by her aunt's written words. Never had she felt such sadness during her waking life. The only point of comparison for this pain was the sorrow she felt during the only dream she remembered. She sought Edward's comforting warmth like a thirsty man in the desert seeks water. She needed him now more than ever. She needed to confirm he was real.

And in each others embrace they remained, unaware of the wind or the lightning outside, oblivious to the noises of the night. They clung to each other realizing that they would need the other to survive what was to come.

So wrapped up were they in their little bubble, they never even noticed that the reflection of the boy consoling the sobbing girl in the mirror that Bella had admired – was not theirs.

* * *

**A/N** Jeez! *wipes sweat of brow* This update about killed me. This week I was one Beta, and one pre-reader down, since _**I decided**_ not to bother them. They are probably having a blast as I write these lines. *waves at **Dante Levine** and **Lemonmartinis*** They are meeting with a bunch of other Fanfic lovers in DC (USA) and I heard rumors of scheduled debauchery. *Winks* We shall see if the rumors prove to be true.

So, I want to thank **Monamour**, and especially **Rhian0000** who not only pre-reads for me, but also chastises me when my arse needs a swift kick.

Any and all mistakes are entirely **my** fault **always**, and no one else's.

I know I'm fail, but prepare to be Review-Reply-Spammed as soon as I get Chapter 9 written…anticipated apologies.

This week I will like to rec a story by one of the authors who popped my Fanfiction cherry: **Absolution** by **Miss Baby**

**Link: http : / / www . fanfiction . net / s / 6054645 / 1 / Absolution**

_Just delete the extra spaces._

Is a **Lawyerward** fic, **WIP**, so if you are in need of new reading material give this story a shot, I'm sure you'll like it.

I'm on Twitter as **ange_de_laube **I post any news there, at the **Twilighted thread** and also in my **Blog**(links on profile)

Thank you for the kind words regarding the loss of my cousin, for taking the time to read, recommend, and review this story.

(Much Love)

**Ange**


	10. You're mine

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**This plotline, however, is mine. I really don't see the point in stealing something I'm already providing for free, so please refrain from plagiarizing this story. Thank you. **

**Finally, if you are not old enough to vote, you probably shouldn't read my fic. It's accordingly rated and that should be enough to deter you. However, I know how curious teens can be. I will not take responsibility for you reading this if you aren't over the legal age. That's your parents' job not mine. **

**To all those old enough to vote, happy reading!**

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**Chapter ****9: ****You're mine**

"**These flowers, which were splendid and sprightly, waking in the dawn of the morning, in the evening will be a pitiful frivolity, sleeping in the cold night's arms."**

_Pedro Calderon de la Barca._

Light filtered through Bella's closed eyelids. She felt the sun's rays warming her skin. She heard birds chirping and the sounds of a stream in the distance. She heard tree leaves dancing to the rhythm of the wind. She smelled the tantalizing scent of blossoming flowers and grass around her. She tasted the freshness of spring in the air. The forest was making music; music that captivated her senses and spoke to her heart.

Warm, electric fingers caressed her body. She could feel them leaving a trail from her fingertips, to her knuckles, to her arms, to her neck, to her jaw, and finally resting on her cheek. The fingers brushed her flushed face, touching her as if she were a precious flower, frail and beautiful, a flower that could be destroyed by the slightest excess of force. The fingers worshipped her.

"Open your eyes," a sweet voice crooned. The voice was magical and its command was like 'open sesame' to Bella's eyes. They couldn't resist the compulsion to open and greet the owner of that bewitching voice.

Slowly, Bella opened her eyes. She had to blink several times before she got used to the glare of the sunlight that threatened to blind them. When she finally did, instead of the face she expected to see, she encountered a face that had only starred in her nightmares thus far.

"Anthony," Bella's voice whispered, but it wasn't the voice she was familiar with. It was slightly different, and she immediately recognized it as her aunt Marie's.

"Welcome back Sleeping Beauty," Anthony grinned widely, with a blissful expression that confused Bella. She had grown used to a pained one; the happiness painting his features seemed foreign.

Marie's feelings were also out of the ordinary. In Bella's last dream Marie had been feeling indescribable sorrow. Now, Bella could only feel peace from her aunt. Peace, happiness, pleasure, mischief.

"If I'm really Sleeping Beauty why hasn't my Prince kissed me awake?" Marie asked, her tone playful.

"Oh really?" Anthony taunted as he moved himself on top of Marie's body, "is that the game we're playing? Oh well, if a kiss is what the Princess wants then a kiss the Princess shall receive."

Anthony's lips descended on Marie's. Bella could feel the same electrifying sizzle she felt whenever she kissed Edward.

Bella felt herself, or Marie more like it, get lost in the kiss. She could feel herself get carried away with the onslaught of sensations Anthony's lips created. Bella was shocked by how alike it felt to kissing Edward. It was a surreal experience, and in a way, she knew she _was_ kissing him, since she was certain he was another spectator in this dream, only through Anthony's eyes. However, what was startling about the experience was not the similarities, but the differences.

The second kiss Edward and she had shared felt more potent than their first one. They had crossed many invisible boundaries with that kiss. They had pushed themselves more, enjoyed themselves thoroughly, but they had still stopped the situation from going much further. She had felt a need, buried deep inside her that wanted to take over but she had resisted it. Her body was ready for more, but her mind was not.

In this kiss, however, both mind and body were working in tandem. No disagreements, no differences; they both wanted the same thing and were ready to take it.

Anthony's hands wandered to places Edward's had not dared to explore. Bella could feel her skin igniting where he touched. He placed his right hand around her neck, his thumb gently caressing her jaw, as his tongue coaxed her mouth to open. Bella felt it all as Marie happily obliged to Anthony's request, and whimpered as soon as his tongue entered her mouth. Anthony's left hand ventured lower, descending at a torturously slow pace, touching her in places that made her entire body burst into flames.

"Mon amour…" Anthony moaned as his lips abandoned Marie's, but not the rest of her, for they sensuously started to draw a trail from her jaw to her clavicle. Marie gasped and writhed beneath him, while he lazily explored her.

Bella felt Marie's hands abandon the death grip they had on the blanket she had been lying on, and place them on Anthony's lower back. She could feel how they leisurely ascended underneath Anthony's shirt, greedily exploring with growing fascination the secrets Anthony's smooth back hid.

She felt how his muscles rippled under her touch, the flickers of scorching fire between her fingertips and his skin. They moaned, gasped and groaned as their hands and mouths wandered each other's bodies.

Anthony's hands continued to move lower, his right gripping Marie's waist, his left descending even lower and hitching her right leg around his waist. Marie cried out softly when her lower half came in direct contact with Anthony's. Bella felt ashamed at how much she was enjoying herself through Marie's feelings. This level of primal need wasn't something she was prepared for yet, but Marie's slightly older body seemed more than ready and willing to continue.

Anthony pressed himself harder to her. He grunted as he rocked his hips against hers, creating a delicious friction between them. Bella could feel how Marie's blood caught fire, heat pooled in her belly and spread through her body like molten lava coursing through her veins.

Marie was drowning in sensations, Bella along with her. Anthony was everywhere. He was in the sunlight. He was part of the trees and the creek. He was part of Marie. She could feel him, his touch, his breathing, all of him under her very skin. He burned her from the inside out.

Marie could no longer keep her eyes open. Try as she might, they closed on their own. The feelings exploding within her were overpowering the core of her being. She was held captive with no escape, not that she wished for one.

"I love you Anthony," Bella heard Marie's voice sigh as she sunk her short nails into his skin. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, poppet," an unfamiliar voice groaned, and Bella felt Marie freeze. _That voice_, Bella thought, her soul being filled with dread. She didn't know who the owner was, but somehow, deep down she remembered the voice hatefully.

Slowly, Marie's eyes opened, revealing to Bella who was lying on top of her now. Cobalt eyes greeted her instead of the emerald ones she had desperately hoped to see. Marie started to squirm, trying to free herself from the strange man's hold as fast as she could. _Now_ didn't seem fast enough for Bella.

The man was handsome, had dark blonde short hair, sharp features, and a lean body. But there was a coldness about him, a grim aura that surrounded him. He looked like a demon; seductive, predatory, dangerous.

He smiled cruelly. He was enjoying Marie's struggle, Bella could see it in his wintry blue eyes.

"You know I love it when you wriggle under me, my poppet," the man sneered. "You'll just get me more excited."

Marie thrashed about in an effort to throw the man off her, but he was too heavy.

Marie's desperation grew, as did Bella's. _What was Marie trying to show her with this dream? What was this guy going to do to her?_

Bella watched with growing panic the man's lips descend to Marie's neck. She felt disgusted when he nipped her earlobe, licking and sucking, probably leaving a mark.

He grabbed Marie's wrists when she tried to push him away, and placed each of her hands above her head, holding them there with one hand.

Bella felt helpless as he proceeded to place open-mouthed kisses all over her exposed neckline, tasting her, making her feel dirty. She felt hot tears falling down her cheeks, Marie's cheeks. She wanted to wake up before things could go any further. It was one thing to know through Marie's diaries how tragic her life had been, another entirely to experience it with her.

His mouth ascended the length of Marie's neck, reaching the side of her head, while his free hand descended lower, found one of her legs, and started to stroke her inner thigh under her dress, much too close to Marie's most intimate place. Bella felt ill.

He positioned his lips next to her ear and murmured directly into it, "You're mine, and I will find you wherever you go. Remember that my sweet _Isabella_."

Bella screamed.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Edward was stirred awake from his dream by an embarrassing problem he really didn't need while sleeping next to the only girl he had ever liked.

The dream had felt so real that he was a bit confused when he opened his eyes and found himself in Bella's room, lying in her bed, instead of the meadow where he had been.

He had had another dream involving Anthony and Marie, but it had been so different from the last one, as different as night was to day.

He felt Anthony's happiness like his own, his awe as he admired Marie's beauty while she laid on a blanket and the sun rays bathed her skin, making it glow.

Last night, when he had found Marie's picture, he had seen some similarities between her and Bella. Similarities he hadn't been able to appreciate in his last nightmare due to how poor the lighting had been and how upset he had felt. In this new dream though, the moment Marie opened her eyes he recognized them immediately. They weren't just any brown eyes, they were Bella's.

He had felt strangely guilty when Anthony started kissing Marie, like he was cheating on Bella with her own aunt. They hadn't labeled their relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend yet, but he had every intention of asking as soon as he could. Still, in the end, he reasoned he _was_ kissing Bella, since she was probably experiencing the kiss through Marie's eyes, as bizarre as the whole thing was. Thus, he allowed himself to enjoy the moment. It felt a lot like kissing Bella anyways, so imagining it was her wasn't all that hard. Speaking of which…Edward looked at his lap and groaned.

Of all mornings to wake up feeling like this, it had to be this morning, the one morning he woke up next to Bella. He blushed in embarrassment and turned to look at the girl who inspired such feelings in him. She was so striking in her sleep. Always was – but there was something about the vulnerability she displayed when she was slumbering that made her beauty more ethereal. She was a fairy tale princess, _his_ princess if he had any say in it.

He carefully lifted Bella's right arm, which was lying across his chest, and placed it over the pillow he had been using. Bella snuggled into it and Edward smiled, touched by how adorable she looked nuzzling his pillow. He slowly rose from the bed, trying not to wake her, and walked to her bathroom.

Once inside, he locked the door behind him, and considered his options to solve his… _problem_ before Bella woke up.

In the past, when he had encountered such a situation, he had taken a long cold shower to make it go away. At that very moment he didn't think that was a feasible solution though. Bella would surely wake up the minute she heard the shower, and ask why he was taking one, in her bathroom, so early in the morning.

He really didn't want to answer that question.

He knew of another solution, but the idea of using _that one_ deeply mortified him given where he was.

The only idea he had left was trying to will the problem away. He wasn't sure that would work, but it was the only plan he had thought of that he could put into action without making any noise or embarrassing himself.

He sat over the toilet seat, and thought of anything that would take his mind away from the kiss he had experienced in his dream and the gorgeous girl sleeping a few steps away.

"Think Edward, think…it has to be something gross or creepy," he murmured to himself. He remembered the time Alice captured a toad and kissed it, shuddering at the memory. She was five, and had argued it was a Prince and she had to kiss it to turn him back to his human form. That had been one of the most disgusting things he had seen in his entire life. Sadly, it didn't do the job and Edward grumbled in frustration.

"Okay, think of something repulsive," he commanded himself. He thought back to the time he went fishing with his brother and they had hit a deer on the way back with Jacob's truck. That had been an outright revolting experience. He had been twelve, and had never seen so much blood in his life, not even in movies.

The memory was finally making his problem disappear and Edward was beginning to feel relief flooding his system when suddenly he heard Bella moaning.

He quickly jumped to his feet, and ran to check on her.

He found her writhing in bed. Making agonizing noises as if she were in so much pain she could no longer make her voice obey. He rapidly realized that maybe they didn't necessarily share the same dream every night. Perhaps while he had been having a very nice one, even with the uncomfortable situation he had found himself in after it, she had been having a nightmare.

He sat next to Bella and briefly considered the best way to wake her up without startling her too much. However, when her cries increased in volume he realized he had to rouse her no matter how. Her distress weighed heavier on his heart than his own could ever do.

So as gently as he could manage he picked her up in his arms, hugged her closely to him and rubbed her back, trying to soothe her.

"Shush…I'm here, wake up, my love. I have you," he cooed next to her ear, placing a soft kiss on her temple.

Bella immediately stopped thrashing and wrapped her arms around Edward. He wasn't sure if she was awake or if she was still dreaming but he allowed her a few seconds before asking, "Are you awake now, Bella?"

He felt Bella sigh and snuggle against his chest before she lifted her head and directed her sleepy gaze at him.

"I think I'm still dreaming because you're not supposed to be in my bed or be this pretty so early in the morning," Bella replied, giving Edward a weary smile.

Edward chuckled at Bella's obviously drowsy response. Relief filled his heart, as he hugged her to him tightly, burying his nose in her hair. It smelled lovely, like strawberries and cream.

Hugging Bella so close, smelling her sweet scent felt right. With her Edward felt no doubts, had no obscure secrets hidden inside his head, he felt only certainty.

"What were you dreaming about?" Edward asked after a short silence.

Bella groaned. She really didn't want to relive the terrible nightmare she had just experienced but she knew it possibly affected Edward as well, since it dealt with Anthony and Marie. So, she reluctantly described it to Edward.

Edward remained silent during her relation, still hugging her to him and tightening his hold when she got to the really creepy part of the dream.

Only after she finished did he speak.

"I had the same dream, but I woke up during the kiss. I didn't have any dreams of Marie with someone else at the meadow."

Bella thought about it for a second, processing what Edward had told her, before she asked, "So, you woke up before I did? What did you do? Did you by any chance leave the bed?"

Edward blushed, freaking blushed. He was glad that the position they were sitting in didn't give Bella a good view of his face so he didn't need worry about her seeing his embarrassment plastered all over his face.

"Um… yes… I had… you know… I had to go to the bathroom."

Bella considered this and was abruptly hit with an idea. She broke apart from Edward's arms and looked at him straight in the eyes.

For a moment Edward felt a rush of panic run through him. He was sure Bella had figured out _why_ exactly he had to go to the bathroom first thing in the morning, but before he could apologize for his crudeness Bella spoke again.

"Don't you see it Edward? When we were together we dreamed of Anthony and Marie's happier times, but the minute you woke up and left the bed my dream changed from romantic to horrific. I'd be willing to bet that if the roles were reversed, and I were the one who left the bed before you, you would have had a nightmare about Anthony's darkest days. I think I'm beginning to see a pattern here."

Edward blinked several times before his brain could catch up with Bella's revelation. He had to agree that it sort of made sense, but they would need to test the theory a couple of times before being completely sure.

"Okay, that makes sense," he agreed, "but we will have to experiment with that hypothesis a couple of times before I'm completely sold on it. What I'm more worried about right now is how these dreams seem to be growing in intensity since we can remember them. Also, I'm not sure I like the idea of having to go through what Marie and Anthony did. Based on what little we know about them they weren't exactly the happiest people on Earth."

"And what do you propose we do? Have a séance and ask them to pretty please leave us alone? Somehow, I'm not sure that's going to work." Bella huffed, crossing her arms in front of her like a grouchy three year old.

"I don't know, Bella," Edward responded, smirking, amused by her childish reaction, "that might actually work. Do you have an Ouija board hidden anywhere in this house?" He could barely contain the laugh that wanted to escape him when he saw Bella's face redden in a mixture of annoyance and merriment.

"Shut up!" she shouted, smacking him hard on his right arm.

"Ouch! That hurt you know? Besides," he said with a roguish expression, "you said I looked too pretty. Do you want to ruin my pretty biceps?" Edward proceeded to flex said biceps.

Bella stared for a few seconds, truly mesmerized by his clothed bicep, but was eventually able to regain the use of her brain, and threw herself at him, making him fall back with her on top.

Edward froze up under Bella's body, what had started as child's play quickly turned into something more. His breathing turned ragged, his mouth parched. With Bella above him, her open mouth hovering over his lips, gasping softly – he suddenly felt dizzy.

Before either could act on their desires, someone knocked on Bella's door.

"Bella honey?" they heard someone call from behind the door. Bella immediately recognized her mother's voice and moved so fast from her position over Edward that she fell off the bed.

"Ow!" Bella yelped as she landed on her behind.

"Are you okay?" Edward murmured, looking down at her trying to asses whether she was hurt or not.

"Yes, I'm used to falling a lot. Remember how we met? Now go hide in my closet. My mom can't see you!"

Edward quickly rose and entered Bella's walk in closet, noiselessly shutting the door behind him.

Bella got up from her floor, checked herself on her vanity mirror, and opened the door for her mother, trying to look as innocent as she could manage.

"Hi, Mom," she said in her sweetest voice.

"Hi honey," Renee answered with a broad smile, kissing her daughter gently on the cheek before entering her room.

Bella followed her mother closely, trying to obstruct her view of the closet door at the same time as trying to look as if nothing out of the ordinary was taking place.

"How was your night?" Renee asked kindly, sitting on Bella's unmade bed.

"It was great mom, super. I dreamed I was on a date with Orlando Bloom. He took me to that restaurant in Cali that I liked so much when we went there on vacation last year," Bella lied. She knew her lying skills were appalling but she had to try for Edward's sake. Unfortunately, someone growled from inside her closet as soon as she finished her speech, completely ruining any hope of success.

"Edward, you can come out now," Renee called, shocking the teen in front of her and the one grumbling about stupid pirate movies hiding in the closet.

"How did you?" Bella began wide-eyed but was stopped by Renee's raised hand.

"Really, Bella? I'm your mom. I know what you're thinking before you even finish the thought. Of course, I knew you had someone in here. Just thank your lucky stars I was able to convince your dad to let the boy live when Carlisle called twenty minutes ago telling us he was coming to pick up his son."

Bella opened and closed her mouth like a fish on dry land. She thought she had been so sneaky when all the time her mom knew and now thanks to Carlisle Cullen her dad knew too.

Edward slowly walked out of the closet, grabbed Bella's hand in reassurance, and met Renee's eyes. No matter what her parents or his had to say today they were in this together.

"Wow Bella," Renee gushed getting up, nearing the standing couple. "This boy is pretty. I say keep him."

"Mom!" Bella shouted, completely mortified.

Edward smirked and tightened his grip on Bella's hand, drawing her attention to him. "I bet your mom thinks I'm more handsome than Orlando Bloom, eh?"

"I was trying to protect your hiding place!" Bella protested.

"Kids, as cute as you two are fighting like this in the morning, breakfast is ready and Edward's dad will arrive any minute. So, go change into something presentable and I'll wait for you downstairs." Renee announced and exited the room, snickering to herself.

**-x-x-x-x-**

It was a tense breakfast in the Swan household.

Renee kept smiling a knowing smile as she sipped her coffee, looking between Edward, Bella and Charlie.

Charlie scowled as he cut his bacon into tiny pieces and chewed his food as if he had a grudge against it.

Bella's expression switched between blushing and frowning as she stole glances at Edward, keeping an eye on her father too.

Edward stubbornly stared at his plate, never raising his eyes from it for fear of Charlie's death glare.

They had explained Edward's situation to Bella's parents and although both had understood Edward's dilemma and didn't agree with Esme's methods, they also didn't think it was wise for him to walk to their home so late at night in the rain. Charlie had placed special emphasis in his belief that it was particularly dangerous for Edward to spend the night in his daughter's bed.

Edward had never been so frightened in his life.

Suddenly, a knock came from the front door and everyone stopped what they were doing.

It had to be Carlisle Cullen at the door.

Edward shot a panicked look at Bella and she gulped, nervous about what Edward's dad would have to say about his grand escape.

Carlisle was Edward's final hope to make his mother see reason and he wished with all his heart he didn't have to move in with Jacob and Tanya to be allowed Bella's company. He truly loved his parents and didn't want to have a fall-out with them.

"I'll get it," Charlie said before anyone could react and went to open the door.

"Good morning," Carlisle greeted, entering the Swan kitchen closely followed by Bella's dad.

"Good morning, Carlisle," Renee said with a stern face. She had told Bella and Edward that if need be she would talk with Carlisle and Esme herself to make them see how unreasonable their attitude was. The past was buried, it had been for a long time and it didn't make sense to keep playing the blame-game as the Cullens had been doing for the last fifteen years.

"Edward," Carlisle addressed his son.

"Dad."

Renee cleared her throat and leaned her head to one side signaling her husband to leave the room as she grabbed her daughter's hand to encourage her to follow.

"I think it's best if we leave them alone for a minute," she declared.

The Swans left the room, one by one.

Bella was the last one out the door and she directed a sympathetic look at Edward before closing the door behind her.

"Edward," Carlisle started with a severe tone, "what you did last night has to be the most completely idiotic thing you have done in your entire life."

Edward took on a defensive attitude, replying, "What was I supposed to do? Mom practically kidnapped me. She yelled at me for almost an hour because I didn't agree with her opinion of the Swans and then she locked me in my room. I needed to talk to Bella and she just expected me to do her bidding, like she always does."

Carlisle sighed heavily and raked his fingers angrily through his hair, pinching the bridge of his nose. Edward had inherited many of Carlisle's mannerisms and it showed more clearly in moments such as this one.

"I'm so sorry, son," Carlisle apologized. "We shouldn't have lied to you the way we did. I've always felt like a failure as a father, both to you as well as to Anthony. When he died your mother just… _broke_. She was so depressed I never thought I would get her back. Then she began to get better. Taking care of you seemed to take her mind off the tragedy and she showed signs of improvement. But every single time she would find a picture or something that would remind her of Anthony she would break down completely.

"One day, I just couldn't take it anymore so with Jacob's help I got rid of everything. Everything but Anthony's piano, Esme wouldn't let us take that."

"You're talking about my piano?" Edward asked, astonished by this new discovery.

"Yes, apparently musical talent runs in our family. Anthony was a very skilled pianist and he even took some summer courses at Juilliard. He adored that piano." Carlisle reminisced.

"Wow, I feel like a stranger in my own family. You kept so much from me."

"I know, son, and for that I'm sorry."

Father and son remained in silence for a few minutes, both unsure of what to say.

"How did mom react when she saw I was gone?" Edward asked, worried that Esme might be waiting in the car outside ready to burst in and let the Swans know exactly how she felt about them.

"She was asleep when I got home. She drunk a whole bottle of scotch it seems, and she is probably still sleeping off the hangover as we speak. She was lucid only long enough to tell me a little bit about your argument and to ask me to check on you. That's when I realized you weren't home and I guessed where you would be. Luckily, this is a small town and finding the Swans' phone number wasn't too difficult," Carlisle answered with obvious distress.

"I'm so sorry, Dad. I really didn't want to make her so mad but I couldn't just agree with her. Bella is special to me and I can't stop seeing her because mom tells me to."

"Is she?" Carlisle inquired. "Is she special enough to put your relationship with your mother at risk? My relationship with her if I choose to support you?"

"She's my life now," Edward answered matter-of-factly, leaving no room for doubt. He didn't want to choose between his love and his family, nor should he have to. Bella was not Marie.

"I see," Carlisle stated, turning pensive.

"Okay," he said after a short while. "I think we have abused the Swans' hospitality enough. It's time for us to go home."

Edward grabbed his cell and his keys, following his father to the foyer where the Swans were waiting.

"Everything okay?" Bella asked anxiously.

"Perfect," Carlisle responded before Edward could utter a word. "You seem like a lovely girl, Bella, and I have to commend your parents for raising you to be the young woman you are today. I think you will be a great influence on my son."

He was confident in his son's intuition. Edward was great at reading people, and wouldn't have Bella in such high esteem if she didn't deserve it.

Edward and Bella's smiles could have thawed all of Forks' snow on the bitterest of winter nights.

"So you're going to help me convince mom?" Edward asked enthusiastically.

Carlisle stood really close to Edward and whispered in his ear, "I cannot live without my life. I cannot live without my soul."

Edward blinked in surprise, he recognized the quote as part of Bella's favorite book _Wuthering Heights_ but didn't see how it was related.

Carlisle continued, speaking louder for everyone to hear, "I've lost one son already because we were too stubborn to accept his decision. I lost him almost a year before he died. I will not lose another."

**-x-x-x-x-**

Bella was sitting in a booth of Forks' biggest diner. It wasn't exactly the Space Needle restaurant but the Garden Burger she'd ordered looked promising.

She was waiting for Edward. They had agreed, before he left with his dad, that they would meet there and discuss their next course of action regarding their research into Marie and Anthony's past.

Moreover, she was dying to know how the talk between Carlisle and Esme had gone.

Bella was playing with a fry, dipping it in Ketchup and drawing happy faces on her plate with it. She was trying to distract herself from the nervousness all the waiting around was causing in her when she heard Alice's boisterous voice yell, "Bella!"

"Alice!" Bella turned around in her booth to be immediately assaulted by Alice in an enthusiastic hug. For someone so tiny she sure hugged tight.

"What are you doing here?" Alice asked, taking a seat next to her.

"I'm waiting for Edward we were supposed to meet here," Bella checked her watch. "Ten minutes ago actually."

"Weird…" Alice commented, taking a fry from Bella's plate and eating it. "That boy is always on time. I used to tease him about it when we were kids. I told him he was adopted and that he was really Swiss. It annoyed him to no end. "

"Well, yeah. Ten minutes is not that long. I'm sure he's on his way. And you Alice? What are you doing here alone?"

Alice whole face lit up. "In fact, I'm not alone or at least I won't be when my future husband arrives."

"Huh?" Bella asked confused.

"Oh, Bella, if you only knew! Yesterday, when I was helping my mom with her errands I met this boy Bella… Gah! He's just so dreamy!" Alice giggled, looking and acting very much her age.

Bella smiled in understanding because she often felt the same way about Edward, even though she wasn't as nearly as squeaky about it as Alice was.

"And speaking of the devil," Alice said aiming her eyes towards the door of the diner. Bella turned her neck just in time to see a tall, very attractive blonde boy walk through it.

Alice jumped from her seat and greeted the boy excitedly as if she had known him a lifetime, not the twenty four hours she had.

She grabbed his hand and dragged him to where Bella was sitting.

"Bella, this is my friend James Hunter. James, this is my friend Isabella Swan."

"Hi," Bella said, paying close attention to the boy's features.

He was beautiful, there was no denying it. He was a couple of inches shorter than Edward, which was still pretty tall. He had light blonde hair, flawless skin, a chiseled jaw and seemed pretty muscular for his age.

However, what made the hairs on the back of her neck rise and goose-bumps appear all over her flesh were his eyes. She knew those eyes. She had seen them before. He had the same ice-cold eyes as the man from her nightmare.

Bella's heart pumped erratically and a chill ran through her, freezing her to the spot. All sorts of alarm signals were triggered inside her, screaming 'Danger!'

And then he spoke.

"Good afternoon, sweet Isabella."

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**A/N **First of all, I want to let you know this Chapter is dedicated to my friend, and Beta **Monamour**. She's going through a very rough time at the moment. Her health is very poor and I ask you to please keep her on your prayers and thoughts. For more info and reports on her condition, please visit the thread **Raizie **kindly set up on Twilighted:

**http : / / www . twilighted . net / forum / ?f = 4&t = 11144&start = 160&st = 0&sk = t&sd = a**

_Just delete the spaces_

You can also leave messages of love and hope on the Blog her friend's set up for her: **http : / / faithexiststrayce . blogspot . com /**

___Just delete the spaces_

As you can infer from this, I can't promise a fixed schedule anymore. I'm doing all that I can to be able to update regularly, but once a week might not be possible anymore. Luckily, I have people who continue to help me, like **Rhian0000**, who beta'd this chapter, and **Lemonmartinis**, who pre-read it. Thank you guys, I don't know what I'd do without you *smooches*

All errors remaining in the final version are mine and no one else's.

**About something my pre-reader mentioned to me:** in the dream, Bella screamed whereas in RL she only moaned and grunted. I don't know about you guys but often, in my dreams, I can be doing karate or running, whereas at the same time, my body's only reaction is a jerk, or a soft kick. Dreamed reactions don't always equal RL reactions. In my experience at least.

**Also I've been asked about Anthony and Edward's age difference.** Anthony was almost 19 when he died. Edward as you know is 15. Why did Esme wait so long? Simply put: Esme had problems carrying pregnancies to term. When she had Anthony she thought that was it. She never expected to get pregnant almost two decades later, and she wasn't even trying. She already had a biological son, and an adopted one. Edward was an unexpected miracle.

**Some of the character's ages to guide you better:**

**Bella/Edward/Alice/James=** 15 years old.

**Tanya=** 34 years old  
**Jacob=** 35 years old

**Renee=** 36 years old  
**Charlie=** 40 years old

**Esme=** 52 years old  
**Carlisle=** 53 years old

**Rhian0000 **wrote a lovely review for **AS **on a new Fanfiction Webpage that's under construction. If you want to check it out you can go here:

**http : / / twilightfanfictionworld . com / Joomla / index . php?view = article&id = 71**

_Just delete the spaces_**  
**

I'm helping with some aspects of that page and I'm super-excited about it. **AS** is posted there as well.

Thank you for the reviews, alerts, favorites, and kind words,

(love)

**Ange**


	11. Complications

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**This plotline, however, is mine. I really don't see the point in stealing something I'm already providing for free, so please refrain from plagiarizing this story. Thank you.**

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**Chapter 10: ****Complications**

"**Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future."**

_Fulton Oursler_

In her 15 years of life, Bella had never felt fear; real pure undiluted fear. Charlie and Renee had always protected her, made her feel safe. Even at times, when her nightmares made her life difficult, she had never felt terror cooling her blood, freezing her, like she did now.

James' blue eyes cut through her like a million icicles. They pierced her soul, but not like Edward's eyes did. When Edward looked at her she felt warmth, happiness and adoration. She felt as if she were protected in a cocoon. Nothing could touch her when Edward was gazing at her, nothing could reach her. James' eyes stripped her bare. She felt like a bug under a microscope, being studied, analyzed. As if he was looking for weaknesses, possible points of attack. It unnerved her deeply.

"Do you know each other?" Alice asked, taking Bella out of her terrified stupor.

"No," James answered quickly. "But you have told me so much about her I almost feel like I do."

A _starry_-_eyed_Alice giggled and hugged James' arm tightly.

"You still have to meet Edward. I can't wait for you to meet him too. You'll be best friends from the get go. I just know it." Alice gushed as she continued to gaze at James lovingly, completely oblivious of Bella's discomfort and James' too eager looks towards her friend. Her infatuation with the boy was blinding her usual perceptiveness.

"Oh," Alice suddenly jumped, releasing James from her embrace. She extracted a small cell phone out of her purse and stared at the screen for a few seconds. She immediately looked dejected and sighed.

"It's my dad. I have to take this call. Would you mind keeping Bella company while I talk to him?" She asked James in a breathy voice. She even batted her eyelashes for good measure.

Bella felt bile rising to her throat at the thought of being left alone with James. Even if only for a few seconds. Even in a public space such as the diner. She tried to think of any plausible excuse to explain a sudden departure, but sadly her brain was scared stiff and couldn't react fast enough. Alice was gone before she could find an exit.

James took Alice's seat in the booth, right next to Bella.

Deprived an escape route, Bella sat staring fixedly at her uneaten burger. She gazed at her plate and the ketchup happy faces she had been drawing just minutes before James' arrival. She had been thinking of her meadow, Edward, their immediate future. She had been happy, in spite of her concerns about Carlisle and Esme's talk. Now, she felt as if a cloud had entered the clear skies of her life, keeping the much needed sunrays of hope away.

She couldn't believe Alice could feel happiness around James. She had only just met him and all she wanted was to run away as far away as possible.

"How is Forks treating you Isabella? I heard from Alice that you're new in town. I am too." James interjected, breaking the much welcomed silence Bella had been praying would never end.

"Um…" Bella hesitated. She didn't want to encourage a conversation, not even small talk. However, she also didn't want to be cold towards Alice's would-be boyfriend. If their relationship developed she would be seeing a lot more of him – as undesirable as that thought was for her.

"Cat got your tongue?" James teased

Bella was not amused in the slightest by his comment. Something about James repulsed her and no amount of niceness or jokes on his part was going to erase those feelings from her heart.

She glared at him momentarily before answering, "No, it didn't. I was just thinking of a proper answer. Honestly, Forks isn't much different from where I used to live. Smaller, rainier, greener perhaps, but people are just the same. Some you trust and like, some you find repellent and annoying. It's just a city and I've liked everyone I've known so far." She felt a need to add 'up until now' but refrained. She had been brusque enough as it was.

"You dislike my company," James declared simply.

Bella was left speechless by James' statement. He was very observant, and she couldn't hide her reactions to the feeling in the pit of her stomach that told her he was bad news.

"I'm sorry if my answer offended you, or gave you that impression. It wasn't my intention, but I barely know you and I had a bad day yesterday. So please excuse my lack of interest in making small talk," Bella said, trying to use the nicest tone of voice that she could manage. She grabbed a couple of bills from her wallet and placed them on the counter.

"Thanks," she said to her waitress, who had been hovering around a table near her, and rose from her seat. She turned towards James and forced a smile. She didn't like him, but Alice did, she had to at least make an effort to be courteous.

"Bye James, a pleasure to meet you," she lied.

Before James had any time to react she headed for the door as fast as she could without looking like she was running away. She was going to call Edward and let him know she was heading home. He was half an hour late and that could only mean one thing: the conversation between Carlisle and Esme had turned into a fight and he couldn't catch a ride with his dad.

She was standing outside the diner, about to dial Edward's number, when she felt a hand grabbing her arm from behind. She jumped, frightened by the sudden touch, and turned to see whose hand was wrapped around her elbow. A mix of repulsion, anger and a strong urge to flee filled her the moment she realized that the hand belonged to James.

"What are you doing? Let go!" she demanded heatedly while trying to free her arm from James' grip.

"Calling your little boyfriend?" James asked mockingly, but Bella wasn't fooled by his tone. She could see the threat hidden within the depths of his icy eyes.

"None of your business! Now let go of me before I scream!" she answered, trying with all her might to hide how frightened he made her feel. She was quaking inside but she needed to keep it hidden. James couldn't know she found him intimidating.

Mercifully, James let go immediately. However, he didn't leave her alone or stop giving her that weird wintry look that reminded Bella of her worst nightmares.

Bella walked towards the parking lot. She reasoned that given her circumstances maybe it was best to call her dad before she called Edward. She needed to escape from James as fast as she could. Deep down, she knew he couldn't really do anything to her in a public place. But no matter how many times she told herself that, she couldn't make the fear pulsating through her veins stop.

She stopped near the parking lot entry and dialed her dad's cell. Fortunately, he picked up on the first ring and assured her he would be there in a few minutes. Bella sighed in relief knowing her dad was on his way.

Her relief was short-lived.

She felt a presence near her, a dark presence. She turned and found James standing right behind her, giving her that creepy look he had been since the moment he walked into the diner. She felt her patience running thin. No matter how scared he made her, she wasn't about to let him get under her skin like he was trying to.

"Why are you following me?" she snapped at him. "Don't you have a date with Alice? Go wait for her and leave me alone."

He walked in her direction and Bella took a couple of steps back until she found her back against the wall that divided the parking lot from the street. James stopped really close to her, too close for comfort, and said in a low menacing voice, "What if I don't want to?"

A flame of anger ignited inside Bella's heart. How could he make a pass on her when he was there with Alice?

No matter how scared she felt around James there was also a part inside her that wanted to knee him in the groin and wipe that smug expression from his face. That was the part she showed to James.

"Then I'll kick you where it hurts the most and you try to explain to Alice why you're talking like a girl," Bella warned in what she hoped was a menacing tone.

"Aren't you a little spitfire? I like that," James replied, reaching out with his hand to touch Bella's face.

She slapped his hand away and glared at him. No one touched her if she didn't want to be touched. She may not have control over her dream life, she may not have control about many aspects of her life, but she would have control over the basics at least. She wouldn't let this _boy_ scare her into submitting to his petty mind games.

James responded to Bella's glare and defiant attitude with an equally powerful glare of his own. He didn't like to be thwarted and he certainly didn't like to be rejected.

Bella was about to knee him as promised when they both turned in reaction to Alice's voice.

"Bella! James!" Alice yelled at them from the diner entryway. She ran towards them and Bella could see tears running down her face. She felt distraught.

_Oh no! Was Alice misinterpreting the closeness between James and me? Would she tell Edward? Would he believe Alice over me?_

Bella's throat felt suddenly very dry.

"What is it Alice?" James asked, trying to look innocent. He backed up quickly putting as much distance as possible between him and Bella.

"My Grandma…" Alice wailed.

Bella's heart beat furiously inside her chest, almost as if it wanted to escape from inside her. _What could have gone wrong? Was Edward alright?_

"What happened to Esme?" Bella asked in a small voice. She was so afraid of the answer she might get.

"She and my grandpa had a fight. I don't know really. She had some sort of fainting fit… I don't know…. A heart attack… My dad wasn't very clear but he'll be here to pick me up in a couple of minutes," Alice replied in a rush.

"Oh my… I'm so sorry Alice. My dad will be here in a couple of minutes too. Can we follow you to the hospital? Please?" Bella pleaded. She had a knot at the pit of her stomach. It was getting heavier and heavier the longer she was away from Edward. She needed to make sure he was alright.

"Of course…" Alice sniffled as James grabbed her, encircling her in his arms. Bella felt sick at that display. She would have a serious talk with Alice about James as soon as she could. A sweet girl like Alice had no place with a creep like James.

Just in that moment a very tall, russet-skinned man parked his pick-up right in front of the teens.

"Dad!" Alice exclaimed in between sobs running towards the tall man.

"Alice," the man almost whispered as he hugged his daughter tightly. Bella could see the love this man felt for his daughter reflected in his eyes and it warmed her heart. Alice had a loving family, and great parents. If nothing else she was sure they would protect her from James at all costs. This soothed her fears to some degree, but not completely.

"Dad what happened? Why is grandma in the hospital?" Alice asked.

"It seems as though she had a rise in her blood pressure. They are monitoring her and taking some samples for tests. I think she had an argument with your grandpa. You know how sensitive she can get at times. Don't worry sweetie, she'll be fine," Alice's father reassured in a soft calm tone. But Bella could see the worry edged in his expression and wasn't convinced that Esme was truly alright.

"Dad, can we take Bella to the hospital with us?" Alice inquired pointing towards her friend. "Her dad is on his way, but she could text him and tell him where we are."

Alice's father's eyes found Bella and he blinked several times, before talking again. He seemed somewhat stunned.

"Bella Swan?" he asked in a hollow voice. When Bella looked at him — really looked at him — she felt a shudder run down her spine. She felt an intense feeling of recognition, almost as strong as the one she felt when she met Edward.

"Yes…" she whispered. Something inside her told her that she could trust this man, like she trusted in her own father. Unlike when she first saw James, she didn't feel threatened by him. She felt protected in his presence. She smiled tentatively at him and he responded with a brilliant smile — the kind you give to friends you haven't seen in a long time.

"Edward asked me to tell you he wanted to see you, but for obvious reasons he couldn't come. Would you like a ride with us to the hospital? We can call your dad on the way there," he said, the smile never faltering from his lips.

"Yes, thank you," Bella replied her voice and smile no longer tentative.

"I'm so sorry for ruining our day James. I hope you understand," Alice addressed the almost forgotten boy standing behind Bella.

James cleared his throat before replying, "Yes, yes, of course… I'll call you to reschedule. Please let me know if you need anything."

Alice smiled warmly before nodding. She already felt so at ease around James and he just seemed nicer and nicer the more she got to know him.

Her father, however, all but glowered at the unknown boy. Jacob Cullen wasn't a big fan of allowing Alice to date so young, but it was more than that. He felt a dark vibe coming from the boy and he didn't trust him one bit.

"Sir…" James said in acknowledgment. He had lost the arrogance he had shown Bella, the minute Jacob arrived. He was acting just as respectful as he had acted around Alice. He even looked a little bit afraid. "I hope your mother feels better soon. I have to go… um… goodbye."

Without any further words James turned on his heels and left, much to Bella's relief.

"Okay, climb up, we need to get going," Alice's father said.

Bella breathed deeply before climbing into the back seat of the truck. She was afraid for Edward and couldn't wait to see him, but she also feared that he might blame her somehow for his mother's state. She hoped with all her might that wasn't the case.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Edward had been pacing the waiting room for more than an hour. His hair was in a complete state of disarray due to the way he kept raking his fingers through it. He had never been so scared or angry before in his life. Scared for his mother, angry for the lack of control he had over his life.

His whole life had been ruled by nightmares, and just when they seemed a thing of the past they came back. Not only had they come back but there was a whole story, a mystery behind them. A mystery that revolved around a brother he never knew he had and his girlfriend. A girl who very unexpectedly turned out to be related to Bella, the girl he wanted to call his — the only girl he had ever wanted to call his.

It just looked as if his life had been decided long before he was even born. Like he had no say in it, like he was just a passenger in this ride and could do nothing but watch the scenery. He didn't like that feeling one little bit.

They had gotten home and everything was quiet — too quiet.

As Edward had been climbing the stairs to take a shower and change he had heard it, his mother's voice — her irate voice.

"Where have you been Edward?" she fumed from the top of the stairs.

"Not now, Mom," Edward had groaned in annoyance. He was tired of fighting with her and didn't even see the point anymore. He would let his father handle things, just like he had promised he would. If there was someone capable of making his mother see reason, that person was his father.

"Not now? Not now! Is that all you have to say after I've spent a whole morning looking for you? After I walked into your room to find your bed made as if no one even slept on it! Where did you sleep?"

His mother's voice was so loud he was sure people could hear her all the way to Port Angeles.

He was about to respond when his father's voice interrupted him.

"In case you don't remember I came home early this morning to find you passed out drunk in bed. You asked me to check on Edward and I did. After he made his bed, we went out to have breakfast. I didn't think you would mind."

Edward was thankful for his father's calm and for his ability to come up with a reasonable explanation.

Esme had paled at her husbands words and Edward had felt a frisson of hope. He knew his mother respected his father, and would hear his argument in favor of allowing their son to be around Bella. He hoped his father could convince her, or at least twist her arm to accept.

"I… I'm sorry…" she had apologized before going to her room.

"Edward, go to your room," his father had said in a soft but commanding voice.

He had obeyed and locked himself in his bedroom. He had hoped his father would sway his mother's opinion. He had been in high spirits, but it all came crashing down as the yelling began.

He had never heard his father raise his voice, not once, but his mother had been loud enough for them both.

He had heard his mother curse Marie, the Dwyers, the Swans, even Bella. He heard her try to make her point again — this time to his dad — of just how wrong Bella was for him, of how he was too young to know what was good for him.

He decided to finally take his shower after a while, hoping his mother would be calmer by the time he finished. He had been mistaken. It only seemed to get worse with time.

He even heard her threaten to divorce his father and take him away from him, from Forks, from Bella. His heart had accelerated its rhythm in panic. His mother's words causing a lump to form in his throat.

Then he had heard silence, and after that, yelling again, but this time it came from his father.

He had panicked and ran towards his parents' bedroom. The scenario he found could only be part of a bad dream: his father bent over his mother's body, and she lying in bed, obviously unconscious and obviously unwell.

"Call an ambulance," his father had said in a broken voice that betrayed his true state of mind. He had been scared.

Edward had run desperately downstairs, almost tripping twice along the way, and called 911.

It had all happened in a blur. The ambulance came, took his mother and father away. He had to call Jacob to give him the news and ask for a ride to the hospital, since only one person could go with his mom. They had gotten to the emergency room, only to be asked to sit in the waiting room. After a while his brother had started to call people, trying to keep his mind occupied, Edward presumed. He had called Alice too and this had reminded Edward of a very important date he was missing. He had asked Jacob to pass along a message to Bella, who would be in the same diner as Alice. He had asked is brother to explain his no-show, and if possible bring Bella with him to the hospital.

Jacob had given him a dubious look, probably wondering why Edward of all people was thinking of a girl in a moment like this. Luckily, his brother wasn't one to meddle and didn't ask any questions before agreeing to do the favor. When Edward revealed the name of the girl, he had acted a bit weird. Edward had presumed he recognized the last name and linked Bella to Renee, and consequently Marie. For a moment he feared Jacob would give him a speech similar to the one his mother had been trying to pitch, but he didn't. Jacob just turned pensive, and left without further questioning. Edward was very thankful for small mercies.

Since then, he had paced the cold waiting room alone, waiting for any news on his mother. The only thing his father had told Jacob briefly was that she had had a spike of blood pressure, and that they needed more analyses to asses her condition.

"Hi…" he suddenly heard a sweet voice whisper, a sweet voice he had been longing to hear all afternoon.

"Bella," he breathed, turning to face her and gathering her in his arms. Just the warmth of her body was enough to soothe the blazing fear that had been consuming his soul ever since his mother was admitted.

Bella held herself tightly to him, all the dread she had experienced with James back in the diner completely forgotten.

"I needed you so much," Edward whispered directly into her ear. She could hear the pain and fear he was feeling in his voice and it cracked her heart to know that there was nothing more she could do than be there for him. Little did she know, Edward could not have wished for anything else.

"I did too," she said placing a soft kiss on his jaw, letting him know with her actions how much he was loved.

Someone coughed and the little bubble in which they had been living burst, bringing them back to reality.

"Sorry," Edward smiled apologetically at his brother letting Bella go but keeping his fingers entwined with hers.

"Don't worry. I still remember what it was being your age. I understand," Jacob smiled sympathetically. He truly did remember his days back when he was fifteen and he would chase Tanya everywhere. Back then he hadn't even been a blip on her radar, but his persistence had paid off and now she was his wife.

"Any news?" Alice asked warily. She almost feared the answer she would be given, but she needed to know if her grandma would be alright. She was such a young, healthy woman. She had to be alright.

"Nothing yet, I think they are still running tests."

"What happened?" Bella asked timidly. She didn't want to be nosy, but she had been dying to know how Edward's parents talk went all afternoon. It clearly ended in disaster, but she still needed the details.

"I don't know for certain, but from what I heard through the screaming my mom wouldn't budge. She's very stubborn when she wants to be and she even threatened my father with divorce if he didn't change his mind and decide to support her decision."

Alice gasped when she heard Edward's voice. The whole idea of her grandma ever leaving his grandpa seemed ridiculous to her.

"Why would grandma say that? What's going on Edward?"

Edward and Bella shared a brief look, each asking the other if it was okay to share what had transpired since they last saw Alice. It seemed inevitable that after today everyone would find out about Anthony and Marie and how they were still affecting Bella and Edward's lives. It only seemed fair to share what they knew with Alice.

"Is a long story," Edward said, "and we only know parts of it. I'm sure Jacob can fill in some blanks though."

Jacob nodded curtly and answered, "I'll tell you as much as I can. Tell us what happened this morning."

Edward signaled for everyone to take a seat and started his story about the discoveries they had made in the last couple of days.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"So let me get this straight, grandma hates Bella because her aunt killed Anthony?" Alice inquired.

Edward nodded.

"And Anthony was your biological brother, who they never told you even existed?"

Edward nodded again.

"And Bella also never knew about her aunt Marie or what she had done?"

Bella nodded this time.

"And they both died the same day Edward was born?" Alice continued her line of questioning this time addressing her dad.

"That's right…" he confirmed.

"Actually," Bella interjected, "They both died the day Edward and I were born."

"What?" Jacob asked disconcerted by Bella's words.

"I was also born June 20th. My mother's due day as far as I know was around June 10th. I was actually a little late."

"This is too weird…" Alice said in an awed voice.

"I have to agree with Alice, this is getting stranger by the minute. However, I must let you know I do not agree with my mother. Her actions were exaggerated and ridiculous. I think Dad and I are to blame for that. After Anthony died we were overprotective of her. We did everything in our power to make her happy. We even allowed her to stop therapy way before she had truly gotten over the trauma. I think we should have encouraged her to heal not indulge in her denial. She spent the last fifteen years blaming the Dwyer family when no one was to blame for this tragedy.

"To this day I still believe there's something hidden behind the events of that night. I know for a fact that Anthony wouldn't have abandoned Marie after they got back together. I'm also one-hundred percent sure she didn't return to her old vices. At the time of her death, she was even working as a counselor in an organization that cared for kids that had gone through addictions like she had. Moreover, even if I'm mistaken and she did go back to drugs, I see her killing herself before killing Anthony. She adored him. She wouldn't hurt a hair on his head."

"She hurt him plenty if what Bella's mom said to her is true," Alice cut in.

"They both hurt each other," Jacob replied in a stern tone. "What you fail to see due to your inexperience is that in a relationship there's not a single guilty party. Both ends are to blame for the success or the fail of it. Anthony could have forgiven Marie when she slept that first time with Demetri. If he did she would have stayed away from the drugs, the wild partying, and the alcohol to which Demetri introduced her to later on."

Alice was eager to pipe in to defend her previously unknown uncle's honor, but Jacob held is hand halting her mid sentence.

"Let me finish. I'm not trying to defend Marie, what she did that night was incredibly stupid. She should have stayed and finished that fight there. She should have asked Anthony to clarify the misunderstanding they had. But I knew her well, she was one of my closest friends and I know she was too immature and too insecure to do that. Her mother was the most vicious and cold woman I'd ever met. She filled Marie's head with hate and hurt that she ended up directing towards herself. It doesn't surprise me that at the first bump in the road she would go and do something completely self-destructive. I'm just saying that there's more to their story than you could ever comprehend.

Jacob's words peaked Bella's curiosity about the break-up. She had been wondering what sort of fight had led Marie straight into this Demetri's arms. So she gathered her thoughts and asked the question that had been nagging at her since she first found Marie's diary, "Why did they fight that night?"

Her question had a great effect on Jacob; he grew completely still and turned to look at Edward and Bella, then Alice. He was clearly deciding what he should say and what he should keep to himself.

"Please," Bella pleaded. "I need to know. If they are going to continue to affect our lives we need to know as much as we can."

Jacob felt a pang in his heart. Ever since he met Bella at the diner her eyes reminded him of Marie's. She had been his only friend apart from Anthony and she had been there for him when he had suffered Tanya's many rejections. He couldn't deny the truth to her niece, but he couldn't reveal it to his daughter. Alice had an idea of her mother in her mind that he wasn't ready to shatter.

"Okay I will tell you, but only you two. Let's go to the reception area."

Alice was about to protest but Jacob stopped her on her tracks.

"This doesn't concern you Alice, it's something private that happened between two people that aren't here to defend themselves anymore. So please stay here and come looking for us if your grandpa has any news."

Alice sighed annoyed but decided that she could weasel the secret out of Bella or Edward after things calmed down, so she conceded.

"Fine!" She said sitting back on her chair and crossing her arms in front of her chest like a sulking three year old. Jacob almost expected her to puff out her cheeks like she used to do when she was little and didn't get her way. He adored his daughter but she could be one stubborn little thing when she wanted. _Just like her mother_, Jacob thought sadly.

Once they were out of Alice's earshot Jacob directed his eyes to the teens who continued to hold hands, never letting go of each other.

"Okay, I will tell you what they fought about, but you have to promise you will never tell this to Alice"

"But wh…" Edward started but was cut short by his brother's severe expression.

"Okay, I promise," he sighed reluctantly. He had never hidden anything from Alice before and he wasn't sure why he had to do start doing that now.

"I promise," Bella agreed, happy that Jacob was going to reveal at least one of the mysteries to them.

"Okay," Jacob said in a weary voice, closing his eyes briefly as if trying to gather his strength. "When we were young, we moved to Forks from New York, as you already know."

Edward and Bella both nodded encouraging Jacob to continue with their silence.

"I was originally from Forks. As you know Edward, my biological father still lives in the reservation where I was born."

This time only Edward nodded.

"My mom, and by that I mean Esme, my adoptive mother, not my biological one. Well, Esme wanted me to reconnect with my roots and she also wanted to live in a small town like she did when she was a kid. When we moved here I quickly made friends with Marie. I met her at La Push beach one of the few times I visited Billy, my biological father. She was all by herself, collecting rocks from the sand and putting them in a bag. I must confess I initially had a crush on her."

Jacob smiled at the memory of a time not so long ago when he had seen what he had thought was an angel; a chestnut-haired, chocolate-eyed angel collecting rocks and sea shells. He had been feeling crushed by his father's indifference towards him and had struck up a conversation with this sweet girl. Before he knew it they had become friends.

"Well long story short, when I met Tanya and Anthony met Marie our relationship was officially labeled as friendship. However, Tanya wasn't as happy with my attentions as Marie was with Anthony's. In fact, she rejected my advances until around the time we turned eighteen."

"Wow, I knew you were a persistent man, but not that persistent," Edward interrupted Jacob's tale.

Jacob smiled warmly and continued, "When you know she's the one you just can't give up. Anyways, Tanya had a serious crush on Anthony, but of course Anthony only saw her as a friend. Anthony was also good friends with another local girl. She moved out long ago from Forks so you don't know her Edward, but she was very beautiful and very kind. This of course never sit well with someone as insecure as Marie, but Anthony was too good and too naïve to see through Tanya's plans."

"What do you mean?" Edward asked perplexed. He had never known Tanya to be conniving or mean-spirited.

"I mean that back then Tanya was a kid, irresponsible, foolish, made lots of mistakes. She had self-esteem issues of her own and used to be a bit wild."

Edward understood at that moment why Jacob had asked Alice to stay behind.

"After a while Tanya's pursuit of Anthony became more obvious. When Anthony wasn't looking she would say things to Marie, hurtful things that made her doubt herself and Anthony's love for her even more than she already did. She never told Anthony and she didn't even tell me until after their separation. She just took it all in.

"One night there was a party at Tanya's place. Neither Anthony nor Marie, nor Anthony's best friend Rosalie wanted to go. But I insisted and insisted because I wanted to. Tanya's parents were out of town and I wanted to go check-up on her. In the end Anthony relented and Rosalie and Marie followed.

"I don't know all the details of what they did that night, all I know is that Marie an Anthony got separated at some point. I was in the living room watching Tanya from afar, checking she wasn't doing anything too dangerous since she was so drunk. After a while Anthony found Tanya and asked her if she had seen Rosalie. He wanted to leave and had promised to take Rosalie and Marie safely home. Marie walked in behind Anthony at that moment, so Anthony didn't see her, but Tanya did. Before he could move or react Tanya grabbed his face between her hands tightly and kissed him — hard."

Edward gaped at Jacob's confession. _Tanya had practically ruined Marie's life in a selfish and childish act? _

Bella begun to understand why Tanya was so afraid of her, she probably saw her aunt in her and felt guilty. Or maybe Tanya felt haunted by her past wrongdoings.

Jacob carried on with his story, "Marie of course left before Anthony could explain. The rest I know from hearsay and from talks I had with Marie after Anthony moved back to New York. Apparently, Marie went home and Demetri was there. He was almost always there since his father sold drugs in partnership with Marie's father. Also, he had wanted Marie for a long time, so he took advantage of her vulnerability and the fact that she was drunk. Anthony went after Marie and…"

Bella waited patiently for Jacob to continue. This conversation was finally shedding some light into the mystery that was Anthony and Marie. Maybe she could finally figure out what they wanted from Edward and her with this information along with Marie's diary.

Jacob sighed heavily and said, "He caught them in the act and that broke my brother. He came home soaking wet and sobbing that night. I'd never seen him cry before, but that night he was a shell of the boy who left that party after his angry girlfriend. The next day as you know he moved out as far away as he could. For a long time I blamed Marie, and Tanya too, for the loss of my best friend and my only brother. But when Marie sank into depression I offered her my friendship again. Even though I didn't agree with the new company she kept after Anthony left. I tried to be there for her, because I knew that without Anthony and without Renee she didn't have anybody."

Bella felt tears soaking her face. She couldn't begin to imagine what she would feel if she saw Edward kissing another girl, let alone walking in on them doing _that_.

Edward felt drained and angry at the world, angry at Marie, angry at Tanya, angry at the brother he would never meet. They all had made mistakes and he was paying for them. His mother, Bella, Bella's parents, they all continued to pay for _their_ mistakes.

Before anyone could mull over Jacob's words too much, Alice came looking for them.

"Grandpa wants you," a pale-faced Alice stated.

They all felt anxiety fill their hearts at the prospect of what news awaited them.

* * *

**A/N** Howdy! No, I didn't drop off the face of the Earth...I just had RL-drama-induced Writer's block...Don't worry I'm over it... me thinks...

I would like to thank **Rhian0000 **not only for Betaing this for me, but just because I flove her... she's one of the best friends I've made in this fandom, and she has earned not only my gratitude but my respect and friendship as well...

Also I would like to thank **lemonmartinis **, she pre-read this faster than warp speed... Seriously, it was like I said 'engage' and woah I had my chapter back from her... Thank you for all the help guys...

So to overcome my writer's block I wrote A&M's break-up... and I will be posting that it on the main story - meaning here - so that you don't have to put another story on alert...I may need to write more outtakes to put myself in the characters shoes, and I thought WTH some peeps may be interested in them, so why keep them to myself?

So if you get another alert during this week that's the outtake...As you know from this chappie, Marie does CHEAT...if you're like me, and that bothers you, you can skip the outtake. You won't be missing anything that wasn't said in this chapter...

Okay thanks to those who stuck with me during my writer's block...to those who reviewed, recommended, faved, or put this story on alert...

(Hugs)

**Ange**

**PS.** I wrote a O/S for a contest, it's smutty so if you are in the mood for that you can find it posted on my profile as well.


	12. Outtake 1

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**This plotline, however, is ****© Ange de L'aube****. I really don't see the point in stealing something I'm already providing for free, so please refrain from plagiarizing this story. Thank you. **

**WARNING: This Chapter is very un-fluffy. **

**I must issue a tissue warning if you're sensitive, a cheating warning, and an 'I want to slap the characters until they come to their senses' warning.**

**Continue reading at your own risk.**

**I would like to thank ****babsiebaby**. She was kind enough to Beta this for me to give me peace of mind, before I posted it. Thank you Babs... Mwah!

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* * *

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**Outtake 1: ****Ashes, ashes, we all fall down**

**"These violent delights have violent ends ****and in their triumph die, like fire and powder, which, as they kiss, consume. (Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene VI )" **

_William Shakespeare (Romeo and Juliet)_

"You're drunk"

"I'm not!"

"Okay tipsy but you had too much to drink already," Anthony said grabbing his girlfriend by the waist. She didn't want to go to Tanya's party, but once they got there she had started to drink, and drink. She had never had a drink before in her life. Anthony was worried and ashamed he had allowed her to drink like that.

"Come on! Let's go find Rosalie so we can go home," Anthony suggested. He was tired, and this party had become too wild for his taste a long time ago.

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say. The moment he mentioned Rosalie, Marie disentangled his arms from her waist and glared at him with eyes full of fury.

"What?" Anthony asked confused, he couldn't understand why she hated Rosalie or Tanya for that matter. They were his best friends and although he didn't agree with some of the things Tanya did — like for example the party she was throwing at her house while her parents were away — he had nothing to say about Rosalie's behavior. She was a great friend and really supportive of his relationship with Marie.

"Nothing, just that as usual whenever you're with me you have to bring Rosalie or Tanya along. We can never be alone," Marie said in a seething tone.

Anthony frowned not fully comprehending what she was hinting by this. They spent a lot of time together — alone. Furthermore, Marie had never implied she disliked Rosalie. She had stated her dislike for Tanya loud and clear in several occasions, but she had never had anything bad to say about Rosalie. This sudden outburst didn't make sense to Anthony so he chalked it up to her state of drunkenness.

"Mon amour, really, you know that isn't true," he pleaded trying to caress Marie's cheeks.

Marie flinched from the contact and Anthony could feel a heavy knot forming in his throat as a result of Marie's reaction. She had never acted this way.

"Really?" She fumed. "Every time we go to a party, or the movies, everywhere, those two skanks have to follow. Are you sleeping with one of them or with both? Is that why you keep them around? Because we are your little harem?"

Marie knew that her words were extremely hurtful, but something had been boiling inside her all afternoon. Ever since Anthony had proposed going to the party. The moment he suggested they go, she had heard Demitri's words inside her head.

"_He's cheating on you with one of them. I would bet it's with Rosalie since she's his closest friend, but I wouldn't discount Tanya. She's a whore as it is. I'm sure she has offered several times, and since you don't put out. Men can only wait for so long if there are perfectly available women within reach." _

She usually didn't listen to whatever Demitri had to say. She never liked the boy, and only tolerated him because he was the son of her father's best friend. She didn't even know why she had told him about her doubts about Anthony and the relationship he had with Rosalie and Tanya.

Her insecurity had started with a passing comment her mom had made, after Anthony visited with Rosalie. She had said boys were not able of being _just_ friends with girls. And it had festered, and festered, to the point that all she had in mind the whole afternoon was that nagging idea. Then she had to go and open up to Demitri, only making the situation worse and her doubts bigger.

She saw hurt and disbelief coloring Anthony's features when her words registered. It broke her heart to see any type of pain in Anthony's expression. She knew deep down that there was a high possibility that she was wrong. Scratch that, she knew she was wrong. She knew she was allowing her mother's spiteful comments to get to her. She knew that Demitri had wanted into her pants for a long time, but she had said the words, and couldn't take them back now.

"Anthony…" she whispered tentatively trying to reach out and grab her love's hand in hers. She wanted to express her regret, but didn't know how.

"No…" Anthony said pulling away. "I can't believe that's what you think of me! What's gotten into you?"

She could hear Anthony's voice breaking. She knew that her words had cut deep, but she was drunk enough to slower her senses. She couldn't formulate a proper apology.

"I'm sorry I..." she started but was immediately interrupted by Anthony's angry voice.

"Save it. I'll go find Rosalie and you wait for me here. You're obviously too drunk and lost your filter. We will talk about this when you have some caffeine in your system."

And with those words he left her standing in the hallway. She was choking in regret. It was not how she had envisioned this night to go, but as usual she had sabotaged herself.

She always sabotaged herself.

She groaned and sunk to the floor, hiding her face between her legs. She was starting to feel dizzy and sort of tired. After a few seconds, she banged her head against the wall. Wishing to numb the pain she felt inside her soul with a physical one.

"I never do anything right, not one little thing right… never… never…" she repeated as a mantra, until tears pooled in her eyes, taking her focus out of her pain, and placing it on the emptiness she felt.

So barren.

She hastily wiped her tears, and slowly and clumsily rose from the floor. She had to find Anthony. She had to fix things. He was the only good thing she had in her life. If she lost him she would lose everything. She might as well die.

Marie stumbled against the mass of bodies dancing to the beat of Tanya's stereo. The air was smoky, heavy, hot. She wanted to find Anthony as soon as possible, the choking feeling at the pit of her stomach increasing in intensity.

An ominous air surrounded the whole day. She had felt as if this was a turning point in her life from the moment she woke up, but now she felt the feeling growing in strength, smothering her.

She finally saw Anthony's back turned to her. He was talking to Tanya. They seemed to be having an argument but she couldn't hear what they were saying through the deafening blast of the speakers.

Suddenly, her whole world turned on its axis, and crumbled. Tanya grabbed Anthony's face and kissed him passionately.

She had always heard that a broken heart was one of the worse feelings one could ever encounter. What everyone failed to tell her was that it didn't feel as if her heart was broken. It felt as if every single part that made her who she was, shattered. She was not heart-broken, she was wholly-broken.

Her only instinct was to run. Run away from the betrayal, run away from her stomped and crushed soul.

And so she ran, as far away as she could.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"What the hell was that for?" Anthony hissed. One minute he was talking with Tanya about his fight with Marie, trying to defend his girlfriend's actions — which according to Tanya were nothing but one of her usual tantrums — and the next Tanya was trying to shove her tongue down his throat.

"What? You didn't like it?" Tanya replied with a drunken slur. She was too drunk to be of any use or even know what she was doing. She didn't know where Rosalie was, and was acting beyond ridiculous.

_What is__ it about drunken people tonight?_ Anthony wondered and sighed.

"Okay Tanya, whatever... Make sure you drink a cup of coffee. I need to find Rosalie and get the hell out of here."

He walked towards the room, doing his best to dodge the boisterous teens that were moving around in the makeshift dance floor. He saw his brother watching from a hidden corner, and groaned. He was sure Jacob had seen the kiss between Tanya and him. But given his brother's feelings towards Tanya, and his friendship with Marie, he would probably assume the worst. When Jacob walked in his direction with an anguished look on his face he knew he was right.

"Jacob is not what it looks…" Anthony started but was interrupted by Jacob before he could finish his explanation.

"I know. I saw everything. I know she kissed you not the other way around. I saw you pushing her away. That's not the problem Anthony. Marie saw you too, but she didn't see the end. She ran. You must go after her at once before she does something stupid."

Jacob's words made Anthony's heart palpitate so fast he could almost hear its heartbeats. They had just had a fight about it. She had told him, not ten minutes before that she believed he had something with Tanya or Rosalie, or both. Only to walk at the precise moment Tanya kissed him. She was drunk and probably heartbroken. He had to find her. He had to fix this.

"Where did she go? Did you see in which direction she ran?" Anthony asked desperately. He needed to find Marie before it was too late, before she did something stupid.

"I'm not sure where she went, but I saw she caught a ride with Angela Weber. Remember? That nice girl from senior year?" Jacob answered in a rush.

Anthony felt some of the panic dissipate. At least he knew she was with someone friendly, not hitchhiking at the side of the road. Still, he needed to find her sooner rather than later.

"Maybe she went to her house?" Jacob suggested. "I don't see her going anywhere else this late at night."

Anthony nodded, and grabbed his brother's shoulders. "Please look for Rosalie and see her safely home. I need to talk with Marie before she blows this out of proportion."

"Of course," Jacob replied patting his brother on the back. "Go find your girl."

Anthony ran through the foyer, frantically searching his pockets for the keys to his car.

He opened the door and stuck the key in the ignition. Much to his disappointment the car wouldn't start.

"Damnit! Start you piece of crap!" He yelled turning the key again and again. However, the dying sound of his engine indicated clearly it wouldn't start without help. His battery was dead.

"Crap!" he said beating his hands against the steering wheel. He couldn't waste his time here. If he walked he could get to Marie's house in half an hour, forty minutes tops. If he tried to find someone with jumper cables, or call AA, it could take more than an hour. So, his decision was made. He climbed down and started to walk as fast as he could, hoping with all his heart he wasn't too late.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"Are you sure you'll be fine?" Angela asked to the sobbing girl. She had never even spoken to Marie before this night. She had seen her running out of the party just as she was about to leave and offered to give her a ride home. She didn't know why she was crying, but she wasn't one to pry.

"Yes," she replied in a hollow voice.

Angela parked her car in front of Marie's house, and insisted. "Are you absolutely sure? You can come home with me if your parents aren't home. I don't think you should be alone in your condition."

Marie opened her door and offered a watery smile to Angela.

"Thank you," she whispered. "I'll be fine."

Angela felt bad about letting her go, but she couldn't help someone if said someone didn't want help. So she nodded and drove away once Marie was inside her house.

As soon as Marie closed her door she sunk to the floor and beat it with her hands.

_You're a failure. You're ugly. No one will ever love you. _Thoughts like those kept repeating in her head like a broken record while she continued to beat her hands against the floor. A silent scream escaped her throat. She didn't have the strength to make an actual sound. She didn't have the strength to move, so she curled in the floor and sobbed quietly until she felt a pair of arms wrapping themselves around her form, and lifting her from the floor.

"What are you doing?" She asked in a low raspy voice. She knew it was Demitri since he was the only one at her place. Her parents and Demitri's were having dinner in Port Angeles and wouldn't return until later.

"I'm taking you to your bed, since you couldn't make it there by yourself. The floor is too cold for you to sleep in it," he replied and continued his ascent to her room.

She let him carry her. She didn't feel like struggling.

Once in her room he placed her on the bed, and walked towards the door. She heard the door close and assumed he left, but moments later she felt her bed sink and realized he was still there.

"What happened?" he asked after a few moments of silence.

"You were right," Marie answered simply, pressing her face against the pillow.

Demitri moved her hair away from her face, and Marie recoiled from his touch. It wasn't the warm touch she craved.

"Don't flinch. I'm just trying to help. Maybe you'll feel better if you talk about it."

"I doubt it," Marie responded hiding her face further against her pillow.

"You won't know if you don't try," Demitri persisted.

Marie sighed heavily and sat up in bed, hoping that if she told him what happened he would leave her alone.

"You were right," she repeated in a soft voice looking towards her window. "Anthony…" a small sob escaped her when she pronounced his name. "He doesn't love me. He's cheating on me with Tanya."

"I told you so," Demitri said moving his finger under Marie's chin and turning her face towards him. "He doesn't know what he's missing."

Marie's eyes widened at his words, but she didn't comment on them. She was feeling so unloved, so alone. She was seeing Demitri in a new light. He didn't seem creepy or scary anymore. He almost seemed nice.

"You're a beautiful girl Marie, and if he doesn't see that then he doesn't deserve you."

Marie sniffled loudly in response to his words and hugged him tightly. That had been one the nicest things anyone had ever said to her apart from Jacob, Renee or…Anthony. She hugged him in gratitude. She needed some sort of support. Renee was too far away, and Jacob was Anthony's brother. She needed a friend badly.

Demitri nuzzled her neck, and instead of pushing him away like she always did when he attempted to touch her — she let him.

He kissed behind her ear and whispered, "I do appreciate you. I do love you. Please let me show you."

In the past her immediate answer would had been no. She wouldn't have doubted. She wouldn't have even considered it, but this night all her defenses were down. She felt like a love-starving animal that needed someone to cuddle it, show it that it was important somehow. That it had a home. That it meant something to someone.

Also, the buzz of all the alcohol she had consumed was finally going to her head. There weren't any voices telling her it was wrong, that she had to say no. It was finally silent inside her head.

Thus, when Demitri's hands unbuttoned her jacket, she let him. When Demitri kissed her neck and nibbled on her earlobe, she allowed it. When Demitri pushed her and she was lying with her back against the bed, she remained still and permitted his wandering hands to explore her.

When she felt Demitri's lips traveling from her collarbone, to her neck, tracing a path to her lips, she mouthed 'I love you Anthony', and closed her eyes.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Finally after almost thirty minutes jogging in the rain Anthony made it to the Dwyers' residence. He knocked briefly on their door, and when he got no response he tried the doorknob. It was unlocked.

The lights on the living room were lit, and he could see the TV on, a scene from 'The Godfather' in pause on the screen.

No one seemed to be home, and he wondered if maybe Marie had gone home with Angela. He was about to turn and leave when he heard a male voice groan loudly from upstairs. He didn't know if Marie's parents were home. However, he had heard that Marie's father was less than scrupulous about bringing female company to his own home whenever his wife was away. He feared that maybe that was the case, and the reason behind Marie's absence.

_Perhaps she got home — __upset over the kiss she witnessed between Tanya and me — only to find her father fucking some random woman. Maybe she went to Rosalie's house._ A million possibilities crossed his mind until he heard a sound he had only ever heard before in his meadow. He heard Marie's moan.

His mind froze, but his body continued to move. Without his brain ordering it, his legs started to climb the stairs, as if an invisible force was pulling him in that direction.

He followed the sounds to Marie's bedroom door, and without meaning to, he turned the handle, and opened it slowly.

The image he saw before him would forever stay edged in his memory.

He saw Demitri's naked back. He saw his naked body sitting on Marie's bed. But the image that made him wish for death, the image that made him wish to be blind, was Marie's naked form moving over Demitri. Her arms hugging him to her, her eyes closed, and her mouth open in a silent scream.

He took a step back and tripped on a loose floorboard, causing enough noise to draw attention, but only Marie seemed to react. At a snail's pace, as if time and space had started to move in slow motion she opened her eyes.

Across the open door two pair of eyes met, one pair green, one pair brown, but they both reflected the same feelings: heartbreak, loss, sorrow, emptiness.

At that moment Marie's silent scream turned into a real one. A scream that could not be mistaken with one of pleasure for it resembled the sound only a wounded animal could emit.

Time started to move at a normal pace again, and Anthony ran. He ran away as far as he could, away from this nightmare, away from the broken pieces of his soul.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Rosalie Hale was about to go to bed. She was doing a final check-up, making sure that all her windows and doors were locked. Sometimes it sucked that her mother was a nurse. It was also sad that her father had died long before she got the opportunity to know him, and in nights like this she felt their absence even more. She had spent one too many nights alone at her house when her mother got called for a late night shift, and she hated it.

Nevertheless, she admired her mother deeply and couldn't begrudge her for her career choice.

She was about to go to her room when she heard a knock on the door. It was a weak knock though, and this confused her. It was raining outside. A storm had broken over Forks just when Jacob had dropped her off, and it was only getting worse.

_Maybe is the wind?_ She pondered. However, the knock was continuous and didn't sound like it was being caused by the wind. Gathering all her courage she walked to the window closest to the front door, and pulled the drape a little bit so that she could see what was causing that noise.

She immediately frowned at the sight of the person knocking at her door.

"Anthony?" she whispered, wondering what could bring him to her house so late at night.

_Maybe he came to check that I made it home safely? Why didn't he just call? This doesn't make sense at all?_she thought as she walked towards her door to let Anthony in.

The boy that was standing in her porch was not the boy she had last seen at Tanya's place. The twinkle that usually lit his forest-green eyes was dimmed by a shadow that obscured his face as well. He looked like a burned out candle, all the light in him gone.

"Anthony, what are you doing here?" she inquired worriedly. The look on his face and the way his hand was frozen mid-air, as if he had forgotten he didn't need to continue knocking, was scaring her.

But nothing could have prepared her for what happened next. Anthony collapsed, falling at her feet.

She was kneeling next to him at once, alarmed by Anthony's actions.

"Anthony! Anthony, are you hurt? What's happened to you?" She said checking his pulse, and brushing off the hair from his eyes. His eyes were closed, his face contorted as if he were in pain. She checked him over, and other than being soaked nothing seemed physically wrong with him.

"Come," she tried to lift him up by the arms. "Come on! Work with me Anthony! I need to take you to the sofa. You can't stay on the floor all night long."

After some struggle, Anthony finally cooperated, rose slowly from the floor, and leaned on Rosalie. She guided him to the sofa where he fell with the force of a ton of bricks free-falling from a twentieth floor.

"What is wrong with you?" Rosalie asked sitting next to Anthony's limp body. He was lying in her sofa completely still, eyes closed again.

"Answer me Anthony. I'm begging you." She was so afraid by now. She didn't know what to do. She didn't know what was wrong.

"That's it! I'm calling your dad!" she proclaimed getting up and walking towards her phone. The moment she picked up her receiver, she heard Anthony murmur in a soft broken voice, "I want to be dead Rose. She was… and he was… they… I wish I was dead."

Rosalie gulped. His words didn't make any sense, but she could tell that the pain that had led him to his current state was not physical. He needed to rest, and he needed to change clothes before he caught a cold. With a heavy sigh she dialed the Cullens' house.

"Hello," a gruff voice she recognized as Mr. Cullen's answered the phone.

"Goodnight, um… sorry to call so late Mr. Cullen but Anthony is here and I was wondering if you could come get him. He's wet, and I don't know where he left his car…"

"Is he hurt?" Mr. Cullen interrupted her. She could hear the rustling of clothes and she assumed he was getting dressed.

"Honestly? I don't know Mr. Cullen. He's not making any sense, and I'm alone at home. I don't know what to do. All I can think of is keeping him warm until you get here."

"Okay, I'll be there in fifteen minutes." The line disconnected immediately and Rosalie walked to her door to close it, but before she could, a panting Marie almost knocked her over.

After she recovered her balance she could see Marie looked just as bad as Anthony did. Her clothes were sopping. She didn't have a jacket on, and some buttons on her blouse were not made.

_Had they fought? _Rosalie's house was just five blocks away from Marie's. So it only seemed logical that Anthony would seek shelter there if he had fought with Marie and he didn't have his car with him.

"Is he here?" Marie said between gasps trying to bring her breathing back to normal.

"Yes, he's in my living room. What happened?" Rosalie asked concerned about the state Marie and Anthony were in. They had fought a couple of times before, but never like this, never this bad.

"I… I…" Marie began but couldn't continue. Her eyes filled up with tears and it broke Rosalie's heart to see her so lost and broken. She had always pitied the girl, since before she had befriended her through Anthony. Her family was a mess and as a consequence she wasn't exactly the most functional girl.

She gave her a reassuring smile and invited her in before closing the door.

"Go to him," she murmured in her ear. "Do what you need to fix this. But please, be gentle, whatever happened between you two affected him a lot. I'll be in my room."

Sighing and hoping for the best, Rosalie walked to her room and closed the door behind her.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"What are you doing here?" Anthony asked righting himself to take a sitting position on the sofa.

Marie could hear all the pain, and anger in his voice that she knew she had caused him. She knew it the moment she realized what a terrible mistake she had made.

She still couldn't explain to herself what had possessed her to allow Demitri to take her. To take for himself a gift she had been saving for the love of her life — for Anthony.

It had all felt wrong, from the moment their naked skins touched, to the moment he was inside her. It was all wrong. The wrong hands, the wrong lips, the wrong arms, the wrong body, the wrong soul.

She knew it, and yet, she allowed it to continue. As wrong as Demetri was for her, at least in his arms she didn't feel pain. She didn't feel anything. She could forget her mother's cruel words. She could forget the kiss that broke her heart. It was all about physical release. Her heart wasn't at stake in Demitri's arms.

However, now she was being faced with the consequences of her actions, and it just wasn't worth it.

"I needed to talk to you. To fix this somehow," Marie said in a hoarse voice. She had never cried so much in a single day, and her voice was showing the effort it had endured.

"Fix this?" Anthony laughed bitterly standing up, and giving Marie a cold glare. He had never treated her like this, not even during their worst fights. This wasn't her Anthony anymore.

"What is there to fix?" he finally asked.

Marie sighed heavily, gathering what little strength she had left and said, "Our relationship Anthony. I love you so much I can't live without you. I'm willing to forget whatever is that you did with Tanya, if you forgive me for what I did with Demitri."

Anthony remained stony-faced. He had always worn his heart on his sleeve. Marie could always predict what he was thinking, or feeling from his expression. Now, he remained unmoving, unreadable.

Marie walked towards him in an attempt to press her case, to touch him and make sure that he was real, that they were still real.

The instant she moved, Anthony took a couple of steps back, avoiding her. He rounded the sofa and walked towards the door. Marie grew desperate, fearing that he might run again before she had a chance to repair their broken relationship. She followed him, decided to cling to him if it were necessary to make him wait.

"Stay where you are," Anthony commanded in an icy voice.

Marie forced her body to obey, even though all she wanted was to go to him, to hold him in her arms, and gain the absolution she needed to survive.

Anthony squared his shoulders, and spoke with a piercing tone. "Tanya and I had nothing to do with each other. If you want to, you can call Jacob, and ask him to tell you what really happened. Or if you won't believe my brother you could ask anyone who was around us at the time. I could even give you a list of witnesses, but they will all tell you the same thing: Tanya kissed me, and I didn't reciprocate. In fact, I almost instantly pushed her away. But of course you didn't stay to see that part. You immediately ran to the arms of your… your… whatever the hell _he_ is to you. Your fuck-buddy, your friend with benefits, I don't really care anymore. All I care about is that I walked in on you fucking him, in your own fucking bed!"

By the end of his speech Anthony was yelling. Each of his words had cut through Marie's heart like a hot-iron, piercing, wounding, leaving a mark not even time could erase.

_She had misconstrued the whole scene? Could it be possible that she ruined everything for nothing?_

"So you and Tanya?" she asked fearing the answer like she had never feared anything before.

"Nothing, me and Tanya nothing."

Tears were streaming down Marie's face but they weren't typical tears of sadness. They say the eyes are the window to the soul; they are also the means through which your soul bleeds when it's wounded — or in this case, broken.

Marie hugged herself like she was trying to contain the broken pieces of her soul escaping her body. However, souls once broken cannot be easily glued back together like a broken vase. No, broken souls are almost impossible to mend or contain. They seep out of our bodies, dissolve into space, and get lost. She was a lost soul now.

Anthony stood near the door, wearing a pained look. He was struggling with himself. He wanted to console Marie, but his own pain was just too much to allow him the strength to be of any comfort. His soul, too, had left his body. He was soulless, empty.

"I love you…" Marie murmured in a soft broken voice.

"I do too," Anthony answered simply. "But it's just not enough. You've broken every piece of me. I have nothing left to give."

Marie's eyes were filled with sorrow, her soul already shattered, breaking into impossibly smaller pieces. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, I was drunk, I was angry, I'm so sorry…" she repeated. She knew sorry was not enough. What she had done could not be taken back. She had destroyed the greatest thing she had. She always destroyed everything.

As if answering her thoughts he said, "Sorry just isn't enough anymore," and turned to leave.

"Please…" Marie whimpered.

Anthony sighed deeply, pressing his forehead to the door. It wasn't a frustrated sigh, or a longing one. It was an exhausted sigh; he could take no more.

"I can't…" he replied to Marie's plea. "I just can't anymore. If I stay I'll die."

"If you go I will," was her response.

"It doesn't matter," he added, turning to face her one last time. "I think we're both already dead, _mon amour_, and this is just our bodies having a pointless conversation."

And with that he left the room, closing the door behind him, closing his heart with it.

A wail rooted in the deepest part of Marie's chest could be heard through the entire house. The last piece of her soul had finally left her body.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Anthony walked outside just as his father was pulling up.

"Son! Son! Are you okay?" Carlisle asked concerned. The moment he walked outside he had seen the haunted look on his son's face and knew that something was terribly wrong.

Anthony clung to his father for support. He felt drained, and empty, on the verge of death. Only death could be this excruciating, he was sure of it.

"Please… please take me home," Anthony begged.

"Of course," Carlisle replied, and hurriedly helped his son to the passenger seat.

They pulled out and Anthony took one last look towards Rosalie's house. He had made up his mind. There was nothing left for him in Forks, only the ghosts of 'what if'.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Rosalie exited her room to make sure Marie was okay the moment she heard the car pulling out. She found her curled in the floor rocking herself and sobbing silently.

"What happened?" she asked dumbly. She didn't know what to say. She had heard parts of the conversation and from what she could tell it had ended badly.

"I ruined everything. I ruined it… I ruined it…" Marie repeated time after time.

Rosalie grabbed a throw from her sofa and wrapped it around the sobbing girl. She wished she could do something to help her friends. She wished she could do more.

They sat in silence until the dawn came. However, they never saw the sun as it rose in the horizon. The storm clouds remained.

**-x-x-x-x-**

_Ring around the rosey,_

_A pocketful of posies._

_ashes, ashes._

_We all fall down._


	13. Red Pill

**Quick A/N:**There's a play list on my Blog (http : / / angedelaube . blogspot . com / p / playlists . html) that goes with this chapter, if you want to listen to some music while you read, or want to listen to what I listened while I was writing.

**DISCLAIMER: Some lucky lady named Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight! I don't own a thing, just playing with her Universe.**

**This plotline, however, is mine. I really don't see the point in stealing something I'm already providing for free, so please refrain from plagiarizing this story. Thank you. **

**DISCLAIMER#2: I do not know anything about medicine or treatments. Everything in this chapter was thanks to Google. So, take it with a grain of salt…**

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**Chapter 11:**** Red Pill**

"**It's a symbol for your desire to return to reality. In your dreams you'll fall asleep."**

_Dr. Edgemar's quote from the Film Total Recall (1990)_

Blood is thicker than water, they say. This was a proverb that kept repeating itself in Bella's mind as she waited in the reception for her father.

He had called her just as Alice had announced that Edward's dad had news about Esme. She had told them to go ahead, that she'd wait for her father there, even though her whole being was telling her to go with Edward and hold his hand while he received the news — whatever news there may be. Some nagging part of her consciousness was telling her that she would be interrupting a private family moment. She was not part of his family, and this realization hurt her in an unexpected way. Everything about Edward affected her in unexpected ways.

Since the day they met, just a short week ago, every single thing that happened with him and around him was more intense than anything she had ever known. She had been invaded by a deluge of new feelings; feelings that had been foreign to her. She was even more surprised by the fact that instead of freaking out, she had welcomed these new feelings as old friends who stopped by for a visit after a very long time of not seeing each other. She felt older, stronger, more mature, she even felt wiser somehow.

She had always been different from the other kids her age, never forming long-lasting relationships, never feeling a connection towards anyone she met when she knew she should feel something. She had always felt a stranger in her own life, finding solace in her books and in her family. However, since she had stumbled — literally — into Edward, she had felt all of the things she had been missing. She had had that proverbial light-bulb moment where everything suddenly started to make sense. Everything just clicked into place. Her life, as of late, seemed to be accelerated, going at lightning speed and yet, she wasn't worried about all this change. The only thing that scared her to the bones was the possibility of itcoming to and end, whatever it was… Was it love?

She knew the answer to that question, but saying it aloud, acknowledging it — even in her mind — would make it more real, more threatening.

After hearing what love and heartache had done to her aunt, she wasn't sure love was something she was ready for yet she feared that it could be taken from her prematurely. She knew, deep down, that it was already too late; if Edward was taken away she would be broken. What a contradictory state of mind to be in.

"Bella," she heard her father call from a very distant place, it sounded almost like an echo in an empty room.

Bella blinked, the voice of her father bringing her out of her heavy thoughts, and everything came into focus. All of the hospital noises that she had been drowning out invaded Bella's ears. It was loud, and disorienting.

"Dad," Bella said in a daze.

"How are you kiddo? Is everything alright with your friend?" he asked, truly concerned about the boy. He may not like the idea of his little girl growing up too fast and having a boyfriend but he didn't want anything bad happening to the kid either.

"Yes, Edward is just fine… um… It's his mom. She had some sort of fainting fit. They're talking to the doctors now," she explained, stealing a glance towards the waiting room. She hadn't heard anyone crying or screaming, so she hoped the news wasn't too bad.

"And why are you out here then? Why aren't you with them? Isn't that why you're here?" Charlie couldn't understand why after coming to the hospital and waiting around for news she was standing in the reception.

"Um…" Bella hesitated, "it just felt off, like I was invading a private moment or something." She shrugged and looked towards the door again.

"Sweetie, it won't be invading if he wants you there," her father said in a soft, reassuring tone.

Bella swallowed the lump that had been constricting her throat ever since she saw Edward walking through those doors. She really wanted to be there, but feared that if something bad happened to Esme Edward would hate her. She could endure anything but Edward's hate.

"Come on!" Charlie encouraged, motioning his daughter towards the doors. "I bet you anything that he'll feel better if you're next to him. No matter what the news is."

Bella sighed, gathering strength to face whatever was behind those doors. She desperately hoped it was Edward's loving gaze and not his sorrowful teary eyes, or worse his hateful scowl. She wet her lips with her tongue and started to walk slowly.

One step at a time.

**-x-x-x-x-**

"Dad," Jacob exclaimed as he walked through the waiting room doors. His dad looked defeated, weary and ten years older than he did the last time he saw him. What had happened to his mother? He truly hoped it wasn't anything bad. He wasn't sure his family could survive another tragedy.

"Jacob, Edward…" Carlisle greeted in a robotic voice.

He was tired, physically and emotionally. He thought that things couldn't get any worse when he had seen his wife spiral into depression after Anthony's death, but the way she completely collapsed today had marred his heart and his psyche. He would never, in all his life, forget the things she said to him when he defended Edward's right to be with Bella if he wanted to or the way she dropped lifeless in bed at one point of their argument.

When they had arrived at the hospital, he wasn't coherent enough to treat his wife or evaluate her state. He was terrified.

He loved Esme with all his being ever since they were kids. She was his dream girl, the mother of his children, his wife, his soul mate. He couldn't conceive a life without her, a time after Esme.

He had been incredibly relieved when he saw that Dr. Berty was on call that day. He was a renowned doctor, that like him, had renounced the glamour and paycheck a hospital in the city had to offer for the small-town life his wife, as well as Esme, craved. He was the only man in Forks he would ever trust to treat his wife.

They had wheeled Esme straight into an exam room. Carlisle had been asked to wait outside while they assessed her. After he had fought, argued and begged to be allowed in Dr. Berty finally caved and permitted his presence in the room with the threat of having Felix remove him if he interfered at all. Felix was a six-foot-five, three-hundred-pound male nurse. Dr. Berty's threat was not an idle one.

After numerous exams and hours of waiting and pacing he finally had his answer. He wished he didn't know.

Dr. Berty's sympathetic look made Carlisle's heart sink. He really hated that look. He knew that look, had worn that look so many times during his career. He did not want it staring back at him now. Not Esme.

"Carlisle," Dr. Berty had started. He had the habit of calling him by his first name and not his last name like most people did in Forks Hospital. "I'm sure you can hazard a guess by now as to what happened to your wife. You've seen the test results and were here while we ran the exams, but I have to say it just the same."

Carlisle nodded and waited to hear out loud what he already knew inside.

"Your wife fainted because she has early stages of dilated cardiomyopathy. I would have to run more tests, but her previous history with alcohol when you lost Anthony, and the levels of alcohol found in her blood are making me more and more inclined to give an Alcoholic cardiomyopathy diagnosis. Do you think it's possible that Esme could have kept something like that hidden from you, an addiction like that hidden for so long?"

Carlisle wanted to say it wasn't possible, that the little episodes she had had with alcohol after Anthony's death, the first anniversary and a couple more in consequent years were just isolated incidents. Faced with the facts, he couldn't fool himself anymore, couldn't pretend everything was alright with Esme. Her behavior the day before was proof enough that there was a grave underlying problem with her emotional health alone. Her drinking herself to sleep last night was just one of many times.

Yes, he had to acknowledge the possibility that Esme was what many people called a functional alcoholic. He could no longer ignore the obvious and let his wife continue to sink lower dragging everyone with her.

Esme's health was already deteriorating. His son's emotional health and his family's wellbeing were at risk. He couldn't keep pretending everything was alright. He had to start by being honest with his family and discuss a solution together, as they should have done from the beginning.

It was with that conviction that he prepared himself to disclose the facts of Esme's condition to his sons and his granddaughter.

"Please, let's all take a seat," Carlisle began.

His family, eager for information on Esme's health agreed and sat. They just wanted answers, any sort of answers to calm the anxiety that had filled them for the last hour.

Carlisle looked at his sons, anxious and worried. He looked at his granddaughter, on the verge of tears, and dreaded the idea of telling them the truth. But that had been their mistake from the very beginning: sheltering Anthony, sheltering Esme, sheltering Edward and Alice. They made a sport out of keeping up appearances just to protect the status quo and not mess with the familial harmony. It was time to put an end to this vicious circle and finally accept they had problems like any other family.

Acceptance is the first step.

"Edward, Jacob, Alice," he addressed his family. He realized Tanya wasn't present and asked Jacob about it.

"She's showing some houses in Port Angeles and she has her cell phone off, but I left her a message," Jacob replied urging his father to continue with a pleading look.

Carlisle nodded, slumped onto his chair, emotionally exhausted, and continued, "After many exams, we have concluded that your mother has early stages of a type of cardiomyopathy…"

Alice's gasp interrupted him. She looked panicked. She didn't know exactly what a cardio-whatever was, but she knew it was bad.

Carlisle gave her what he hoped was a comforting look and carried on. The rest of his news was bound to generate much worse reactions than a gasp from his family. He wished he could put this off, but therein lay the root of their problems.

"Basically, Esme's heart is weakened and enlarged. This condition causes a strain in the heart muscle and it's unable to pump blood as it should. In a way, our fight this morning was a good thing. If it weren't for the fact that arguing with me made her heart pump furiously we probably would have missed this until it was too late. Alcoholic cardiomyopathy is not so common in women and it's often asymptomatic until it has progressed to an advanced stage."

Edward, Jacob and Alice shared looks of disbelief.

It seemed as if Edward's life had become a rollercoaster. In the last forty-eight hours he had discovered he had had another brother, that his dreams were probably being caused by said brother and his possibly murderous girlfriend, he fought with his mother, shared his first kiss and found out his almost aunt had played a key role in starting the Anthony and Marie saga.

Edward's world no longer made sense to him. He went from the boredom and apathy that had filled his days, to the excitement of first love and the many roadblocks it had already encountered.

_In a way it's as if the nightmares are slowly slipping into my reality_, Edward mused.

"Wait a minute," Jacob interjected. "You said alcoholic cardiomyopathy? What does that mean? What does alcohol have to do with any of this?"

Carlisle stiffened. This was the piece of information that would surely anger his family the most. He had been an accessory in hiding Esme's addiction, albeit unconsciously. He had known for a very long time that Esme was no longer _his_ Esme. He had seen the changes but he had blinded himself. He just wasn't ready to see how far things had gone. He had fooled himself into thinking that drinking a whole bottle of scotch per week was normal, until a bottle became two, and two became three…

Then he had reasoned that Esme was a functional citizen; that their sons didn't know about her addiction, so it surely wasn't an addiction like he was starting to believe. After all, weren't alcoholics supposed to be lowlifes with no family, friends or anything one would consider normal? Esme had all of those things, she dressed nice, smelled nice, kept the house clean, took care of their underage son, indubitably alcohol couldn't be a problem, could it? Not with her doing all those things. However, now that the blindfold had finally fallen, he had to behold the truth. The truth was it was a _very_ big problem.

He sighed heavily, and rubbed his eyes trying to clear his mind before he answered. "Most of the times, the causes behind a dilated cardiomyopathy are not discovered. However, the patient's medical history can help us determine if there's a known cause behind the condition. After an examination, it became apparent that the cause behind your mother's condition wasn't due to any of the common causes. Dr. Berty asked me about her alcohol levels and I had to agree with him that alcohol could be the cause."

"What do you mean alcohol could be the cause? Mom is not an alcoholic!" Edward seethed in a low menacing voice, enraged by his father's claim.

"Son," Carlisle tried to pacify Edward. No good would come from him making a scene in the middle of the waiting room.

"No, no, no! Mom is not an alcoholic. I spend a lot of time in the house with her. I would have seen it, I would have known…" Edward continued, undeterred by Carlisle's interruption. Yes, his mom drank but she was a social drinker, she had never gotten drunk until last night. She was not an alcoholic, she just couldn't be.

"Listen son," Carlisle said standing up and going to sit next to Edward. He grabbed Edward by the shoulders and made him look at him straight in the eye before he carried on, "Not all alcoholics are like the ones we see in movies, some can actually function for a great number of years as normal people before the vice starts to take its toll on their lives. You didn't know your mother, how she was before your brother died – her OCD tendencies, her emotional outbursts… There are so many things you don't see, so many things she hides from you. From us all to an extent."

"No!" Edward yelled, getting up and taking a couple of steps towards the door.

Alice was crying silently, wrapped in Jacob's arms while he remained quiet and watched his father try to make his brother see reason. Deep down Jacob knew Carlisle was right. He had known Esme from before Anthony's death and the mother that raised him was not the same mother that had raised Edward.

"Edward, calm down, please just hear me out," Carlisle insisted, but he saw that he was fighting an already lost battle. Edward was an expert in denial, just as much as he and his wife were. _Of all traits to pass down __to our__ kids, _Carlisle thought as he approached Edward.

"No, I refuse to stand here and hear you drag my mother's name through the mud. She's not an alcoholic and this heart problem she has must have another explanation. Go do more tests! Do whatever you have to do, but don't come to me and tell me my mom is an alcoholic!" Edward shouted, his voice a mix of sadness and desperation.

As the words left his mouth Bella and Charlie Swan walked through the doors.

They had heard voices rising, but she never expected to encounter Edward shouting and distraught. He was yelling at his own father, hurt and fury tainting his features. What could have happened to make the sweet, mild-mannered Edward Bella had come to know act in the way he was?

Before she could ask though, Edward stomped out of the room, opening the doors with so much ferocity that they almost came off of their hinges.

"What was that about?" Charlie asked, truly worried about the boy. He had gotten the impression that Edward was a very mature kid for his age and he didn't see him throwing a tantrum of that magnitude without good cause.

"He just heard some upsetting news," Jacob replied in a weary voice. He immediately recognized Charlie from the last time they had seen each other all those years ago. "Good to see you again Charlie, even given the circumstances."

"Jacob?" Charlie asked, studying the features of the man standing in front of him, trying to match his face to that of the young man he had met in a hospital fifteen years ago.

"Yes. How are you Charlie?" Jacob asked with a watery smile. He had met Charlie in similar circumstances. _Actually, far worse circumstances_, he added mentally. They had met the night Anthony and Marie died.

"I'm good. Is he going to be okay?" he asked with concern.

"He will once he cools off. He just needs some time to calm down." Jacob replied. He was much too preoccupied with the news and consoling a sobbing Alice to go after Edward and talk some sense into him.

"Dad," Bella whispered in a broken voice which immediately drew Charlie's attention. He turned to find his daughter's eyes clouded with tears and panicked at seeing her sad expression.

"What is it hon?" She seemed so vulnerable and broken, much like the boy who just fled the premises had looked.

"Dad, would it be okay if I went after Edward? I promise I'll make him stay close by. I just… I think he needs someone to talk to…" Bella asked.

Under normal circumstances Charlie wouldn't have wanted his little girl anywhere near a boy as upset as Edward had seemed. However, he could see in his daughter's eyes that she didn't want to follow after him solely for his benefit. She needed to make sure he was okay, try to make him be okay just as much as the boy probably needed her. That amount of dependence scared Charlie quite a bit. He had only ever seen that look in couples like Jacob and his wife, or… he gulped trying to avoid comparing his little princess with her aunt Marie.

"Okay, go… But keep that cell phone of yours on and call us if you need help calming him," Charlie said in what he hoped was a teasing tone. He wanted to take away some of the edge off the situation, make his daughter feel like everything would be alright.

"I will, Dad," Bella responded and sprinted after Edward. She hoped he hadn't gone very far.

"Okay while those two calm each other I think we have a lot of catching up to do Carlisle. If there's anything I can do…" Charlie trailed off, leaving the door open for an amnesty between the Swans and the Cullens.

Carlisle nodded, appreciating the opportunity of having someone to talk to who wasn't emotionally invested in Esme's health.

"Jacob, why don't you take Alice to my office and get her a drink or something. She can't keep crying like that."

"Okay, I'll wait for you in the office," Jacob agreed. "Charlie, I hope we can see each other again soon. Please send my regards to Renee. I haven't seen her in so long."

"I will Jake. It was a pleasure seeing you again, even given the situation." Charlie smiled sympathetically, trying to convey in that small gesture his support in the hope of having an amicable relationship with his daughter's best friend's father.

Once Jacob and Alice were out of earshot Carlisle guided Charlie into an empty room. He didn't want an audience and considering how close Edward had become to Bella he realized he would need to fill Charlie in. He would possibly need his help and Bella's too to deal with Edward.

"I don't really know where to begin, so I guess I'll just start from when your family left town after Marie's burial."

**-x-x-x-x-**

"Edward wait!" a breathless Bella yelled hoping to catch Edward's attention. He was walking, more like sprinting, towards the wooded area behind Forks Hospital.

Mercifully, Edward stopped but Bella could see him clenching and unclenching his fists as if he wanted to beat something. She wondered briefly, if maybe it had been a good idea to follow him after all, but she scolded herself almost immediately for even thinking Edward could put her in any danger.

She reached the spot where he was standing and waited. She didn't know if she could touch him, if he would let her, but she wanted to… _so badly_. After a few minutes Bella grew frustrated. Edward didn't seem to be calming down, not even a little bit.

"Edward… I'm going to hug you. I'm just warning you because in the condition you are in you look like you will hit anything that stands in your way."

Edward didn't reply and he didn't turn. He continued to stand in the exact same place. Bella took that as an affirmative that he had heard her and wasn't against being hugged – that, or he was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't care.

She slowly raised her arms and circled him from behind. At first she hugged him softly. She embraced him like you would a delicate crystal vase that could break with the smallest vibrations, but then all the worry and feeling that had been plaguing her mind engulfed her and her hold grew tighter and tighter until she was hugging him with all of her strength.

The gesture seemed enough to break down whatever wall was keeping Edward away from her and he sunk to the floor, sobbing, taking Bella with him.

They kneeled on the ground for what felt like forever. Bella held him, breathing in his scent. Edward let all the stress and sorrow that had been choking him loose in his tears. He melted into Bella's loving embrace, clutching her to him like she was his savior.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," Bella muttered softly against his neck. "I don't know what happened but whatever it was I'm here for you. Please let me help you."

Edward swallowed, his throat parched from his sobs. He needed to compose himself and talk to Bella. If there was anyone who could help him make sense of the news he received it was Bella.

After some calming breaths he felt able to reply. He buried his face in Bella's hair, hiding behind its veil as if her strawberry scented tresses could keep the fear away. He prepared himself to say the words that had been repeating in his mind since his father had broken the news.

"My mother is an alcoholic."

Bella didn't say anything. She didn't say it would be alright because she didn't know it would be and she frankly thought that was condescending. She also didn't say she understood because she hadn't the slightest idea of how she would deal with similar news of her own. However, she did say the one true certainty in the midst of all this drama.

"She loves you Edward. That's all I know."

Edward nodded and stood. Bella feared she had said the wrong thing, but felt better when instead of running away he extended his hand to help her get up.

"Come, there's a bench at the edge of the forest and some swings. Let's go sit there so we can talk."

They walked for a few meters and just as Edward had said there was a makeshift playground right at the edge of the forest.

"They built this so that the kids that visited the hospital had somewhere to play. Alice and I used to play on these swings while my mom waited on the bench for my father. Then we would meet Jacob and Tanya somewhere for food, the diner, or somewhere in Port Angeles, always on Fridays during the summer. Mom loves to cook but Dad and Jacob insisted that since Tanya and she had to deal with the two of us twenty-four-seven they deserved a break at least once a week."

Bella didn't comment. She thought it was best to just let Edward talk of his own accord. Let him open up at his own pace.

They sat together on the bench. Bella sat a bit far from Edward's body, trying to give him space to gather his thoughts. Edward had other ideas in mind and he pulled her body close to him, snuggling into her.

They sat in silence for a while. The wind blew small yellowish leaves around their feet and Bella observed their little dance. She wondered why life had to be so hard on them. They were too young to be dealing with all this, too young to be haunted by nightmares, too young to be dealing with alcoholic parents and unsolved mysteries.

_I guess you're never too young for life_, Bella mused as she focused on the leaves dancing swirls and doing pirouettes on the ground.

After what felt like an eternal silence, Edward spoke, "I always knew that she drank a little after I went to bed. But I always thought it was normal, something all adults did after dinner. Sometimes, when Dad had an all-night shift, she would fall sleep on the couch and I thought she was just too tired to go to her room. I never realized her drinking was a problem because she was never loud. She never yelled or made scenes, or even looked drunk around me. But now I can see it all. In hindsight, things seem so obvious."

"Hindsight is twenty-twenty," Bella said, lifting her gaze to meet Edward's sad eyes. She ran her thumb over his cheekbone trying to convey in actions that she wished she could take away his pain.

"Edward," she began, straitening so that they were face to face but never abandoning his embrace. "You weren't supposed to see those signs. You were a kid. You're still young. She is an adult and your father is an adult… Heck, even your brother should have seen those signs, but not you. How could you have known? If your father who is a doctor didn't know, then how were you supposed to?"

Edward lowered his gaze and fixed his eyes on his lap. He knew that what Bella said was true; that he couldn't have known, that he wasn't supposed to see those signs for what they were. Sadly, that didn't make him feel any better. He was exhausted, tired of dealing with these problems that were all rooted in the same two names: Anthony and Marie.

If it weren't for their actions, the pain they caused one another and their families he wouldn't have been sitting here like this. If it weren't for the nightmares that had haunted him all of his life, he could have been less of a recluse, he wouldn't have a dysfunctional family, a life full of secrets, he could have been happy with Bella without having to deal with so many obstacles.

Then anger settled in, anger for all the sleepless nights he tried to make himself stay awake just so that he didn't have to suffer through another nightmare. He felt anger for all the tears his mother had shed for her lost son and all the damage she had done to herself trying to erase the hurtful memories from her mind. He felt anger because his new and burgeoning relationship with the only girl he had ever liked was tainted by the drama of a past tragedy that had nothing to do with them.

Edward saw red.

He wanted to kick something, anything. He wanted to scream. He wanted to wake up and realize that _this_ was all a bad dream. That he wasn't here, sitting in the same park where he had enjoyed so many childhood afternoons trying to come to terms with the news of his mother's condition.

He got up fast, surprising Bella with the speed of his actions and the fury with which he raked his fingers through his hair as he paced in front of the bench.

"Grrr…" He growled, making Bella flinch at the angry energy that was coming off him in waves.

"I'm so fucking tired of this shit!" Edward shouted. Bella was taken aback by the intensity of his outburst. She had never seen him mad or even heard him swear, granted they hadn't known each other for that long.

"Everywhere we turn there is a new problem waiting, a new crisis! Ugh! As if the dreams weren't enough! As if my mom hating your family wasn't enough! Now this?" Edward walked with purpose towards the swings and started kicking and hitting one until the chain gave out and the swing fell.

All this was happening while Bella watched in horror, insecure of what she should do, how she should approach Edward.

"Are you happy?" Edward yelled directing his eyes heavenward. "Is this what you want? Do you want us to be as miserable as you two were? Do you want to see history repeat itself? Of course! In my dreams you talk! In my dreams you never shut the fuck up! You make us go through these horrible experiences, night after night, and why? So that we can learn from the past or just so that we are twice as unhappy as you were?"

Bella only managed to gawk in shock and sadness. Edward, the joyful boy with whom she had watched movies, shared secrets and first kisses was not the enraged boy who was now destroying a second swing.

This scene reminded her of her nightmares too much. She almost expected Edward's face to shift into Anthony's. She waited for the clouds to completely darken the grey afternoon, turning it into night. She feared the moment the park would turn into that gloomy street where Marie and Anthony had argued, sobbed and broke down in the first nightmare she was able to remember. Her life was slowly morphing into a never ending sequence of déjà vu, a never ending nightmare. Where was the red pill***** when you needed it?

"Fuck!" Edward yelled and Bella felt a cold chill run through her entire frame when she heard his screaming voice. He was in pain and she couldn't bear it.

She got up from her seat as fast as her feet and faulty coordination would allow and ran to Edward's side.

His hand was bleeding, and although normally that would freak her out much like she had felt when his lip was injured, her first instinct was to clean the wound, to take care of him.

"Edward, let me see your hand please," she muttered slowly, as if she were talking to a wild and wounded animal, one that could strike at any moment. She wasn't afraid per se, but she knew that sometimes angry people could lose control, not fully aware of their actions.

He looked at her as if he didn't recognize her, as if she were a stranger, and for a second Bella's heart stopped.

Thankfully, whatever spell he was under didn't last long, and recognition flooded his features.

"Bella," he said in a low hoarse voice – the voice of a haunted man, not that of the sad little boy that had been standing in front of her.

Then he hugged her. He gathered her in his arms and drowned himself in her scent. Freesia and strawberry was all Edward needed, all that he wanted. He was not going to let ghosts rule his life. He was the master of his own fate and the past was the past, there was no point dwelling on what you can't change.

Bella was his present and hopefully his future. _No, not hopefully, surely_, Edward thought as he clung to Bella, burying his nose in that spot where her shoulder and neck met. With Bella in his arms, all pain was forgotten, even his possibly broken hand.

Bella let him do what he needed to do. She allowed herself to enjoy his closeness, his warmth, and the peace it brought with it because she needed it too.

"Are you better?" she asked after a few minutes in which Edward's breathing had seemed to reach a normal tempo again.

"I don't know…" he replied truthfully. He wasn't sure he was okay, but he was sure everything else was as long as he kept Bella in his arms, close to him.

"You will be…" Bella answered simply. "Now please let me see your hand."

Edward reluctantly separated himself from her to let her examine his hand. It was bruised and bloody from beating the wooden swing. He could see small splinters around his knuckles and was sure it would swell in no time.

"Oh Edward…" Bella said in a small voice, kissing the palm of his hand gently. It was the only area she was certain it wouldn't hurt him. "I'm so sorry… so, so sorry… I wish I could do something, anything to fix this. To make Anthony and Marie's ghosts go away, to make your mom get better… I wish…"

"Shush…" Edward interrupted her, placing his pointer finger atop her lips. "We are together in this. Don't forget you're being haunted by the same ghosts I am. We'll fix it, okay?"

"Okay." Bella nodded. "It's just that sometimes I think that maybe if I hadn't moved to this town, that if I was still living in Seattle… maybe… um…"

"What?" Edward asked, worried. He didn't like the idea of never having met Bella one bit. His life was like a black and white movie before she entered it and now, as if he had found his own personal Oz the minute she stumbled into him, his life had lit up into a Technicolor world. There was magic when she was around and only grey days when she was away.

Bella sighed heavily before replying, "I just think that maybe we would have gotten over the nightmares at some point and you wouldn't be in this situation. Your mom only drank like that last night because she was upset over my presence and…"

Bella was interrupted again by Edward, but this time he used his lips instead of his finger. Gently, and oh so softly, he caressed her lips with his. Tenderly, and oh so sweetly, he nipped on her lower lip. However, it was when his tongue timidly peaked out of his mouth to sweep across her lips enticingly that all the sensors in her brain fried.

She was surely having a near death experience. She had never thought that French-kissing could be enjoyable. She had judged the act as gross and ridiculous-looking in her fifteen-year-old innocence. But that tentative taste of Edward's tongue had obliterated all her previous assumptions and now she couldn't wait until he dared to do it properly. She was anxious for the kiss but not brave enough to be the one to deepen it, he would have to be the initiator.

Soon, much too soon for both their tastes, Edward pulled back. They were both panting as if they had run a marathon, their hearts leaping in their chests in wild exhilaration.

After they were both able to calm their breathing, Edward gently placed a kiss on Bella's forehead, making her whole body tingle and her face blush.

Edward placed his forehead against Bella's and with his eyes closed he said, "Don't ever say that we would be better off apart because I don't know about you, but I've come to life since I met you. I can't really explain it. I don't understand it, but the moment you crashed into me and I looked into your eyes, I finally felt complete. I've been feeling lost, empty and confused all of my life. You and only you could ever make me feel the opposite of that and I know it's too soon, and I know I should be scared, and I know that I'm too young, and yet it all finally fits…"

"Like a key in a lock," Bella interjected.

"Like a key in a lock…" Edward repeated breathlessly, placing a gentle kiss on her nose.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. You're absolutely right. If there's something I've learned from Anthony and Marie's story is that some things, some relationships are just too essential to give up. We must fight for what we want."

"Stop apologizing please. None of this is your fault. Just… just never say anything like that again, okay? I feel sad just thinking of a world where you don't exist."

"Me too…" Bella replied earnestly. "Now let's go inside, it looks like rain and we need to get your hand cleaned up and checked."

"When does it not look like rain in Forks?" Edward laughed playfully and for a moment, lost in the sound of his laughter, Bella forgot there was a world outside their bubble.

**-x-x-x-x-**

Bella was miserable that Monday morning in school. Edward was in Seattle with Carlisle and Jacob getting his mom settled in a special hospital where she could be treated for her addiction as well as her heart condition.

She didn't know many details, because the adults hadn't thought it appropriate to tell 'the kids', but she knew Edward would be back with Jacob in the evening. Carlisle would stay in Seattle, even though he couldn't see Esme everyday.

Bella understood why. If Edward was in Esme's place she would do the same. She wouldn't want to be three or four hours away. She would want to be as close as possible, even if all she could do was pester the doctors to death for information.

However, what had made her morning worse than she had anticipated was the new addition to Forks High – James Hunter had joined the ranks of the high school student body and Bella already dreaded attending class.

Luckily for her, they didn't seem to share a single class. Unluckily for her, this didn't seem to stop him from seeking out any opportunity to try to engage her in, or strike up a conversation. Apparently, he was pretending Sunday afternoon didn't happen. Like Bella could ever forget his beady eyes or the calculating way he had studied her the day before. _Like a hunter would stalk its prey…_

_How very apt that his last name __is – Hunter_, Bella mused as she continued to tap her fingers on her desk. She was trying to will the handles of the big clock above the teacher's desk to move faster. So far, it was an utter fail.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the hands moved to the correct position and the class was dismissed. Bella was going home and when Edward called her, she was going to Alice's house — where Edward would be staying while his parents were away — to meet with him. She could hardly wait.

Like moving on clouds, she swiftly walked towards her locker and gathered all the books she would need to take home with her. She placed Edward's homework inside a folder and smiled.

She had nagged Alice to be the one to take care of that responsibility. Alice had been reluctant, anxious to do something for her cousin, but had relented in the end when Bella told her that was her excuse to get to see Edward right after he came back.

Alice's budding romantic life gave her new insight into Edward and Bella's relationship. She knew she would probably go to similar extremes to see James, so she had decided to help by agreeing with that small concession.

Once Bella had collected all she would need, she closed her locker only to be confronted by a smirking face she would have rather not seen.

"James," Bella acknowledged dejectedly. "What can I do for you?"

"Many, many things, dearest Isabella…" he responded, his smirk growing impossibly larger, his white teeth making him look much more menacing than a fifteen year old boy had any right to. "But right now I just want to know where Alice is. Do you know by any chance? She told me earlier this morning to meet her by her locker, which coincidentally happens to be the one next to yours."

"No, sadly I don't know. Why don't you wait for her here like she asked you to? I'm sure her class is just running late, and she'll be here in any minute," Bella started to walk away, annoyed by the fact that in spite of Alice's uncanny intuition she failed to see just how big of a jerk James was. She would have to have a talk with her as soon as possible, maybe later today when she went to her house.

However, before she could go far, someone grabbed her by the wrist. She flinched away from the unwelcome touch, repulsed by the negative energy she received from it. It was the exact opposite of what she felt when Edward touched her.

"What is it with you and all the grabbing? Don't you have a sense of personal space?" Bella hissed, beyond irate over James' actions.

James eyes twinkled wickedly.

Bella's stomach sank. She wanted to act brave, but there were times like these when James scared her, when he looked older, and almost _evil_. She tried her hardest to maintain her confident façade.

"Aw… boo… I just wanted to ask you to keep me company until Alice arrived. No need to get angry over something so small."

"Are you mental? First of all, my dad is probably waiting for me outside in his car, and second of all, as much as you would like to pretend otherwise, we aren't friends."

James' eyes gleamed with an unnamed feeling that shook Bella to the core. He looked like an ancient demon preparing to unleash his anger upon the little human. She wondered briefly if he was possessed.

"What's your favorite animal or insect Bella?" he suddenly asked with mischievousness plastered all over his features.

"Um…" _Talk about non sequitur_, Bella thought. "Why do you ask?"

"Just answer the question," James insisted menacingly.

Bella considered it best to play along. "Dolphins."

"Excellent choice," James said excitedly, as if she was a toddler who had gotten the right answer after many attempts. "Smart animals, dolphins. They are very sensitive and friendly. They trust humans more than they should too. Their friendliness is both a blessing and a curse for them. Sadly, they never see the humans for what they are. It suits you."

Bella eyed him carefully, trying to gauge what he had intended with this little game. Scare her more, maybe? His face was unreadable.

"You know what my favorite animal or insect is?" he asked before she could ponder about his questions further. "The spider," he continued. "They are small but precise. They knit a web in an inconspicuous place, like a tree branch or a bush, and they wait. They just wait. They don't need any fancy tricks or to stalk its prey like most predators do. They just need to be patient and know when the perfect moment to strike is. The unaware little bugs fall into its trap without the spider having to do anything. They just can't see the web the spider knitted until it's too late to get away. All that's left is for the spider to feast on its new victim.

"However, the spider is also different in its feeding habits. She doesn't eat fast for fear of other predators stealing her food. She mummifies it and eats it in small intervals. Don't you agree that the spider is a fine specimen of Nature's best?"

Bella gulped. Her lips felt dry all of the sudden, and she wasn't sure if James wanted her to agree or to be frightened out of her wits. She chose silence instead. All of his speech had seemed like a horrible metaphor of something Bella feared he would do to Alice, or to her.

James continued, undeterred by Bella's silence. "Some spiders however are trickier. Like fishermen, they use smaller bugs they've caught to attract bigger ones. They place their bait in the middle of their web, and they wait until another bug falls for the illusion of an easy meal."

James grinned like he owned the world and all of its secrets.

Bella had started to take a few steps back when he looked behind her calling, "Alice, dear!"

Bella turned and found Alice walking towards them. She felt her heart stop beating when Alice jumped into James' embrace like old lovers meeting after a long time.

This was not good.

"Bella," Alice greeted. "I just talked to Edward. He'll be home around six. You're more than welcome to join us for dinner. James will be there too." Alice smiled adoringly at James when she mentioned this fact.

"Of course she'll be there. Won't you Bella?"

"Um…" Bella hesitated, but clearing her throat she carried on, "Of course. I'll be there, Alice." She didn't address James or even look at him. She needed to have a serious talk with Alice, and she needed to have it tonight.

"Okay, see you then." Alice hugged her gently before walking away, hand in hand, with James.

Bella felt ill. Alice was in great danger.

* * *

***Red Pill:** The term **redpill** is a pop culture term that was popularized in science fiction culture via the 1999 film _The Matrix_. Borrowing from the movie, the terms **blue pill** and **red pill** have become a popular metaphor for the choice between the blissful ignorance of illusion (blue) and embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality (red). Source: Wikipedia.

**PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT:** if you're good with grammar, and have some time to spare would you consider joining Project Team Beta? They are in need of Betas. If you're please apply, they help a lot of authors get their stories Beta'd, the same stories you read and entertain yourself with. Thank you, you can find a link to their Web Page in my profile.

**A/N **Um… sorry? I really am sorry but things just happen when you're writing things this way. I did learn something though. If I ever write anything after this, I'll write the whole thing and have it Beta'd before posting. Life is a learning experience so at least I take the positive out of my writer's block. Anyways… thank you to those who are still hanging there. I really appreciate the patience, and I promise to do my best, always, just for you.

I would like to give a special thanks to **Indie Fic Pimp**, and **Obsmama**. **Obsmama** wrote a lovely review on AS for the **Indie Fic Pimp blog**, and I can never thank them enough for their kindness. It was surprise I found out through twitter, and unlike Bella I love surprises.

If you want to read the review, it's posted here:

http : / / indieficpimp . blogspot . com / 2010 / 09 / wip-of-week-910-916 . html

_Just delete the extra spaces._

As always, thank you to **Rhian0000** for her help with my messy chapters. She's truly brilliant, and I have no words to express how grateful I am to count her amongst my friends. Thank you as well to **lemonmartinis**, she's a lovely spark of sunshine, and she gives me the best insight into my story. I couldn't do this without their help.

I have a rec for this week that I'm sure will make me lose my Wussperv Queen crown, but I'm okay with it.

**One of These Nights** by **MellieB40**.

Angela is a paid escort. Edward is a Divorced 37 year old Surgeon, who is Angela's favorite client. Bella is Angela's 27 year old neighbour who is going through a messy divorce. It's labelled Romance/Angst, and 10 chapters in. So far I'm loving it. I know! I'm shocked myself, but it's Edward/Bella in spite of the messy beginning, so it's not completely wussperv unfriendly you know… LOL… Anyways, if you need something to read, give it a chance. You can find the link in my FanfictionNet Community 'MUST READ by ANGE'

So that's all for now,

(Hugs and Kisses)

Ange xxx

**PS. Rhian0000** made me a new Banner which you can see on my Story's Blog, there's a Banners page now.

**:o)**

She's just too nice to me.


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